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Why Is Everyone Running In Rom-Coms?

Explores why rom-coms feature dramatic running scenes as a metaphor for the modern quest for meaningful love and life.

Key Takeaways

  • The running trope in rom-coms symbolizes the modern human quest for meaningful love and life.
  • Modernity shifted meaning-making from cosmic order to individual narrative quests.
  • Romantic love is a cultural invention that offers psychological grounding and fulfillment.
  • Romantic comedies simplify complex emotional realities into comforting fantasies.
  • These fantasies help people cope with the ambiguity and challenges of modern life.

What the video covers

  • Romantic comedies often end with a character running to profess love, a trope that externalizes internal emotional drama.
  • This trope reflects a deep human desire for meaning and fulfillment in life, not necessarily reality.
  • The decline of a cosmic moral order around 1700 shifted the burden of meaning-making onto individuals.
  • The novel emerged as a storytelling form focusing on individual quests for meaning and identity.
  • Romantic love became a modern cultural invention and a way to find psychological grounding and life significance.
  • Love existed before modernity, but its role as central to a meaningful life is a modern development.
  • Romantic comedies and novels simplify complex realities into a comforting fantasy of clear, linear quests for love.
  • The fantasy offers certainty and fulfillment in a confusing, ambiguous modern world.
  • Despite complexities and doubts in real life, these fantasies provide emotional comfort and hope.
  • The video concludes by acknowledging the value of such fantasies while recognizing the challenges of modernity.

Answers

Questions about this video

Why do romantic comedies often show characters running to confess love?

This trope externalizes the intense internal emotions of love, making the feeling cinematic and symbolizing a deep human desire for meaningful connection and fulfillment.

How did the concept of romantic love as central to life’s meaning develop?

Around the 1700s, as traditional cosmic moral frameworks declined, individuals began seeking meaning through personal narratives, with romantic love emerging as a modern cultural invention offering psychological grounding.

Does the video suggest romantic love is the only way to find meaning?

No, the video acknowledges multiple paths to fulfillment such as religion, work, and community, but highlights romantic love as a powerful and culturally significant way to achieve a sense of meaning.

Full Transcript — Download SRT & Markdown

00:01
Speaker A
There are some storytelling tropes that are so cliché that you just know they speak to something deep inside us. Take this one. The trope that happens at the end of so many romantic comedies of someone dashing through an airport,
00:15
Speaker A
train station, or city street to profess their love to someone else before it's too late. Does this happen in real life?
00:22
Speaker A
I mean, I'm sure it does sometimes. People, of course, profess their love all the time, though usually it's not so dramatic or kinetic, I should say.
00:31
Speaker A
Every profession of romantic love is dramatic. It's just that the drama is happening inside. This trope externalizes those interior fireworks, which is to say, it makes the feeling cinematic. But, you know, it doesn't really matter if these mad dashes are
00:47
Speaker A
happening in real life. The trope isn't so much a reflection of reality as it is a reflection or projection of a deep desire that exists in all of us. In romcoms, that desire takes the form of true love. But at its core, it's a
01:01
Speaker A
desire for meaning, for a meaningful life. In the modern day, we live in a world without a cosmic moral order, a framework of meaning to which everyone automatically subscribes. We had one for a while. But round about the year 1700,
01:16
Speaker A
give or take a century, that framework started cracking, fragmenting, losing its authority, and the burden of finding meaning shifted onto individuals. We all became desperate seekers in a confusing and disjointed world. It's no coincidence that this shift roughly
01:34
Speaker A
coincides with the emergence of the novel as a form of storytelling. In a profoundly new way. The novel concerned itself with individuals, ordinary individuals, their internal motivations, their inner lives, their ability to overcome obstacles to achieve a goal.
01:50
Speaker A
Novels both reflected and shaped the way modern people saw their identities as narratives, as stories with a beginning, middle, and end, as quests for meaning.
01:59
Speaker A
As Alistair MacIntyre writes, "The unity of a human life is the unity of a narrative quest." And what's the grail for this quest? It's fulfillment. The sense of living a full and meaningful life. You can get that in lots of ways.
02:13
Speaker A
Religion, work, community, charity, art, parenthood. But around this time, culture, with the help of the novel, invented another way, one that was theoretically, if not practically, open to everybody. Romantic love. Now, did love exist before modernity? Yes. Did
02:29
Speaker A
people feel overwhelming romantic affection before modernity? Of course they did. What changes, writes Charles Taylor, is not that people begin feeling affection for their spouses, but that these dispositions come to be seen as a crucial part of what makes life worthy
02:43
Speaker A
and significant. The other, by being who he or she is, answers a lack, and this lack is directly to do with self-identity. In some sense, the flawed individual is made whole. Or to put that Anthony Giddens quote another way,
02:58
Speaker A
you complete me. And so in the 1800s, there's an explosion of romantic novels. And in the following century, romantic comedy films. These films, like those novels, are not always or even usually that sophisticated. But fantasies of this kind don't have to be to work. They work
03:20
Speaker A
because romantic love, this product, this invention of modernity, works. It can be a strong anchor in a confusing and disjointed world. A way of feeling psychologically grounded. A way of giving your life real meaning. Is it the only way? No. Are there complexities?
03:37
Speaker A
Obviously, yes. But the fantasy is allergic to complexity. In the fantasy, the goal is simple, singular, and the achievement of that goal is all that matters. There is just something deeply comforting about seeing people on a quest for love run in straight lines
03:54
Speaker A
toward meaning that they're absolutely certain of. In reality, lines are never so straight. There are no lines. We stumble and spiral, haunted by doubt and ambivalence. That's the curse of modernity. Or maybe that's too harsh.
04:09
Speaker A
It's the challenge of modernity. And while we all face it, who can begrudge us a few fantasies here and there?
04:26
Speaker A
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Speaker A
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Speaker A
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05:00
Speaker A
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05:09
Speaker A
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Topics:romantic comedyrom-com tropemodernitymeaning of liferomantic lovestorytellingnarrative identityfilm analysisNerdwriter1cultural history

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