How to make the BEST of your 20’s | simple life advice … — Transcript

When I was in my early 20s, I wish somebody would have sat me down and given me this exact advice that I'm about to give you.

Get your notebook out and your pen, and we are going to take notes together, because I want you to have the best possible years of your life.

I think we can all relate to the feeling of being a little behind, especially when we're in our 20s, which is this big, big deal, right? And with reason, because in our 20s, it's this is our prime.

This is the time where we can prepare our future. I'm going to give you ten solid life tips that I wish I had in my early 20s.

And if you're not in your early 20s, maybe you're in your mid or late 20s, this applies to anyone still.

So if you're starting over and you're past that point, do not worry.

Hi friends, it's Krizia, welcome back to the channel, if you're new here, it's so nice to meet you.

If you're into growing up from the inside out, then you may want to consider subscribing.

I want to start this by saying you're not alone.

I know how hard this is because I have been there.

I have felt behind for a long time, probably up until the recent few years.

I have really, truly felt like everyone else had it figured out and I didn't.

It's never too late.

It's never too late to change your life.

It's never too late to start something new.

You don't need to have it all figured out.

In fact, nobody has it all figured out.

Which leads me to my first point.

Failing fast is a mindset.

It's a mindset that is important for so many reason.

You're probably thinking, why would anyone want to fail?

It's humiliating.

It sucks.

You have to start over.

But I need you to understand that is a good thing.

The faster you fail.

Because, look, no matter if someone seem to have life figured out, they're going to fail at some point.

We all are.

We're going to fail at on a small level, on a big level, many times throughout our lifetime here on Earth.

That is just inevitable.

I need you to understand that.

And the faster you can fail, the faster you get to where you need to be.

Reframe your mindset on failure.

I know failure is scary, but the more that you fail, the less scary it becomes.

And the more you start to realize that it's actually part of the journey, it is necessary to succeed.

If you're someone who wants to succeed at anything, you don't have to be want to be a millionaire.

But if you want to succeed at something, at a career, if you want to succeed on a path, you want to succeed at helping someone.

You want to succeed in any way, shape or form, you will fail.

I need you to just be comfortable with the thought that failure is.

It's necessary.

Every single person that you meet who you may find as successful has failed more times than you know.

Think about something you failed at.

Did you learn something from it?

Most likely, yes.

If you failed in a relationship, you learned how to look for a better one the next time, or how to show up is a better person the next time.

If you failed at a job, you probably learn to not make that mistake again, or you probably learned how to find a better job.

So on and so forth.

The faster you fail, the faster you get to learn.

You need to know what works and what doesn't.

And it's honestly so freeing, like the first few times that you fail because you're like, okay, that wasn't as bad, I didn't die.

Each failure teaches you a valuable lesson that nothing else, I promise you, can teach you no amount of textbooks, no amount of YouTube videos that you watch could ever teach you any better than when you actually make mistakes yourself.

Time is the most valuable thing, and the less time you waste on it.

Thinking of what could be or thinking about what you should start.

The sooner you can get to actually building experience, building that knowledge, building your skills.

You're speeding up the process to get to your dream life.

Failure is not your enemy.

It is actually your friend.

Second on the list that I really, really wish I knew as early as possible was that it's okay to be multifaceted.

It's okay to have multiple passions and multiple things that you're interested in.

It's actually an advantage.

I really wish that somebody had given me the permission to be a multifaceted human being.

As someone who felt like I was, there was something wrong with me because I couldn't pick a one career.

Like a lot of my friends in high school did, you are going to be more likely to learn new skills, multiple skills at the same time.

You're going to broaden your network because you're going to meet so many different types of people across different industries because you are multifaceted.

For example, when I first started dabbling into careers, I thought I wanted to be a fashion designer.

I still want to create my own line one day, but that's what I thought I wanted to be, right?

I met people and fashion, branched off into graphic design, and I started freelancing in and graphic design with very little skill.

My ad.

So it is possible I met a ton of people through graphic design projects.

Now I'm a content creator.

I've met so many people.

Through being a content creator, your network will be so much more broad and diverse because you are trying multiple things.

And it just honestly makes your life that much more interesting and unique.

I also believe that having multiple passions really does boost your creativity.

Because you're adapting yourself to thinking in unique ways that if you were just solely focused on one thing you would probably have not done.

And you would probably miss a lot of opportunities.

By being singular focus, it does have its pros and cons, of course.

But I would say if you're multiple passionate, like use that to your advantage because you can not only meet more people, but you can think in a different way.

Because, you know, I have to say, looking back now, all the things that I've tried in my life so far, all the creative things and outlets and freelancing and stuff that I've done.

It's given me this really interesting perspective on how I approach things now.

And I didn't realize that until recently that that's actually an asset.

That is a skill, because as sometimes for a content creator gig, they're looking for someone who can edit.

Who knows how to do marketing, who has, who can think in a marketing way, who can be a great makeup artist.

Like you have, you have more combined skills, and that gives you a unique approach to solutions that I don't think you're aware of.

If you naturally have that, you're already ahead.

Number three is stop trying to fit in.

It's a good thing to not fit in.

You know?

I know sometimes it can suck when you don't have, like, your group of friends because on TV and on shows, you constantly see girls in groups.

And you're like, oh my gosh, I want that.

It's the same thing with relationships.

You know, if you're single, you're probably thinking like, oh, I want love sometimes.

Or maybe not for the most part.

I know a lot of us may feel lonely if we don't have, like, a group of friends.

But you start to think more as an individual when you're not in a group setting.

What happens when?

And I'm not saying this to bash friend groups because, you know, if that's your thing, naturally it's your thing.

But if you don't have a friend group, for example, you probably have more trust in your own opinion than someone who is used to being in a group.

Because what happens when you are in a group is you end up conforming to each other.

You kind of start to become the same person.

The same way of thinking, the same type of mindset.

And it doesn't promote individual thinking, because when you voice something like an opinion, for example, in a group setting.

You end up just kind of like playing it safe and more comfortable.

It's not always easy to be your most authentic self because we conform.

It's just human nature.

We want to be accepted and we want to fit in.

And that's of course, something we cannot change.

Like to some extent it's healthy.

Just stop prioritizing the need to fit in.

You know, like don't change who you are just to be liked by anybody.

When you let go of the need for approval, you also free yourself from that pressure to conform into society.

And to groups into being accepted.

And it really teaches you how to validate yourself without needing external validation.

And also, I would say by not worrying so much about fitting in.

You're going to have a much more unique experience with life too.

Learning how to meet new people, like this is all very valuable skills.

Think about a time where you went to an event, right?

You bring your friend.

What happens?

Most likely you and your friend just stay in a corner and chat it up, which is great.

But if you do that too often, you also close new doors and new opportunities to meet new people.

Like I remember, I was so intimidated to go to brand events, and when I get invited to events.

They usually allow a plus one.

And when I would bring someone, I felt like I was keeping myself in that safe, comfortable feeling.

Which, you know, for my anxiety purposes, probably was good.

But if I'm looking to grow and develop as a person, it's actually better for me to be uncomfortable sometimes and go alone.

Which I've now started to go to events most of the time alone.

And I always meet new people.

Be the source of your own happiness instead of relying on others.

To do it for you.

And also too, it's really important to remember that you are the average of the five people you hang out with the most.

So really think about where you're spending your time and your energy.

The next thing I want to talk about is, I wish that I knew the importance of setting boundaries.

I honestly didn't even learn about setting boundaries until like two years ago.

One how to set boundaries effectively and two, why they actually were necessary.

Because a lot of times what happens is, especially when you grow up in a place where you're familiar with your family and your friends.

Like you don't even realize the importance of boundaries in the most important settings.

And you're going to constantly feel like you are putting others first instead of yourself.

Which will leave you feeling drained, exhausted, and you know, not reaching your potential as a human being.

So boundaries are super important because it allows you to protect your energy.

To protect your time, your peace.

It really protects your mental well-being.

I was a people pleaser.

I didn't even realize it, you know?

And I had this natural thing where I felt like I, I needed to fix people.

I needed to help people draining myself to be there for other people.

It created this unhealthy dynamic where I felt like I needed to show up for other people.

Even though I wasn't even showing up for myself.

And I know a lot of us can relate to this, because if we don't have boundaries.

That's just what's going to happen.

An example of setting boundaries would be a friend invites you to go somewhere and you do want to go.

But you know that if you go, it's going to leave you with less time to work on a project that you know is due.

And you're going to be scrambling at the end of the night.

Super stressed, staying up late.

And while that shows, yes, you are a good person and a good friend for trying to show up for other people.

That's where a boundary would come into place, because that's when you need to realize that.

By showing up as this point, to be at the expense of my own good, is this going to be more harmful or better for me?

Is this going to help support me, or is it going to drain me?

You know, you could say something like, thank you so much for inviting me.

Can we meet up another time?

Unfortunately, I'm just not able to today.

That's it.

You know, you just communicate your needs and what is best in your best interest before someone else's.

And the old crazier would be like, I feel so bad, I don't want to say no.

So I'm just going to go.

And then I would go.

Sometimes I would go so far to be there for someone, and it would just be at the expense of my own well-being.

And then sometimes these people would never even show up for me.

Another way that I like to set boundaries is by not being so easily available.

Having access to your energy should be a privilege.

And this isn't because in some egotistical way like I, my time is so precious.

It's more of like, you know, you are in control of your own time, your energy and your life.

And if you allow people to have access to you 24 over seven.

You're showing to yourself that you don't respect your own time.

I don't even have my notifications on for social media.

I'm not notified of anything when I get new likes, follows, comments, I personally had to set a boundary of when I can check on those things.

And without having to be constantly pulled to be notified every second of it.

Oh, this is a big one.

How important it is to have a lot of people call it an emergency fund.

But I've reframed that thought because I thought that felt kind of negative.

And I was like, I'm going to have a different name for this.

I'm going to call this my peace of mind fund, emergency fund, peace of mind fund, whatever you want to call it.

But having extra cash saved up on the side, it should be non-negotiable.

I understand it's not easy.

I would have never thought that I could have a peace of mind fund for myself.

Five years ago, I would have probably been like, well, it's easy.

For you to say because I'm working 12 hours a day.

Example, example, example.

Because that was literally my mindset before.

The longer we keep telling ourselves that story, the longer we're going to keep ourselves broke.

But what I can do.

I can save $5 every time I get paid.

And then bump it up to $20 every time I get paid.

Then maybe when I get an extra bonus, I can even do 200.

You know, you have to find what works for you.

But we need to start thinking about our future because no one's going to come save us.

If we don't take the action today, that's going to set us up for a better tomorrow.

Nobody will.

It's a harsh truth.

I have to be the one to tell you.

But do what you can to start prioritizing your life in the future.

I went through pretty much most of my early 20s working long hours at the time.

I had a job that was paying a little above, you know, minimum wage.

And to me, I was like, oh my gosh, I'm living many years working, you know, many jobs.

And I didn't save at all.

Of course, I've changed my life now.

I've changed my ways.

But if I had done that sooner, I'd be in a way, different position.

Make it something that you don't even have to think about.

If you have a direct deposit paycheck, automate a small payment out of your checking into a savings every month, and don't even look at it.

If possible, keep it in a different bank account so you just forget that it's even there.

But I ran some numbers for you because I wanted to give you this example.

To save $20,000 in five years, all you need to do is save $38.46 per week.

If I handed you $20,000 today, you'd probably take it and see it as a good amount of cash.

So if you start thinking that way, small habits lead up to big compound results.

While we're talking about money, this leads me to my next point.

Which this is a lesson I also wish I had weight earlier.

Probably even earlier than my 20s.

Money is energy.

Money is energy.

I need you to understand that it is nothing more than energy.

Money is an exchange of value.

You put in your time, you get money, you give your energy.

Then you receive energy.

It's truly just energy.

I would be scared to spend.

Like I would eventually do it on things I didn't need.

I realized that I didn't understand money being an energy, so I felt like I should hoard it.

I should keep it.

I should hang on to it as long as possible.

I should penny pinch.

But by doing that, you are blocking new abundance from coming into your life.

When energy is flowing, money, abundance, all of it is flowing.

So within reason, I promise you, if you start thinking freely about money.

In a way where, you know, not obviously be irresponsible and spend on things you don't need.

But like I've always found that when I do something useful and intense with my money, because I know it's going to continue this feeling of flow.

Invest in something that is going to make my content better.

Like by using the money with intention, I found that it always comes back and it always comes back in abundance.

It just constantly shows up.

I wish somebody would have told me that investing your money is just as important.

If not more important, than saving it.

Invest in things that could help you make more money.

That could help you grow as a person.

And it's never a waste of money.

Okay, the next lesson is the bit of a harsh truth, and I think sometimes people won't be ready to receive this one.

But it needs to be said because it was a harsh truth.

I didn't want to hear at first, but eventually I realized how important it was.

And that is, everything in your life is a reflection of who you are right now.

Of what you represent as a person.

If you're attracting, if you have a business and you're attracting customers who are not valuing you and are trying to get you to give them discounts.

That's a reflection of you.

Everything in your life is a mirror to who you are right now.

And I know that's hard to believe sometimes because you may think things like, oh, what could I have possibly done to attract this negative experience, this negative person?

But it's all a frequency that we are emitting to the world, to the universe.

That is attracting the same back to us.

Like attracts like.

I had to audit my life in a way where I realized, okay, if I don't like the relationships that I'm having in my life.

What does that say about where I'm at with myself?

The relationship with myself.

Once you understand that, you are way more aware of who you allow into your life.

What type of conversations you have.

Because you realize that you are going to attract exactly what you're giving out into the world.

That is no small thing.

Where your attention goes, energy flows.

So if you focus on positive things, if you're generally an optimistic person.

I can almost guarantee that your life attracts much more opportunity.

Than someone who's pessimistic and sees the negative in every situation.

It's just the universal law.

And that's why sometimes you will find yourself going from relationship to relationship or friendship to friendship.

And you're like, why do I keep attracting this situation into my life?

It's because you haven't yet learned the lesson and you haven't healed through the experience.

Your energy is still in the same place.

Therefore, it's going to attract the same thing in different circumstances.

The next thing is, I wish I was way more open to change.

You know, and I say this because I have this very clear idea of where I wanted to be by what age.

What accomplishments I wanted to have achieved by this time.

By not being flexible and open to change, you are closing so many doors.

Life is unexpected, you evolve and we are all just vessels of a higher source.

So whatever happens in our life, it's usually happening for a reason.

And the more that you resist change and the more that you resist things because just because it wasn't part of your plan.

It doesn't mean that it's not right.

It doesn't mean that the timing isn't right.

You just have to be more open and flexible to change.

We don't need to create timelines and deadlines for ourselves like that.

Things will happen when the timing is right.

And we are not always in control of the situation.

We have to trust that there's a bigger picture that we just can't see.

So don't make up unnecessary stress for yourself.

The next point that I want to talk about is one that I know someone needs to hear right now.

And it was also a harsh truth for myself, and is it's to stop trying to help people who don't want to be helped.

You know, this was a hard thing for me to accept for a long, long time because I felt like I needed to be the one in my family to save my whole family.

It was coming from an unhealthy space where I felt like I wanted, you know, I wanted to get my parents to see life in a different way.

Because they grew up completely different than me.

You know, they came from another country, and I wanted to be able to teach them things that I learned.

And I would share books with them that I read and being like, please, like try meditation, try this.

And although my intentions were good, they just were not healthy for anyone, for myself, for my family.

Or for anyone on the other end that I was really trying to fix or help.

And as it's because at the end of the day, everyone's on their unique path, and no matter how good your intentions are.

And no matter how right you are about something, people need to experience life on their own.

I can't convince someone to want different for themselves.

And I'm also not in the right place to do so.

We are all learning in our own way, and we're all living our own truths.

However, we're supposed to.

And I just needed to realize that.

And that was also distracting me from my own goals and my own purpose by thinking I needed to.

You know, fix someone else's life.

We have to allow ourselves to fully flourish, and whoever wants to come along on the journey will.

And if they don't, they won't.

We are down to the last thing, everyone.

This is the last one, and this is the number ten lesson that I wish I learned in my life way earlier in my early 20s.

And this one is pretty big.

You know, I didn't intentionally put this in any order.

But this one just felt right to close it out.

There is no end goal.

There is no one thing.

There is no one achievement that will give you the happy ending of life, the ultimate happiness.

Not even any amount of money in the world will will solve things in your life.

If you haven't healed yourself.

I know when you're in a position where you're maybe financially struggling.

You're like, well, it'd be easier to cry in a Rolls-Royce than it would be to cry without one.

And while I get that there is obviously, you know, money is going to give you a lot more flexibility and options.

The point I'm trying to make here is that at the end of the day, the magic is actually in the process.

It's in the journey.

And you will often hear a lot of people say, like, for example, even big celebrities.

I've watched so many interviews, success, successful business owners.

They always say this thing where, you know, they almost feel like they were happier.

Before they got their achievements.

And I wondered why that was right.

And the thing is, sometimes we, we are so focused on where we're trying to go on the destination.

That we overlook all the little things along the way.

Don't overlook the present moment by being too focused on the future.

You know, being present is really the gift.

That's why they call it the present.

In the last year have been so focused on just being so grateful and the present moment that it really does manifest bigger into your life.

So there's no point in being stuck in the past and regretting things.

And there's no point in over worrying about the future.

If you just try to find the feeling of joy today.

Life becomes so easy.

I hope that you can apply these and learn from my lessons and my mistakes so that you can have an amazing 20s if you're in your 20s.

And if you enjoy this video, I think you'll enjoy these videos right here.

See you in the next video.

Bye.