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הרב יצחק פנגר | חג סוכות 2026 - זמן של ישועות ושמחה!

Rabbi Yitzchak Panger discusses the significance of Sukkot as a time of joy and shares personal reflections on faith and celebration.

Key Takeaways

  • Joy is a central and challenging commandment of Sukkot, requiring continuous effort.
  • Sukkot’s timing and rituals are deeply connected to other major Jewish festivals, highlighting themes of freedom and divine protection.
  • The Torah’s commandments are designed to be achievable by everyone, including youth and imperfect individuals.
  • Personal reflection and disconnection can help deepen spiritual experience and joy during the holiday.
  • Community and gratitude play important roles in celebrating and understanding Sukkot.

What the video covers

  • Rabbi Panger opens with personal anecdotes about planning a solitary retreat to disconnect and recharge.
  • He explains the unique subtitle of Sukkot as the 'Time of our Rejoicing' and why joy is considered the hardest commandment in the Torah.
  • The connection between Sukkot and other Jewish holidays occurring on the 15th of the month, such as Passover, is explored.
  • Rabbi Panger contrasts the intense preparations of Passover with the joyful obligations of Sukkot.
  • He emphasizes that the Torah’s commandments, including joy, are attainable by all, not just perfect individuals.
  • The lecture touches on the spiritual symbolism of the Four Species and their representation of human qualities.
  • Rabbi Panger highlights the importance of maintaining joy and faith even amidst personal challenges and crises.
  • He shares insights on how to cultivate joy during Sukkot and the broader lessons it offers for life.
  • The talk includes gratitude towards the event organizers and participants, underscoring community involvement.
  • Throughout, Rabbi Panger blends humor, personal stories, and Torah wisdom to engage the audience.

Answers

Questions about this video

Why is joy considered the hardest commandment during Sukkot?

Rabbi Panger explains that being joyful continuously for the entire eight days of Sukkot is extremely challenging because life inevitably presents difficulties, but the Torah mandates this joy, making it a profound spiritual exercise.

How is Sukkot connected to other Jewish holidays?

Sukkot occurs on the 15th of Tishrei, paralleling Passover which is also on the 15th of Nisan. Both holidays share themes of divine protection and freedom, and have similar ritual structures, such as the Four Species on Sukkot and the Four Sons on Passover.

What advice does Rabbi Panger give for experiencing joy during Sukkot?

He suggests that joy is attainable by all, including imperfect individuals, and encourages personal reflection, disconnecting from daily stress, and embracing the holiday’s spiritual lessons to cultivate genuine happiness.

Full Transcript — Download SRT & Markdown

00:00
Speaker A
We want air conditioning. Okay, good evening to everyone. Let’s start with some thank yous. First of all, credit to Amos. He once organized a class for me. I’ll tell you how it went: there wasn't supposed to be a
00:17
Speaker A
class today. It’s just that in Sukkot, like, tomorrow night, my neighbor, it’s my birthday, like, yes, thank you, thank you, man. I needed it before, not now, it’s too late now. So anyway, I was debating what to buy
00:29
Speaker A
myself as a real gift. I was tired of waiting for everyone, come on, if I am not for me, who is for me? I said this year I’m booking a cabin for myself, yes, go ahead and look, I’m not
00:39
Speaker A
waiting for anyone, not looking for flight approvals, so to speak, not looking for anything, going alone. I told my kids: What do you want to buy Dad for a gift? A cabin? Don’t buy me a cabin, I mean I’ll buy that myself,
00:52
Speaker A
okay, God willing, but the idea, you know, arrange something cool for me, I want some nature or desert, throw me into something, I want it isolated, want something alone with myself, I need some quality time with myself, so
01:04
Speaker A
to speak, I want to do some work with myself, I feel like disconnecting from the world, find me something disconnected. Now this happened, like, it was what, a week ago, a week, even less than a week. I just have to, I’m
01:17
Speaker A
moody, I get these impulses, I have to share. So I called the kids: Listen guys, look for a cabin to buy me, I want to disconnect. Anyway, we planned it for Thursday. Planned Thursday, I’m clearing everything, no lectures,
01:30
Speaker A
nothing. Come on, Thursday I go, disconnect, tomorrow I return, let’s get to work. Anyway, they searched and told me: Dad, you’re cute, we love you, did you remember to look for once among all the available ones? You want
01:42
Speaker A
it? There’s some cabin, but not what you’re looking for, if you want to disconnect and all that, everything is booked. They searched and searched until today. Today my oldest son calls and says: Dad, listen, let it go, okay,
01:55
Speaker A
let’s book it for you, God willing, let it go. I said: No problem, no problem. I just got back from Channel 14, we had something they needed to film there. I call Amos, because for me there’s no such thing as a day
02:06
Speaker A
without work, I can’t, I can’t, I have to do something with my life. I can’t just be at home, like, what?
02:14
Speaker A
Why bother people for nothing? I have to do something. I asked Amos: Amos, come on, let’s put on a lecture, do you want us to put on a lecture? He tells me: Okay. Now I’m telling you, I’m impulsive, meaning I have urges
02:25
Speaker A
and then I’m like: What did you need that for? It's cool, forget it, you have a day off, enjoy it, let go. Call him after about fifteen minutes: Amos, listen, if it doesn't work out. He says: Like, I'm responsible for the world,
02:41
Speaker A
I need to take care of it, and you're just throwing cases at people. So that's it, first of all, thanks for coming, I was sitting here alone and Amos was already stressed at the beginning, thinking nobody would show
02:52
Speaker A
up. So, kudos to Amos, to Asaf and Marsha who also pitched in, really kudos to everyone, and to Liran, dear Liran, and to the whole team working here, and especially to you. So that's it, thank you and that's it, we can end
03:06
Speaker A
the ceremony here. Uh, let's talk about some things regarding Sukkot. Okay? Sukkot is truly one of the most interesting holidays in the Jewish calendar. Because every holiday, if you look in the prayer book, has some kind of subtitle. For example, Passover is
03:21
Speaker A
the "Time of our Freedom." Understand? Okay? On Passover, we went out to freedom, cool. What about Shavuot, the three pilgrimage festivals, right? So Shavuot is the "Time of the Giving of our Torah." Okay, that subtitle makes sense to me. Why? On the holiday of
03:33
Speaker A
Shavuot, we received the Torah. Cool. Sukkot's subtitle. I would expect "Time of our Sukkot," I don't know, what is that? What's the subtitle? The title is "Time of our Rejoicing." What does that have to do with anything, Dad? It's a
03:45
Speaker A
great commandment to always be in joy, why is Sukkot specifically the "Time of our Rejoicing"? Come on, like, what, is that the subtitle? Go to a copywriter, have them give you something else. But the holiday, the holiday about which it
03:59
Speaker A
is said: "And you shall be happy," is Sukkot. And the Vilna Gaon, who was, meaning a person of higher status, said this is the hardest commandment in the Torah. Ask people on the street: "What is the hardest commandment in the Torah
04:10
Speaker A
in your opinion?" Everyone will throw something at you, I don't know what, "Oh, keeping the covenant, Rabbi," or "Shabbat, Rabbi." What's so hard? The commandment of joy is the hardest. Why?
04:21
Speaker A
Because if I take it now as a, per excellence, great commandment to always be in joy—it's cute, it's a song, it's nothing, it's not a binding obligation. On Sukkot, I have a binding obligation to be happy for seven days,
04:33
Speaker A
net, including Simchat Torah afterwards, that's eight days of being happy 24/7. Listen, the Vilna Gaon said: This is the hardest commandment in the Torah.
04:46
Speaker A
How can you be happy for eight days without getting annoyed? Without eight minutes I can manage, God willing, even eight hours seems a bit much to me. Uh, how is it possible for eight hours that I won't have something that triggers me?
05:01
Speaker A
If I sleep, if I sleep I can pull off eight hours of joy, fine. Even if you're chilling or smoking something, how long does that high last without, like you know, fine, after two or three hours you already start bothering
05:12
Speaker A
something. How is eight days possible? It's inconceivable. But a rule: if the Torah mandates it, it is possible, and the Torah was not given to those perfect types, you know, angels; it is for a 13-year-old boy, a 12-year-old
05:25
Speaker A
girl—in other words, reach higher. So if the Torah mandates it, it is possible. The question is, how can one really do it? How is it possible? Is it possible to be joyful? So we will talk about a few points; it is not our
05:36
Speaker A
subject right now, it truly needs study, but let’s touch on a few points that might help us introduce a bit more joy into our lives. First point: The Sages say that Sukkot is on the 15th of the month. If you look at the Hebrew
05:48
Speaker A
calendar, then the 1st of Tishrei was Rosh Hashanah, the 10th of Tishrei is Yom Kippur, and the 15th of Tishrei, the middle of the month, is Sukkot. Is there another holiday on the 15th, which holiday? Tu BiShvat. Correct,
06:03
Speaker A
correct, nice, correct, Tu B'Av, nice, correct. But the main holiday, which is also one of the three pilgrimage festivals like Passover—Passover is also on the 15th—that is how we know it: Tu BiShvat, Tu B'Av, you know the
06:15
Speaker A
"Tu," the 15th, 15th, 15th. But for Passover, it is also the 15th of the month, these are two holidays that are very parallel. Passover has the Exodus from Egypt and such, and Sukkot is when we were in the desert and the Holy One,
06:27
Speaker A
Blessed be He, surrounded us with the Clouds of Glory. These are the two main festivals, the 15th and 15th. Therefore, there is a thing called in the Torah a "gezeira shava" (equal category), we learn from one to the other, and
06:37
Speaker A
seemingly they are two different worlds. You see there are the Four Species on Sukkot, there are the Four Sons on Passover, four cups, there are a great many similar things. Therefore, just as there is a commandment to eat Matzah on
06:48
Speaker A
Passover, there is a commandment to eat bread on Sukkot, but in the Sukkah. Great, so the two holidays are very similar but really different. What do I mean? On Passover, you will see all kinds of stringencies like that, all
06:59
Speaker A
kinds of general craziness in the world, cleaning the leaven and searching for it by candlelight. Like, come to a Haredi city once, like on Passover, it's like madness, madness, searching, replacing the toilets any second, like I don’t know what, a hallucination,
07:14
Speaker A
like. Adorable, it’s beautiful to see that, I get moved by it. Women clean for a month, men too, like we help. To get out of the house and lift our legs so. Just kidding, Heaven forbid my wife sees me, "Come, come home," "I'm coming,"
07:29
Speaker A
"Don't tell me what you're doing." I do
07:43
Speaker A
please," I already know what she wants. With God's help. Anyway, why am I saying this? Because seemingly Passover is strict, whereas Sukkot is more freestyle, bro. Sukkah, push whatever walls you want, make a wall out of pipes, out of iron, out of wood, make
07:59
Speaker A
it out of strings. There’s a hack, let’s call it "Levud-Levud," what does that mean? You need, you need two walls, at least three. You see, some people use strings, three strings, it’s like a design choice, but honestly, three strings? You’re
08:12
Speaker A
cutting corners on me, brother, I can walk right through, what, what’s going on here? In Sukkot, there are a lot of leniencies like that, so, what, no need to go buying things now. Either you want, go buy one for 200 bucks, I
08:23
Speaker A
don't know, a kit, they call it, but just leaves, just leaves, push leaves, some palm tree branches, push them up, and it's wonderful. In Sukkot, you’ll see lots of cutting corners, as they say. Why? What’s the difference? Why
08:35
Speaker A
is Passover so different from Sukkot? Brother, just show up, just show up, they say in the Hasidic world, come in your boots, even with your mud, just come in. And this is the only commandment where we are entirely
08:46
Speaker A
inside the commandment. All other commandments: if I put on Tefillin, then my hand is sanctified, okay; I don't know, if I eat something, then the mouth, the stomach. The Sukkah is the only commandment where I go entirely inside it. It means, like a
09:01
Speaker A
Mikvah, so to speak. I go entirely into the Sukkah and now for seven days I am in a different atmosphere. The difference is that our sages explain that on Passover we invite the Creator to us. Come to my house. So the house
09:15
Speaker A
must be polished, inviting the King, so to speak. The house must be perfect. Everything clean. The nicest dishes and beauty. In Sukkot, I come to the King.
09:23
Speaker A
I come to the Holy One, blessed be He. And if I come to the Holy One, He says, listen, just come. Just come with your mess, with whoever you are, come as you are, I’ll arrange all the accommodations in the world, just come.
09:37
Speaker A
That’s the first point. The first point for us to know is that according to Judaism, I, not just me, but I think most people I talk to, you think of God , they think of God like a policeman.
09:50
Speaker A
Don’t get into trouble with Him, brother. He’ll catch you in a corner, hit you with a curveball. Sorry to say, I have no problem with Him being a policeman or whatever you want. But beyond that, first of all, He is a
10:00
Speaker A
father who loves me. He is a father who loves me. Okay? And that is the Jewish perspective, that the Creator truly loves us. And that is why you see that even Rosh Hashanah, which is a scary Judgment Day. We talked about it here,
10:09
Speaker A
there isn't even a mention of sins on Rosh Hashanah. God revealed to us that we have a Day of Judgment. And like, what is judgment? It’s not that He judges me and looks for my faults, He doesn't even need a Day of Judgment, He
10:18
Speaker A
could have caught me in the corner, but God says, listen, I want what's best for you. Let’s look at what you did to see how we can improve. Think about the fact that He loves me. He wants what is best for me. He sits with me
10:28
Speaker A
regarding what I did this year: Let's see how we can improve, how we can succeed in an even better year. The same goes for Yom Kippur, He atones for my sins. He washed me, the Creator of the world cleansed me, I feel light.
10:39
Speaker A
With His grace, He took away the whole weight of the nonsense. Meaning, God truly comes towards you. This is the true Jewish perspective. Of course there is, one must also have fear of punishment, fear of heaven, but like a
10:50
Speaker A
King that I serve, like my father. You know what? Today I’m not afraid of my father, right? What is it, as a child?
10:57
Speaker A
Like, wow, if my father gives me two slaps I’m afraid, but I'm not afraid of my father, I fear him out of respect , I appreciate him. Do you understand?
11:05
Speaker A
It’s my father, he tells me a word. It’s my father, not because he’ll hit me. Hitting me is simple, that’s not the level. Do you understand?
11:12
Speaker A
It’s about how I value the person, I value the person and therefore I accept from him, therefore I fear him, I don’t want to hurt him, I don’t want him to be angry at me. On that level, the idea of Sukkot is a holiday
11:22
Speaker A
of love. That is why it comes immediately after Yom Kippur. Why after Yom Kippur? Listen, come again to the ultra-Orthodox neighborhoods next year, I’ll show you, it’s an experience.
11:30
Speaker A
Why? Because Yom Kippur is a day of pressure, I mean, what is it, pressure during the prayers, Ne'ila and the end of the night, pressure. You come home, brother, dinner, within an hour or two you start hearing the Sukkot [
11:44
Speaker A
preparations]. You say: What? What are we doing with you? Get up, get up, get up, as fast as you can, don't stay stuck in soul-searching, you know, in your sins, in your faults, get up, get up, boom, go build a Sukkah, the
11:57
Speaker A
happiest holiday, "And you shall be joyful." Great, that's the work, to move on quickly, quickly, quickly. Even if you had some crisis, and again each of us has our own crises, guys: get up, as you say, and leave the house, leave
12:10
Speaker A
the house! And here this brings us to the second stage: to truly reach joy, I must leave my permanent dwelling. The true law, whoever wants to go, like, hardcore, then we leave the house. Come to my house, there is no house on
12:22
Speaker A
Sukkot! No house, there is a house that I don't enter at all, at all. I don't have a bathroom in the Sukkah, so I go home, right, but I sleep in the Sukkah, I eat in the Sukkah, everything is in
12:31
Speaker A
the Sukkah, I move to live in the Sukkah. I am now moving house for seven days, the living room table is in the Sukkah, my bed is in the Sukkah. I live on the ground floor so I have a big
12:40
Speaker A
Sukkah, I will go live there. No house, leave your permanent dwelling, move to a temporary one. And this is a seven-day concept where I make a switch in my head, because most of my life's problems are about permanence, it's the
12:53
Speaker A
need for permanence. What does that mean? It means you want everything to be permanent, you want everything to be organized for you, secure, you want to feel at home. That’s nice, but life isn't like that. Life is very
13:06
Speaker A
challenging, life is very challenging, nothing is permanent. Ah, how is the lesson going? No, not secure.
13:13
Speaker A
Yossi. How is nothing permanent? Known. Not known. Nothing is known. No, no. True. Well, but what was before?
13:22
Speaker A
Nothing is permanent. No. Known. Nothing is known. That's also good, it's the same idea. No. It means that if a person really wants to live happily in life, most of what ruins my happiness is my fixations. I hold onto
13:40
Speaker A
something, and then if something is shaken up, you don't know how to find yourself. Like now, my wife nagged me, or your husband is like this, or work is like that. What happened? What happened? That's life. An American once
13:54
Speaker A
told me, he brought me a candy, Hershey's, you know, Hershey's Kisses. He tells me: You should know, this Milton Hershey in 1876. He was 20 years old, opening a candy factory, wanted to open a sweets shop, tries and tries,
14:12
Speaker A
takes out loans, people believe in him, a young entrepreneur, go go go. Six years, you know, sleeping under the counter in his shop, pouring his soul into it, he failed, nothing worked out.
14:25
Speaker A
After six years he closed the business, bankruptcy, everyone who lent him money said, I’m never lending you money again. He went to New York, he went to New York to try and see what he could do. Opened a new business there. It
14:40
Speaker A
didn't succeed either, to the point where he wanted to return to the town he grew up in. He didn't even have money for transport from New York, like he returned with his tail between his legs. I would say that after 10 years
14:53
Speaker A
already, you're 30, two businesses failed you, you should just close the shop, go be an employee, grow bananas.
15:00
Speaker A
He decides: What happened? I'll continue, it's fine, two failures, it’s okay. He opens his third business, at first it was caramel and then he upgraded to chocolate, and that's it, here the Holy One Blessed be He shines success on him and the rest
15:16
Speaker A
is history. The strongest brand of chocolate today in the United States, Hershey's. And then that American told me: You should know, today's punch can turn into tomorrow's kiss. Remember, today's punch. He told me Hershey's Kisses, like Hershey's kisses, so he
15:35
Speaker A
says to me, today's punch can become tomorrow's kiss. Provided you keep going, provided you don't give up, provided you don't start self-flagellating—Yom Kippur style again—getting all stressed and depressed, beating yourself up, thinking, "Look what I’ve done, sins again," and how, how, how, how. Get up,
15:54
Speaker A
get up, something new. But clearly, understand that everything is clear; that’s the second point: everything is clear. The third thing: every holiday in Judaism is characterized, as we said, by our connection with the Creator of the world. So it goes like
16:06
Speaker A
this: the Days of Awe, God sees us— now this is beautiful—He sees me. What is known as, "No, I don't see you, " but He sees you—that's the Days of Awe. There is Passover, He speaks to me . Passover, God speaks to me, nice,
16:19
Speaker A
cool. Shavuot, that’s already a kiss; our Sages say "let Him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth," meaning something that gave the Torah, so to speak, His words—it’s like a kiss. So we have sight, we have speech, we have a kiss.
16:33
Speaker A
Sukkot is a hug; that’s why, if you look at the holiday of Sukkot, it’s called the walls of the Sukkah, like a hug—two walls and a handbreadth; that’s the laws of the Sukkah, exactly like a hug. Ask any child what
16:48
Speaker A
you prefer from Mom or Dad: a look, words, a kiss, or a hug? A hint: If they are looking at me, I...I don't know how they are looking at me, honestly, like, "What do you want from me?" Let's say my mother or my wife,
17:06
Speaker A
it's classic; if you stared at me, I'd get stressed, "What, what, what happened?" Okay, she’s talking to me, God willing, well, it depends on what she's saying. A kiss? Forget it, you know? Also, children did it like this.
17:21
Speaker A
How, how, how, how? Not the vibe, not the vibe, doesn't fit. Everyone, there are those, you know? Even if they are criminals or whatever, among the Arabs, they come to...there is this kiss. It doesn't show you really love me, not
17:35
Speaker A
really. The most real thing, so to speak, is a hug. There is something in the connection. Look, I’ll tell you, I work with struggling youth, delinquent types. I arrived, it stinks.
17:47
Speaker A
Listen, I come to give them a lecture, but they are listening. I’m like, " Hello, hello, are you with me, brother?
17:56
Speaker A
" There are all kinds of things there, all kinds of things without seeing an inch ahead. When I come home, my wife says to me, "Where were you?" Come on, dog, this, that, flying, or or or, like , you understand? But you see all these
18:14
Speaker A
delinquents, the troublemakers, and they want a hug, a connection. There is something in a hug that nothing else has. I remember that during COVID, when we weren't allowed to touch people, you know, all these strange things, so you
18:26
Speaker A
understand? It was, what’s called, hard. I remember I flew to the United States, it was still really at the tail end of COVID, I flew abroad and you know, things hadn't really started yet, you could already touch people, so I
18:39
Speaker A
saw some American walking with a sign: Free Hugs, Free Hugs. I thought, how bizarre, Americans, honestly, like, who’s going to hug you? Look, you look...and honestly, nobody went near him, nobody approached him, and he’s walking with a sign like that: Free
18:52
Speaker A
Hugs, Free Hugs, looking so cute with that look, and then I said: You know what? I’m going to him, I’m going to him, I went to him, I went to...like , he hugged me, and I tell you, he
19:02
Speaker A
wouldn't let go, and I’m like: Okay bro, we’re done, let go, yes, but the truth is I started to cry. We both started crying, we had tears in our eyes. Listen, it did something, how can I explain this to you? We stayed in
19:15
Speaker A
touch until today. Just kidding, relax, but there is something about a hug, so on Sukkot, the Creator of the world hugs me. And that is the perspective.
19:27
Speaker A
Especially when we’re having a hard time, that’s what we look for the most. Give me a hug, give me a hug, give, feel me, feel me. Some like to say, after all, the heart is the most important organ in a person.
19:39
Speaker A
Theoretically, in Judaism, the right side is more important than the left: " From His right hand a fiery law unto them," right is always that. It’s a stronger side in Judaism than the left —also in elections, kidding. But—
19:55
Speaker A
the right in Judaism is the stronger side. So why is the heart on the side it is? Since most of the heart is on the left, did God get a bit confused?
20:07
Speaker A
Like, it should have been on the right. But when you come to hug someone, then the person standing in front of me, where is the large part of my heart?
20:16
Speaker A
For them, it's on the right side, you understand? So the idea is, on the contrary: come and connect, connect to each other, connect to each other, connect your heart to their heart.
20:26
Speaker A
That’s why I once heard this from an elderly man, he told me: Why do people shout when they argue? Why do people shout when they argue? You see, there are those pictures of two people standing right in front of each other
20:36
Speaker A
shouting, and they are right here, it’s not like they are far away...no, they are standing right in front of each other screaming. What’s the point? You’re standing right in front of me, talk to me bro, talk to me! So
20:46
Speaker A
he said that although they are topographically, let's call it that, close, their hearts are very distant, which is why they shout. To you I say, remember this and remember it always: that when we shout, something is hurting us. When does a person shout?
21:02
Speaker A
When they are in pain. Okay, they’re in pain, they’re in pain. And you can say it’s not justified, or it is justified. If someone yells at you, they are hurting, she is hurting, and behind that anger, behind that
21:16
Speaker A
frustration, there is an emotion, a need, some kind of insult. Don't take what people say to you personally. I know it doesn't sound right, like, excuse me, do you know what he said to me? I don't want to repeat it on the
21:30
Speaker A
air here, God forbid. G, G, you continue by yourself. So I’m telling you, and I’ll be open with you: no matter what, even me—as much as I supposedly, you know, I even have a school for emotional management— brother, listen, I sometimes ask myself
21:47
Speaker A
questions. What does my wife call it? " His secular side came out, his secular side came out," oh my, oh my. Listen, but only she can, only my wife, the best in the world, I'm the dust at her
22:00
Speaker A
feet, she says that to me too, but only she knows how to push me to the edge.
22:05
Speaker A
Listen, No, it’s not, it’s not, I’m telling you. I deal with life, there are all sorts of things, but she has a certificate in it. I’m telling you, she is the only one in the world who knows how to bring me, like, come
22:17
Speaker A
on, come on, come on, come on, a little more, a little more, just a bit more.
22:21
Speaker A
You understand? And you're sure: that's it, I think. You're in a groove and it just can't be. Ah, God willing, I’ll show you what that is. When you think you're at some level, you think you’re already an expert? That’s
22:36
Speaker A
why I say: both things are true. On one hand, everyone in our lives is actually our trainer. We really do come to learn , we come to improve, we come to advance, but on the other hand, if someone snaps, they said something,
22:50
Speaker A
okay, don't take it personally. After all, later on he or she will apologize 700 times and really mean the apology.
22:58
Speaker A
He doesn't just say it, she doesn't just say it, something was hurting them . Okay? They were frustrated with something. You just happened to be there. Okay? Don't hold it against the person. I’m saying this intentionally for all of us because it is the day of
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Speaker A
the embrace. After all, what is Yom Kippur? It's a day when the Creator of the world actually forgives us for all our screw-ups. Okay? And not like "I forgave you and goodbye, leave me alone ." Like "I need a few years to get over
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Speaker A
you, you too, don't come near me." He doesn't say that to you; he tells you, "Now it's after the holiday, let's go build a Sukkah," we are going together, to be together. Let’s learn from this , on one hand, if we hurt someone—
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Speaker A
don’t expect that if you ask for forgiveness, then they’ll say: "Okay, I forgave, as you said, come, hug, forget about me, move on." That won't happen, because we are human. And the moment we hurt someone, usually the attempts at fixing it are minimal. You
23:51
Speaker A
hurt someone so badly, and then you say sorry. Now, even if you show me—no, sorry, you get on the floor, kiss my feet—that’s nothing, too. My subconscious tells me: don’t believe him, don’t believe him, because this isn’t the first time he’s hurt you.
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Speaker A
And so, I’m afraid to be hurt again. You, the subconscious, lowers a screen for me; I want to protect myself, okay?
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Speaker A
I’m not taking any risks. So don't expect that the person you hurt—no matter who it is: parents, wife, husband, children, it doesn't matter— if we hurt someone, don't expect that the other person, just because you asked for forgiveness (and I understand
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Speaker A
it's hard to ask for forgiveness and kudos for doing it), will immediately go back to acting like nothing happened . I don’t want to scare the men here, especially regarding women. According to our Sages, the first man was created
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Speaker A
from the earth: "From dust you came, to dust you shall return." Go to the beach , take a stick, draw a line on the ground, okay? That’s the dust; draw a line—tomorrow you won’t see any difference, everything is fine. The
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Speaker A
woman was created from the rib, in a certain measure from the bone. A bone that breaks never goes back to what it once was. Fine, even if you heal the pain and everything is good, it’s fine, you can still see some kind of
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Speaker A
crack. Meaning, don’t expect that after you’ve hurt me, or no matter what you do—daddy, yes, you shouldn't expect it either. The Rabbi said that you should be like sand. Come, come sand, sand and there’s nothing to eat , okay sweetie? There’s no getting
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Speaker A
along with others, not with you, okay my dear, that already becomes mud, mud. Just as an idea, don’t try to educate others, do me a favor, it doesn’t work. Let’s try to work on ourselves.
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Speaker A
That is why the embrace of this Sukkot holiday is critical, it is important, especially if I am ready to leave my permanent dwelling and understand that everything is temporary. So let’s look at the world as temporary; success is temporary, but failures are also
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Speaker A
temporary, even the hurt is temporary. Take things more easily. May it be the will that we do this the right way and then there is something called...
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Speaker A
Simchat Beit HaShoeivah. What is Simchat Beit HaShoeivah? All the days of Sukkot, during the time of the Temple, they would ascend to the Temple —to the Holy Temple, to the Temple Mount—and they would draw water from the Shiloach spring. And there is
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Speaker A
something special called the water libation: in the same way they offered sacrifices back then, they would pour wine, but on the holiday of Sukkot—it is, this is the holiday of water, so to speak, they poured water. And it was a
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Speaker A
huge celebration, they call it the celebration of the water drawing, when they draw the water. And they would simply dance there, celebrating whole nights without stopping, and they would really receive prophecy. For example, Jonah the prophet—uh...let’s read about Jonah, it’s with the...I’m
26:24
Speaker A
stuck on the pronunciation, okay, it’s him, his name is Jonah ben Amittai. He received a prophecy during the Simchat Beit HaShoeivah. He was a regular, standard person, he arrived at the Simchat Beit HaShoeivah, and it taught us that one of the requirements
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Speaker A
for prophecy is joy. A person who is sad—there’s no chance for... prophecy, no chance. He must be in a state of joy, a high level of joy, and then, like a zap, the Holy Spirit rests upon him. And therefore, prophecy does
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Speaker A
not, does not, does not rest except through joy; the Sages say: the joy of a commandment. Jonah ben Amittai goes up to the Temple Mount, receives a prophecy, and then he becomes a prophet , and here God sends him on all the
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Speaker A
missions, whether it’s, uh, Nineveh, as you know, it’s beautiful. Why am I telling you this? Because one of the things the Gemara says, I will read the Gemara to you—the Gemara says that during the Simchat Beit HaShoeivah, the
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Speaker A
pious and men of action would dance with eight torches of light. What does that mean? The great ones of Israel— don’t tell me these are just some jugglers, you know, doing...the great ones of Israel would play, there are
27:18
Speaker A
knives...there are those with cups of wine, with eggs, they would take eight, specifically eight, eight, eight torches, and would play with them, tick-tack, tick, doing juggling, the great ones of Israel. Now, what is their point? Excuse me, are you
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Speaker A
listening? Like, there is obviously a very deep lesson here: why specifically wine? Why specifically eggs? Why specifically knives? Every single thing characterizes something that you must learn to juggle with in life. Alright, all of life is juggling, all of life is
27:42
Speaker A
catching a ball, throwing a ball, catching a ball, throwing a ball. We have plenty of balls in life: there is the ball of relationships, and the ball of work, and the ball of family, and the ball of children, and the ball of
27:53
Speaker A
...the ball of hobbies. You have many balls, you must learn to play with them all. Play with them all. There is no single ball more important than the other in principle. But the wisdom is knowing how to play with them all.
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Speaker A
Knowing how to throw one and catch another. Meaning that when you catch the ball, be with it. Now you are with the family, be with the family. Now if you are with the parents, be with the parents, with the wife, with the wife,
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Speaker A
with the husband, with the husband. Give, catch the ball. But learn also to release it in order to catch another ball. I must know how to balance my life. But when I looked at juggling, the world record is 11 balls. That is
28:26
Speaker A
the world record. I, I also know how to do it with three, like if I show you, okay? No, three. I know you see people doing it with four, with five. I have children who do it with four, five—
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Speaker A
champions! Like, how do they do it? Like, things aren't going so well for me. The idea is: everything in life is training. Nobody is born with it, there is no one in the world who was born saying: "Hey, give me some balls, boom!
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Speaker A
" There is no such thing. They 100% trained, 100%dropped balls, 100%it took time until you see them where they are now. Therefore, don't get confused when you see successful people, each in their own field—it doesn't matter what field you choose. You see people
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Speaker A
and think: "Wow, listen, he’s a pro, she’s a world champion," but you're seeing them at the final stage, so to speak. You don't know what they went through, you don't know the ups and downs, how many balls they dropped, how
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Speaker A
frustrated they were, or how much they despaired—none of that you see. So first, remember: nobody was born " somehow." There are innate traits, but most successful people in life have acquired traits. Anything I want in my life, I can learn it, I can train in it
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Speaker A
. True, I might need to train for a long time, but as long as it takes—do I care? There are those who are more talented, who learn it faster; it doesn't matter. I see the finished product, I don't know if they were born
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Speaker A
talented or not; the result is the same , usually a product of training. And if I want to succeed at something in life, remember these three things: first.
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Speaker A
Don't look at successful people and say : "Look where he is, look what a champion she is," you don't know the path they took. Second, along the way, they fell many times, no matter the field, they had many, many difficulties
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Speaker A
, 100%, whether it's business, relationships, it doesn't matter. The third and last thing: they persevered.
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Speaker A
Those who persevere won't be rattled by failures, no matter what, they will be able to continue. And so, we take the Four Species. The Four Species—we have four items. One is the Lulav: you must be steady, you must be stable, and
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Speaker A
again—the Four Species represent the whole human body, but you have to be steady. All the others are fluttering about, you'll see them soon, they're kind of flimsy. The Lulav is the core, the spine; you must be stable, you must
30:37
Speaker A
be steady, strong. No matter what storms come, you need one thing to hold you up. Right, there are moments when you break, moments when you're exhausted, when you don't want anything , but you must have something to lift
30:49
Speaker A
you up, to give you stability—that's the Lulav. We have the Myrtle: the Myrtle is composed of three little leaves. If you see a professional myrtle, what is called a "Sukkot myrtle ," each of its stems is made of three
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Speaker A
—made of three leaves—it corresponds to the four, to Isaac and Jacob (doesn't matter what they are), but you have three leaves on every such stem, three leaves coming out of the same root. Three leaves. A myrtle with two leaves is called a "drinking myrtle
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Speaker A
"—pay close attention, a "drinking myrtle" is called a myrtle with two leaves. What is "drinking"? Like, what, it's spreading out, so to speak. So the Lulav corresponds to the spine, the myrtle corresponds to the eyes (that's why it looks like eyes), the willow
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Speaker A
corresponds to the lips (it looks like a lip), and the Etrog corresponds to... The heart. Beautiful. So the heart must be clean. That is why the Etrog, you will see, they are very careful that it doesn't have any black spots. The heart
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Speaker A
must be clean. And give yourselves this gift. Cleanse the heart. Cleanse the heart. That is the reason we take the Four Species and make these kinds of motions with them. You will see, when you go to the synagogue, like we shake
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Speaker A
them. Like, what, what is the idea? It is: I take to the heart and I distance from the heart, take to the heart, distance from the heart. Not like, that's it, I'm stuck with it, brother.
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Speaker A
Let go, let go. While there are many deep things here according to Kabbalah, but just as an idea, I don't return to the heart. I don't return. The heart is not a warehouse, alright? I take everything into the heart but I release
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Speaker A
it, so the heart is the Etrog that must be perfect, that must be clean. Cleanse your heart for your own sake, always remember, not for anyone else, purely for you, because we are full of crud, full of "they said to me" and "they did
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Speaker A
to me," and it doesn't matter what. You know, a certain rabbi was invited to a funeral. He told me, he was invited to a funeral. Now, he is a rabbi who does this, it's his job, so he arrived and
32:35
Speaker A
saw—he arrived at the funeral and saw two groups. He saw the widow, not just anyone, a widow, and saw two groups. So he asks the widow, "What is this?" She says: "My two sons, they haven't spoken to each other for 25 years and they are
32:50
Speaker A
feuding, so two families, as it were, they don't approach each other." And then the rabbi saw a family not religious at all, not religious, but nice, they held a ceremony as if it were. So he said, "Wow, I feel like
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Speaker A
trying something now, I'm inventing a law." He came to the, to the widow: He said, "Listen, I am telling you the truth, but it's impossible, impossible, impossible, it's impossible to bury them like this according to the law."" There is a problem, because if the
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Speaker A
children don't stand together, hold hands and say Kaddish together, it's not...it's impossible to bury." She said, "What, it's impossible to bury?
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Speaker A
What will I do?""I can wait with you, sort of, but uh...it's problematic." If the kids won’t hold hands, be at peace, and say the Kaddish together— then the burial, having to wait here until it’s...she was frustrated and snapped: "Enough with your nonsense,
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Speaker A
you’re acting like babies!" Make up now, your father here can't be buried like this. You said: "Oh, he can't be buried like this because they’ll judge you," listen, I chose for them, it's not that. So don't believe everything a Rabbi says, like, God
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Speaker A
forbid, just know for yourself so you don't get fed lies. That...and my perspective is like, they're cute, you know? There are those who are innocent, not malicious, like sometimes you need something. Enough with the nonsense, cleanse your hearts already, come on,
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Speaker A
cut it out with your childish behavior. I'm saying this seriously now, sometimes we don't get along, fine, it's challenging, great, but sometimes we need something to unite us, and that’s the idea. After all, we know the Four Species represent four types
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Speaker A
in the people of Israel, and we take them all together, okay? All of them together. I...there are those who bring me etrogs, you know, like: "Your Honor, take this, it's the premium kind, listen, it’s really top-tier." Now an
34:35
Speaker A
etrog can cost 1000 shekels, even more, yes, it’s not...there are those that are delusional, sorry, saying " delusional," it’s a mitzvah, but generally, it’s absurd, because think about it, for seven days the etrog is at its peak, okay? It shines for a day
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Speaker A
after Sukkot, but the day after, what do you do? How much is an etrog worth?
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Speaker A
It cost 1500 shekels, the day after Sukkot, how much is it worth? Not even 10 agorot, bro, people aren't normal, you pay 1500 shekels for...
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Speaker A
It turns into jam. It turns into jam, even that, and I don't want it after everyone touched it , like, bro, eat that jam, I don't even want it as jam. Let it go. But that’s the idea again, it’s really about
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Speaker A
cherishing the moment, like when we go on vacation again. Speaking of prices, I didn't want the prices they gave the kids for trees, I said fine, I'll just pay, I didn't enjoy it, the kids didn't want to. In short, the main point is
35:29
Speaker A
for us to cleanse our hearts, so the heart is the etrog, the lips are the two willows, two lips. Understood perfectly, we said the spine is the lulav, and then the eyes we said were the...
35:41
Speaker A
The myrtle, but I told you there are three leaves on every stem of the myrtle, how many eyes do we have?
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Speaker A
Why did you shove another one in there? What is this, a third eye, Rabbi? Like, cuties, alright, God willing, back in the day they didn't have that nonsense, the fact that they believe in these things. But honestly, like, why did
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Speaker A
they shove another one in here? Furthermore, we said that if it’s called an "A" myrtle, if it’s a " shoteh"(foolish) myrtle, then it’s called a foolish myrtle. Why? What does "shoteh" mean? A "shoteh" is someone who is, like, not 100 percent, so to
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Speaker A
speak. Now, have we heard if an invalid lulav is called a "foolish lulav"? Why did you throw this curse at me? Why?
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Speaker A
What’s the point? Is he insulting me? Why? If the myrtle isn't helpful, isn't kosher, just tell me it's not kosher, like an etrog that's not kosher—I don't know what a "foolish myrtle" is.
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Speaker A
But listen closely: we must always remember that while we have two eyes, our eyes don't see the whole picture.
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Speaker A
You really need a third eye; you really need something external. I told you, there's even a method in the therapy world called the "three pairs of shoes.
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Speaker A
" Did I tell you what the three pairs of shoes are? Meaning, if you are in a conflict with someone—say, a husband, a wife, or at work—you have your own pair of shoes, right? That’s one pair of shoes, or one pair of eyes, where
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Speaker A
you see the situation from your own side. Then there is the second pair of shoes. That is the second pair of eyes, the other person’s. I’ve always said that in a relationship, you are both right—remember that, in a
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Speaker A
relationship, you are both always right . Each one is right from their own perspective. And each one is sure they are right and feels the other person has wronged them. Both sides are right, and each one sees their own side. If I
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Speaker A
really want to know the truth, there is a third side. A third party should come and judge between them. And that is, so to speak, the third pair of shoes or the third pair of eyes, let's call it
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Speaker A
the "objective" one. Someone standing on the sidelines, the counselor so to speak, someone looking at it objectively, without bias, saying: " Listen, both of you, I love you, but you’re both being delusional." Okay, I need this third eye, because if not,
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Speaker A
I’m a fool; if not, I think I understand. Okay, but I don't understand anything. Really, I don't understand anything, because I don't know why a person is going through something; everyone has their own scripts. Regarding one of the great
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Speaker A
Torah scholars, speaking of a different perspective, you know? One of the great Torah scholars, Rabbi Shteinman—of blessed memory, Rabbi Shteinman. Now, one of the great Torah scholars, one day in Bnei Brak, there was a family whose son had gone off the path—like,
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Speaker A
he wasn't interested in religion, didn't want anything to do with it, it just wasn't working for him at all. The point was he was flying abroad, he had some non-Jewish girlfriend, he was like , drifting away completely, totally,
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Speaker A
saying goodbye. And then a friend said to him: "Listen, before you fly, before you completely shut yourself off over there, come spend a Shabbat with your parents, you know, a farewell Shabbat before you fly." So he said: "Fine, no
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Speaker A
problem, as long as they don't preach to me about things, tell them not to nag me." Fine, I smoke, I don't keep Shabbat; if they respect me, I will respect them. He talked to his parents, they say: "Just come, it's fine." He
38:34
Speaker A
arrives at his parents ', he smokes, everything is good, they don't say a word, no problem. In the afternoon, the father went to his regular class with Rabbi Steinman, so he says to his son: "Listen, I'm going to Rabbi Steinman,
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Speaker A
it’s a short class, about fifteen minutes, afterwards people get blessings, come with me, you'll get a blessing for your flight and things, come." The guy says to him: "Why would I come now?""Dad, don't be weird, I mean you know, it's about him and what?
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Speaker A
""Leave me alone with rabbis, leave me alone." He agrees. They arrive for the fifteen-minute class, and then people stand in line to get blessings and the guy stood there too. Everyone who reaches the Rabbi says: "Shabbat Shalom ," and the Rabbi says to him: "Shabbat
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Speaker A
Shalom" with a blessing. So the guy, as soon as he reached the Rabbi, says to him: "Rabbi, I, before you bless me, I don't keep Shabbat, like I'm not going to tell you' Shabbat Shalom, 'I don't, I don't keep Shabbat." He says to him:
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Speaker A
"Okay, wonderful, how long have you not been keeping Shabbat?" He said...he said to him: "Two years." He says to him: "Anything, nothing?" He says: "No, nothing, nothing, nothing.""Okay, nice.
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Speaker A
""Just asking you a question, I'm interested: but in these two years, did you have moments where you wanted to keep Shabbat?""What could it be?""How many times, how many?""How many such moments?""Maybe four times, tops, just four times.""Okay, and at those times,
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Speaker A
how much time did you have thoughts about keeping Shabbat?""10 minutes each time, also tops.""But come on, don't get excited." The Rabbi says to him: " So, 40 minutes.""For 40 minutes you were a*baal teshuvah*(repentant).""For 40 minutes you were standing in a place
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Speaker A
that even righteous people rarely reach ." Listen, the guy was a champion, was he moved! Like, "I'm a world champion." But without, like, "thank you very much , goodbye." The guy left, after that he did some soul-searching, changed
40:21
Speaker A
completely, flew to the United States, but strong in a totally, totally different way. When he returned, he came back completely, in every aspect.
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Speaker A
So his father asked him: "Tell me, it interests me, I didn't want to dig because I wanted to give you your space , why, why did you come with me to the Rabbi?""Like you know, it was about him
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Speaker A
." He says: "Let me tell you, you don't know this, but I was in Talmud Torah, and in Talmud Torah there is a custom of going to the great Torah scholars who examine the children, and I was weak in my studies." You know, that's
40:47
Speaker A
very beautiful, that he was weak in his studies. In my Talmud Torah, we reached Rabbi Shteinman, and he began testing the children, one by one, and when my turn came, he asked me a question that wasn't hard, but I didn't...so I told
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Speaker A
him: I don't know. So he asked another question, even easier, and I tried and tried, no, I don't know. So he asked a question like, A-B, something like that , basic A-B. So I said: I don't know.
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Speaker A
He says: Okay, go stand in line. And then every child who was tested received a candy, received a candy from the Rabbi. When I reached him, I said: I don't even deserve a candy because I didn't have the answers. So he gave me
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Speaker A
three candies, he reached out his hand like this, and said: Come to me later.
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Speaker A
Three candies. And then when everyone had left, the Rabbi told me, he told me to come to him. I approached him and then he told me: You should know that up in Heaven, the Creator does not judge a person by their results, but by
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Speaker A
their efforts, and you tried three times, so you deserve three candies, and always remember that. Forget the results. Your effort is worth much more to me and to the Creator. Take that with you. I say this was the first time
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Speaker A
I wasn't shamed for not knowing, and I wasn't made to feel that I could do better. I don't know about you, but that famous sentence in parent-teacher conferences, when I would come to a teacher, they would tell my mother: He
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Speaker A
can do more. Too bad that your mother can't do more. Okay, maybe your mother can do more, and that's why I was willing to go to him. That's called a third eye, you understand? Don't judge a person based on...allow yourself to
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Speaker A
look a bit beyond, just a bit beyond. Right, there is more than how I behave in my day-to-day life, my successes, or my failures. I hope I truly merit to look a bit beyond, a bit bigger than all this pettiness, what he did,
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Speaker A
calculating, always calculating, hundreds...just let go. So these are the Four Species, and you take them all together. And therefore, even if I feel like a willow, our Sages said that everyone has something that the other doesn't have. The Etrog is the perfect
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Speaker A
one, okay, great, it has both taste and it has fragrance, lovely. The myrtle has fragrance, but it has no taste. The Lulav has taste, because it's a date, but it has no fragrance. The willow has nothing at all. Now there are sets,
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Speaker A
I’m telling you, just an Etrog is 1500 NIS, so some sets are worth 2000 NIS; without the willow, 5 NIS. You aren't worth anything without, without the start, 5 NIS. Whatever, throw it, throw that, you can keep it if you want
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Speaker A
. But sometimes you need to know in life that I have four, four species. I have periods where I am an Etrog, but honestly, without any bad. Every once in a while, once in a year or two, you
43:35
Speaker A
know, everything flows and goes great for me, I have an etrog, I’m not saying I don’t. I also have a lulav, things go this way and that way, and I have a myrtle, but there is also a willow. Don't throw it away, don't
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Speaker A
throw it away, understand that part of life is the willow and it's the complete picture, and without it you’re not whole, remember that. And one day you will tell about these moments to your children, to your grandchildren, to people, it doesn't
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Speaker A
matter who. Not just your successes, success is cute, but it’s kind of gross even, it’s just showing off.
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Speaker A
Tell me about, about the flesh, the normal stuff, the pain, the...you understand? Regarding my kids, speaking of the cabin, I just can't go and do things for no reason. I can, I work on myself, but I said to myself, man, I'm
44:13
Speaker A
doing this cabin trip now for my birthday, which I hadn't done, let's say, and then I said, hey, I'm doing this every month now, every month I’m doing this. And then I told the kids: kids, I’m doing this every month, God
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Speaker A
willing, going to the cabin to be by myself and so on, and every time I invite one child, one child to the cabin, not all of them, let it go, I have things to do with myself, but for
44:33
Speaker A
an open conversation with Dad, a conversation without censorship, just one child, I have seven. Like, the most open conversation in the world, to talk as openly as possible, no censorship, no gloves, no sugarcoating. I want you to talk to me, brother, honestly. And
44:51
Speaker A
I’m telling you, it was something so special, because every child has their own thing. And I need to...as an older Jewish man once told me, he says: "Know this, I wish for you to be the best friend to your daughters, because if
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Speaker A
you aren't their friend, they will have a boyfriend." Maybe it's important to you that they don't, fine, but if you won't be your daughters' friend, they will look for a boyfriend, everyone wants a boyfriend, that's normal. And therefore I’m just saying, if we can
45:13
Speaker A
talk openly, you and I now, we can talk openly, even about our relationship, about the path with my wife, everything , everything. Listen, I have something to tell you. Like, stay with me, don't leave. Like, oh, just like that, bye.
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Speaker A
Like someone who can accept you completely, even with your filth and your nonsense, and not afterwards, you know, look at you with less favor.
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Speaker A
Quite the opposite. Quite the opposite. Without the willow, you’re worth nothing. As they say, you’re not worth anything. Bring me your willow.
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Speaker A
You know why? Because I have a willow too. And everyone has a willow. And the moment you talk about it, it becomes less scary. It also becomes less, like, threatening. I don't want to hide my Arba'at HaMinim, the so-called Sukkot,
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Speaker A
you understand? Sukkot is about taking everything you have, bringing it into the Sukkah, and that is why it is the time of our rejoicing. One last thing, it’s the time of our rejoicing and that’s beautiful, but know that
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Speaker A
something is going to go wrong. Not this holiday, you’ll have a good holiday, God willing, but something always goes wrong, it’s always like that. And in Sukkot, there are always these stories, and there’s one famous story about a Jew who managed to buy
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Speaker A
the Tefillin of the Baal Shem Tov. Now you know, these are huge things. Not today, today it’s Yehuda will read.
46:21
Speaker A
It was today, sometimes things that are good are worth billions, oh my, billions; so even back then it was worth a lot. Well, at some point Sukkot arrived, and there’s this family that doesn't have much money, they have the
46:32
Speaker A
Tefillin of the Baal Shem Tov but no money and barely enough to eat at home, barely anything, but they have the Tefillin. And the holiday of Sukkot arrived and there are no etrogs, no etrogs. It’s not like today, today,
46:44
Speaker A
thank God, in the Land of Israel, as they say, and today it’s like, you can juggle etrogs. But come on, it’s crazy there, you should come to the Four Species market once, like, oh my God! I don't even know what to choose,
46:54
Speaker A
like, that’s why I prefer that they either bring me one or I buy a sealed one, but I can't handle the pressure, like, what? I also have a few etrogs, I collect etrogs; I have one Moroccan, one Yemenite, one Ashkenazi. Yes,
47:03
Speaker A
taking all the traditions, like come on guys, let's do something together, at least with the etrog, let's be together , just kidding.
47:12
Speaker A
An etrog merchant arrived, with one etrog that was the most expensive of the expensive, the best of the best.
47:17
Speaker A
The man got excited: "Wow, really?"" I’ll sell the Baal Shem Tov's Tefillin, I’ll buy the etrog, I’ll buy this etrog, I’ll bring merit to the whole town." He buys the etrog, sells the Tefillin of the Baal Shem Tov
47:30
Speaker A
, buys the etrog. He comes home with the etrog, all excited. Now, men, they have a business sense, but not always, they think big: "I’ll take its seeds, then I’ll plant them, I’ll do something with them." And usually, the
47:44
Speaker A
one who clips your wings is the wife; yes, she is a bit more sane sometimes, she is a bit more balanced, sometimes they love you, rely on you, you’re the hero, God willing, you’re the...
47:54
Speaker A
you’re, God willing. But sometimes she, you know, brings you down: "Come on, land, start being a human being." That Anyway, so his wife says to him: " Where is the etrog from?" He tells her: "Listen, I sold the Tefillin." She went
48:09
Speaker A
crazy on him: "You didn't...you don't have it?""That's for the father, buy things for the holiday, food, clothes." A total disaster, like he didn't know what got into his etrog. And these are the well-known stories: the etrog has a
48:23
Speaker A
pitam on top, oh, a bite, you have a bite mark, may you be healthy. I mean, what, what, all those stories are extensive, nothing. In short, once there's a bite, that's it, it's invalid , invalid. Now, a normal guy, brother,
48:39
Speaker A
7,000 km, goes out, secular, what is called, he didn't get angry at all. And then he said a sentence I want us to take into our lives: I have no tefillin anymore, I have no etrog anymore, so there's no reason to be angry too.
48:56
Speaker A
Listen well, why lose again? Why lose again? Remember, we have a rule in our courses that I tell them: don't lose twice. I lost an etrog, and I also get angry, that's losing twice. Don't lose twice! What happened happened, fine, we
49:12
Speaker A
made a mistake, we fell, they attacked us, you lost something, no big deal. Understand, this won't happen to you, but it happens to some people, you fell , don't lose twice. And that is why " time of our joy" is specifically Sukkot
49:28
Speaker A
, because Sukkot is one of the most challenging holidays: you leave the house, suddenly you're with ants, with neighbors, with the whole family, how fun Uncle Jacob, everyone's here.
49:41
Speaker A
Impossible, unless I understand that along the way there will be nuisances, everything is good, it's part of the movie, it's part of the scenery. And I will conclude with just one thing, I'm reminded of this, it's all part of the
49:53
Speaker A
scenery. A woman told me, she hadn't spoken to her father for close to 30 years. Her father was simply the most critical person in the world, there's no way my father would say something good to me. He always found something
50:08
Speaker A
to criticize, and even when he said something good, it was like, well, it's a shame that...or, come help me, even his compliments were sort of self-interested. She said to me: Listen , you told this once, she said: You
50:20
Speaker A
know, before I got married I said I want to make peace with my father, enough, you know, after all I'm getting married, you want your parents there.
50:27
Speaker A
So she went with her father on a trip, they got into the car, they said: Come, let's drive a bit, let's drive and there will be scenery, we'll talk, we're driving. I'm sitting in the driver's seat, my father is in the
50:37
Speaker A
passenger seat. Next to the driver, my father, driving, we're driving, driving , driving, driving. We arrived at some place, really nice, and I say to my father: Wow, what a beautiful view! And my father says: Not at all, a ruin.
50:49
Speaker A
Enough, Rabbi, sorry, she says it completely crushed me. Enough, enough, enough, enough, enough, enough. I tell him: Dad, come on, let’s try, come back, enough, we’ve had enough. He didn’t even understand what I was upset about, but it’s like—he has
51:01
Speaker A
to ruin things, he has this thing, he must ruin it. I don’t want him to ruin my marriage, I don’t want him to upset my husband. We turned around, went home, and for 30 years I haven't spoken to my father. I don’t want to
51:10
Speaker A
talk to him, no, it’s over, it’s over, he already passed away, it's over . She says to me: You know what? 30 years...because after 30 years my husband and I went on a trip, and we drove and drove and drove, and we
51:22
Speaker A
reached the same place. This time I was driving and my husband sat next to me.
51:27
Speaker A
We...well, you know, when you reach a place with baggage, you...it immediately brought everything back to me, everything. I reached that place, I looked left from the driver's side— and what did I see?
51:41
Speaker A
A lot of life. On the right side there were truly beautiful things. I looked at the right side and said to myself: Dad, look at that beauty. He looked at his side, that's all. But I always understand it
51:51
Speaker A
right away. That’s it, that’s it, that’s it, that’s it. Let’s do a restart. Let’s really enter the Sukkah. Everyone should enter as much as they can—even 10 minutes, a quarter of an hour, a day, however long you want—enter the Sukkah and think:
52:03
Speaker A
You are now truly entering the wings of the Holy One, Blessed be He, receive a hug from the Creator of the world. Your whole body will come out different, you will come out different. May we merit to come out different, to really see
52:14
Speaker A
reality and ourselves differently. And I’ll say more than that: always look for the good, because it exists within yourselves, in others, and in every life situation. May God strengthen us like that, Amen, may it be His will.
52:25
Speaker A
Thank you very much and happy holiday, Thank you Mazal.
Topics:Rabbi Yitzchak PangerSukkotJewish holidaysTorah commandmentsJewish joyFour SpeciesPassoverJewish festivalSpiritualityJewish tradition

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