Speaker A
- I'm gonna propose to her.
Smosh Games plays a hilarious Love Is Blind-inspired dating game with quirky contestants and funny moments.
Ask about this video. Answers come from its transcript only — with the timestamp, so you can check them.
Generated from the transcript and can be wrong — check the timestamp.
Key Takeaways
- Love Is Blind format can be adapted into a comedic game with engaging personalities.
- Humor and vulnerability coexist in dating scenarios, making the content relatable and entertaining.
- Social media and personal branding are integral to modern dating culture.
- Group dynamics and playful teasing enhance viewer engagement.
- The parody highlights common dating challenges like cheating, ghosting, and relationship expectations.
What the video covers
- Smosh Games hosts a game based on the TV show Love Is Blind, featuring contestants with humorous and exaggerated personalities.
- Contestants introduce themselves with playful nicknames like 'Sparkle Shayne' and share their dating goals and quirks.
- The group engages in witty banter, jokes about past relationships, and funny interactions about topics like cheating and blind dating.
- Characters reveal their hopes for love, family, and social media fame, blending sincerity with comedy.
- The video includes playful accusations, awkward moments, and humorous confessions about personal habits and experiences.
- Contestants discuss their preferences, hobbies like pickleball, and expectations for future partners.
- The game format mimics the original show’s pods and blind dating setup but with a comedic twist.
- The cast’s dynamic creates a lighthearted atmosphere full of laughter, teasing, and camaraderie.
- The video balances parody of dating shows with genuine moments of vulnerability and connection.
- Overall, the video offers entertainment through a mix of improv, character-driven humor, and social commentary.
Chapters
- 00:00Introduction and Proposals
- 02:40Contestant Introductions and Nicknames
- 04:20Funny Banter and Sweater Incident
- 06:10Contestants Share Their Hobbies and Goals
- 07:40Hair Salon and Social Media Ambitions
- 09:20Family and Relationship Expectations
- 11:20Blind Date Experiences and Preferences
- 19:00Game Progress and Group Dynamics
Full Transcript — Download SRT & Markdown
Speaker A
- We'll make her decide. (Chanse gasps)
Speaker A
- I just, I cannot get cheated on again, you know?
Speaker A
- [Angela] Do not say yes.
Speaker A
- Is it you who pooped on Angela's sweater?
Speaker A
- No, I wouldn't do that.
Speaker A
- Oh, my God.
Speaker A
- I wanna put my kids in cute little pajamas and film them for the internet to see.
Speaker A
- Shut the (beep) up.
Speaker A
- While the guys have a goon sesh.
Speaker A
- How did they know?
Speaker A
- I'm getting left with the guy who gets jacked off by a robot.
Speaker A
- I will be looking straight to her birthing hips.
Speaker A
- It's not for me, I don't have IBS.
Speaker A
- You wish.
Speaker A
- (beep) you.
Speaker A
- I love you.
Speaker A
- And she cut me one time. Also, my asshole is closed.
Speaker A
- I don't mean to interrupt the round-
Speaker A
- What?
Speaker A
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, wee-wah.
Speaker A
- Get ready. (dramatic music)
Speaker A
- Hello, and welcome to Love Is Blind. (group applauds) We are Smosh.
Speaker A
- And today we're gonna be playing the game that we know and love based off the TV show that we know and we love, Love Is Blind.
Speaker A
- (group applauds) Let's go around and meet our contestants that we know and love. (Angela laughing) (Chanse laughing) (Amanda claps) Go on.
Speaker A
- What's up? I'm Shayne.
Speaker A
- No, no, no, no. Sparkle.
Speaker A
- You forgot the Sparkle.
Speaker A
- God. You're an idiot, you're an idiot. Literally one thing we were adding.
Speaker A
- We talked about it-
Speaker A
- Yeah, I didn't sign off on this, but fine.
Speaker A
- Hi, I'm Sparkle Shayne. (group cheers)
Speaker A
- Did you only put Sparkle Angela and the rest of us-
Speaker A
- I did Sparkle Angela, and I was like, I'm not gonna do this, I'm not gonna do this at all.
Speaker A
- [Angela] Okay, I'll do it for you.
Speaker A
- Thank you, Angela.
Speaker A
- Okay, Arasha Sparkle.
Speaker A
- Arasha, comma, Sparkle?
Speaker A
- First name, Arasha, last name Sparkle.
Speaker A
- Sparkle.
Speaker A
- Yeah, I'm Sparkle Shayne.
Speaker A
- You know, I love like hiking. I'm in my 30s, you know, just really looking for that special person, you know?
Speaker A
- But I'm very independent, I'm looking for someone, you know, I wanna believe love is blind, but you know, I hope that I, like I've typically dated really hot people.
Speaker A
- So you know it'll be interesting if they're not that vibe. But you know, that's the kind of the experiment so we'll see, you know?
Speaker A
- Wow. So real. (Angela laughing) Oh, my God.
Speaker A
- Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry.
Speaker A
- Angela, you haven't said anything yet.
Speaker A
- You're up.
Speaker A
- What's funny?
Speaker A
- It's Shayne.
Speaker A
- She was looking at her glass before.
Speaker A
- She goes, "Oh, my God." I go, "What, is there shit in there?" Like, just genuinely.
Speaker A
- I was like, is there shit in there?
Speaker A
- You looked at me and you were like, "Is there shit in there?"
Speaker A
- [Arasha] Ready to have their little moment where they're like, hi, I'm this.
Speaker A
- Great, heard.
Speaker A
- [Ian] Look at that. (Angela laughing)
Speaker A
- [Arasha] To A.
Speaker A
- [Chanse] You guys be (beep) honest, am I ugly?
Speaker A
- I'm sorry. Hey, here we go, we'll cut all that. Hi, I'm Sparkle Angela (laughs).
Speaker A
- Yeah, you know what? That's good.
Speaker A
- I'm Sparkle Angela, I'm 26 and a half, and I'm ready to settle down.
Speaker A
- You wish.
Speaker A
- (beep) you.
Speaker A
- No, she's not.
Speaker A
- Whoa.
Speaker A
- I am.
Speaker A
- Do you guys smell that?
Speaker A
- Goddam.
Speaker A
- If you-
Speaker A
- Did you fart?
Speaker A
- No.
Speaker A
- That's what I said.
Speaker A
- That's not funny.
Speaker A
- Who farted?
Speaker A
- Ian farted, he is trying to blame it on Sparkle Angela.
Speaker A
- No, no. I walked by and he went, "When's the last time you washed that sweater?"
Speaker A
- I did not.
Speaker A
- No, I said-
Speaker A
- What?
Speaker A
- And he said it kind of genuinely.
Speaker A
- He genuinely asked me.
Speaker A
- I said, "Did you just put that sweater on?"
Speaker A
- Yes, yes. And don't worry, I made him smell, I made everybody smell, it doesn't smell.
Speaker A
- I didn't smell it, so-
Speaker A
- I didn't smell it either.
Speaker A
- I didn't smell it.
Speaker A
- And she didn't smell before she had that sweater on.
Speaker A
- He goes, "Did you just put it on?"
Speaker A
- So she did smell?
Speaker A
- I smelled the sweater up close, it doesn't smell.
Speaker A
- Alexcina just gasped the loudest I've ever heard.
Speaker A
- When I tell you, this place is taking my digital footprint and going (imitates smashing).
Speaker A
- (group laughs)
Speaker A
- Is there anything else you wanna say, Sparkle Angela?
Speaker A
- No, I'm gonna start laughing.
Speaker A
- You didn't really say anything.
Speaker A
- I think we understood her vibes.
Speaker A
- She's 26 and a half.
Speaker A
- She's 26 and a half, smelly sweater.
Speaker A
- I was 26 a half a year ago and now I'm 26 and a half and now I wanna settle down.
Speaker A
- That's how it goes.
Speaker A
- [Amanda] Okay.
Speaker A
- I think my personality is I'm 26 and a half.
Speaker A
- I'm Sparkle Arasha, and what can I say? I love pickleball, I love shopping at the mall, and I'm just looking for a buddy to join me.
Speaker A
- [Group] A buddy.
Speaker A
- Just a buddy.
Speaker A
- A buddy to play pickleball.
Speaker A
- A buddy.
Speaker A
- I want a buddy.
Speaker A
- Didn't know this is Buddies Are Blind.
Speaker A
- Pickleball's a hilarious choice.
Speaker A
- That's good.
Speaker A
- Thank you. (Shayne laughs) (Arasha laughs) Well, it's my hobby, so thank you.
Speaker A
- Hello, I am Sparkle Ian.
Speaker A
- [Producer] Woo.
Speaker A
- Thank you.
Speaker A
- No.
Speaker A
- We got some fans here already.
Speaker A
- Why is there a woo?
Speaker A
- Oh, boy.
Speaker A
- I'm really just here to grow my social media presence.
Speaker A
- But I guess find love too. But mostly just like looking for like a DraftKings or a PrizePicks or a Polymarket or really any kind of like betting sponsorship.
Speaker A
- I have no morals, I'm just looking for money and love.
Speaker A
- Everyone leaves the room across from him.
Speaker A
- All the women go, cool, and then they leave.
Speaker A
- I forgot to say I run a hair salon.
Speaker A
- [Arasha] Right.
Speaker A
- [Ian] Okay.
Speaker A
- [Amanda] Run it?
Speaker A
- [Spencer] Whoa, what the, can you just do that?
Speaker A
- What, I just-
Speaker A
- What do you mean? Put her hair on top of her head?
Speaker A
- Yeah.
Speaker A
- Spencer had no idea how your hair worked.
Speaker A
- Actually, this is a totally different vibe.
Speaker A
- Wait, you kind of look, wait, it's kind of hot.
Speaker A
- It's kind of hot.
Speaker A
- What?
Speaker A
- [Arasha] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker A
- [Chanse] It's kinda like wolfy.
Speaker A
- [Spencer] No, it's not.
Speaker A
- It's wolf cut. No, I like it.
Speaker A
- It's good, it's good.
Speaker A
- I'm gonna keep it.
Speaker A
- I'm Sparkle Angela, I'm 26 and a half, and I wanna settle down.
Speaker A
- They'll cut that together.
Speaker A
- [Angela] And I run-
Speaker A
- My name is Boxy.
Speaker A
- (Shayne laughs)
Speaker A
- I run a hair salon.
Speaker A
- Hey, I'm Sparkle Chanse. I am coming to the pods hoping to find love.
Speaker A
- But more importantly, I wanna start a family. It's the most important thing to me, I am family-oriented.
Speaker A
- It's really, really what I care about. And I need to find someone who is ready to expand and conjoin.
Speaker A
- (Shayne laughs)
Speaker A
- You are a serial killer.
Speaker A
- Expand our family and conjoin our family's existing families.
Speaker A
- Yeah.
Speaker A
- Okay.
Speaker A
- Expand upon future-
Speaker A
- Jesus.
Speaker A
- I think we got it the first time.
Speaker A
- [Arasha] Thank you.
Speaker A
- Okay.
Speaker A
- [Chanse] Family.
Speaker A
- Definitely not choosing you. Ew.
Speaker A
- You haven't seen him yet.
Speaker A
- You haven't seen me.
Speaker A
- I've heard him and he sounds like a murderer.
Speaker A
- Hi I'm hi, I'm Sparkle Amanda. I've been cheated on multiple times. (group laughs) I don't know why.
Speaker A
- I don't know why they would ever do that to me. It's actually crazy how many times I've been cheated on.
Speaker A
- Anyways, I am here to start fresh and meet the one that I love and the one that I'll be with for the rest of my life.
Speaker A
- And I can't wait to mingle and laugh-
Speaker A
- With my hot hot wife.
Speaker A
- With my hot hot wife.
Speaker A
- [Arasha] Oh.
Speaker A
- Husband.
Speaker A
- Oh.
Speaker A
- That is-
Speaker A
- Whatever.
Speaker A
- Such a real archetype.
Speaker A
- Yeah, and I want him to be six-four and up. I'll be asking. Get ready.
Speaker A
- Oh, shit. (group laughs)
Speaker A
- Yay.
Speaker A
- I can't wait to do yoga and make guacamole in the girls' room.
Speaker A
- Oh, my God. I love the girls' room.
Speaker A
- The last person to have gone on a blind date goes first.
Speaker A
- So has anyone here been on a blind date before?
Speaker A
- I have.
Speaker A
- I have before.
Speaker A
- I never went on a blind date.
Speaker A
- I never did.
Speaker A
- I never went on a blind date.
Speaker A
- I've been on a blind date.
Speaker A
- Okay, how long ago?
Speaker A
- I went on one a year ago.
Speaker A
- 12 years ago.
Speaker A
- Okay. (Shayne laughs) (Angela laughs)
Speaker A
- [Ian] You said you went on one a year ago?
Speaker A
- Yeah.
Speaker A
- Okay, Sparkle Ann. Sorry.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Ann.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Ann.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Ann.
Speaker A
- (Arasha laughs) Just Sparkle Ann.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Ann.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Ann.
Speaker A
- Your hair made you somebody else.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Annie.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Annie.
Speaker A
- I picked three.
Speaker A
- God, I really accept this haircut.
Speaker A
- Yeah.
Speaker A
- I like it.
Speaker A
- [Ian] You look like one of the Saja Boys.
Speaker A
- Okay, guys, as a business owner, I'm curious about this. What type of small business would you start?
Speaker A
- A, a non-p
Speaker A
- [Amanda] Yeah. - [Ian] Yeah. - [Amanda] I see it. - [Ian] Yeah. - I'm also a lion with the pride, with the pack.
Speaker A
- Oh. - I get it. - For your family. - I'm a lion. (Amanda barks) - None of you are sloths?
Speaker A
- Ew. - The obvious answer is lion. - Yeah, it is. - Yeah. - Yes. - Yeah, my pride.
Speaker A
- Woo, I have two hearts. - [Spencer] Nice. - Two hearts with Shayne. - Thank you.
Speaker A
- Thank you. - Thank you. (Angela laughs) - You're connecting like crazy. - I am connecting so hard right now.
Speaker A
- Who do you have two hearts with? - He's that guy that- - I've got two hearts with you and two hearts with Chanse.
Speaker A
- That's right. - Wow. - Yes. - That's right. - Sparkle. - Okay, this one I think is really important.
Speaker A
I am a, A, side sleeper, B, stomach sleeper or, C, back sleeper. - Ooh.
Speaker A
- What's so cool about the pods is I feel like I'm getting to know people so quickly.
Speaker A
Like talking about what side you sleep on, I wouldn't ask that early, but because I can't see them, I get to know that now.
Speaker A
- Yep, I totally agree. I know who I'm gonna love based on the way they sleep.
Speaker A
- I answered B, stomach sleeper, face down in a ditch. - Yeah. (group laughs) Me too, B, stomach sleeper, I wanna look like I'm dead.
Speaker A
- I said C, back sleeper, so my family can sleep all around me. - Oh, my God.
Speaker A
(group laughs) God. - I said A 'cause usually I just fall asleep on my side while I'm liking my ex's Instagram posts.
Speaker A
- Oh, my God. - I also said B, stomach sleeper, ass up. (Angela gasps) - Oh, my God, I'm connecting with so many people.
Speaker A
I'm a stomachs down. (Arasha laughs) (Chanse laughs) - Okay, you're a stomachs gal? - I connected with you and I connected with you.
Speaker A
- Yay. - And you. - And me. - And what about me? - And me. - And you.
Speaker A
- And what about me? - Yay. - And you. - And me. - And what about me?
Speaker A
- And me. - And you. - Yay. - And me. (Arasha blows raspberries) - We connected.
Speaker A
- We connected, dude, that's so sick. I'm connecting with so many people here. - Can I ask you a honest questions, Sparkle Shayne?
Speaker A
- Yeah, Sparkle Angela. - Some of the girls in the house are talking about the fact that you are connecting with a lot of girls.
Speaker A
Who's your number one? - Ooh, that's so tough. I mean, if I'm being honest with you, like I really feel like a strong connection with you.
Speaker A
But also it's like I'm also really feeling a strong connection with Chanse. But I gotta be honest, I'm also feeling a really strong connection with Amanda.
Speaker A
And so it's just like really tough. But I would say it's definitely got, it's like, I mean for sure like you're so awesome, but like Amanda and Chanse are also so awesome.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Shayne said I was his number one like so many times and I'm like so giddy about it.
Speaker A
So I guess I'm his number one, it's awesome. Got my hooks in him. He's mine forever (laughs).
Speaker A
(Shayne laughs) - What one thing would you program your personal robot to do? A, respond to all my work emails.
Speaker A
- Jerk me off. (group laughs) Oh, yeah dude, I think we're really connecting. - Dude, I'm really connecting with you.
Speaker A
- God. - Sorry, what were the dumb answers? - [Amanda] God. - A, respond to all my work emails.
Speaker A
- Dumb. - B, clean the house. - Boo. - C, you don't wanna know.
Speaker A
- Oh. - Oh, so it's that one. (Shayne laughs) - How did they know?
Speaker A
- Stop. (group members laugh) - I don't know. I don't know what to say to you, guys.
Speaker A
- Don't. - Oh, my God. I'm gonna go with what I really want. - Why did it make you guys so happy?
Speaker A
- It's just stupid. (group laughs) - Because it's close, the future is near. (group laughs) - Shit, I'm just gonna go.
Speaker A
- You'll never be lonely again. - Yeah, obviously it's C. - [Angela] Cool. - You don't wanna know because they will be taking care of my kids because I have so many.
Speaker A
Robot nanny. Jetsons. - Mine's just a simple B, I just want them to clean the house.
Speaker A
I feel like that would be lovely and nice and kind. - Nice. (Spencer laughs) - Nice.
Speaker A
- I'd say you don't wanna know because like when I talk to you about the ins and outs of owning a small business, you don't really wanna know all of the little things I help with on day to day.
Speaker A
- What is your business again? - A salon. - [Amanda] A salon. - A salon for like your like body.
Speaker A
- She own it. It's for your hair. - No, it's for hair. - For your full body. - Need extensions?
Speaker A
- It's for your hair. - You do extensions? - Keratin, keratin. - Are you sure?
Speaker A
- Keratin. - Curtains? Would give you curtains. - I love a curtain. - We do a keratin treatment.
Speaker A
- Oh. - I would love a perm next time I come in. - Actually, it's kind of funny.
Speaker A
I don't think I said this before but I do really like AI so I'm gonna say you don't wanna know.
Speaker A
- [Group] Oh. - Oh, my God, oh, my God. - [Angela] Okay. - Okay, I gotta be honest.
Speaker A
I think right now, Arasha is like I'm totally connecting with her, she's totally my number one, but like right there with Angela and Chanse and Amanda.
Speaker A
- I think like literally, I have two hearts with Sparkle Shayne, two hearts with Sparkle Amanda and two hearts with Sparkle Arasha.
Speaker A
Like literally this- - We have three hearts. - We do? - Yeah. - And we have no hearts together.
Speaker A
- We connected on yours and both of mine. - I think Arasha is gaslighting Angela into convincing her that they've got a connection when I just don't think they do.
Speaker A
- I think Sparkle Shayne really sees me. - I really like Sparkle Arasha. But Shayne is like a brother to me.
Speaker A
Brother family oh. (Shayne laughs) (group laughs) - Oh, where's that robot? (group laughs) - My God.
Speaker A
- Which country would you most want to visit? A Brazil. B Japan. C Italy.
Speaker A
- Ooh. - [Spencer] Daijoubu. - Ooh. - Daijoubu. - These questions are like so deep.
Speaker A
- All right, what you got? I have C, Italy, 'cause big pasta style, Bucca Di Beppo.
Speaker A
- Family. - [Ian] Family. - Family. - A, Brazil, 'cause that's really what Amanda wants to do.
Speaker A
I really wanna go there. - Come to Brazil. - Genuine alert. (producers laughs) Genuine alert.
Speaker A
- [Spencer] We should have that button on stage where it's like, "Corny." - Hold on.
Speaker A
Shayne's about to drop some Japanese on us. - I'm not gonna, this guy doesn't, Sparkle Shayne does not speak Japanese.
Speaker A
- No, no, he does not. - I'm gonna go with B, Japan, 'cause that's fricking dope, dude.
Speaker A
Godzilla. - Oh, no. - Nice. - [Amanda] God. - I'm gonna go with C 'cause my dream is to sell a fettuccine Alfredo flavored shampoo.
Speaker A
- Ew. - What isn't there to get? - Sparkle Angela's scaring everybody in the woman's quarter.
Speaker A
She's screaming and she cut a piece of my hair in the back. I have a really short piece.
Speaker A
I don't know where it is. - I don't know why everyone's so grossed out that I had to lube up my yoga mat before yoga.
Speaker A
(producer laughs) - Confession. (Angela laughs) - What the (beep)? - I mean, I know I still can't see her, but I could hear Angela licking the screen in between when we're talking, and it was really freaking me out.
Speaker A
- I know I can't see her, but bro, you can smell her through the wall.
Speaker A
I knew that was her. - [Amanda] Oh, my God. - Wrong pod. - There's a toilet pod?
Speaker A
And then back to back. Not me, just somebody. - So you can hear your partner shit?
Speaker A
- Somebody. (group laughing) - Sparkle Shayne, is that you? - Sparkle Amanda? (imitates fart) (group laughs) - Dude. (Chanse imitates pooping) Oh, my God.
Speaker A
I fart like that too. - Yeah, keep on farting. (Shayne laughs) - Okay, well, where I would travel personally, I am a woman of culture, so I said Italy.
Speaker A
- Italy's the only one with culture. - And I would want AI to make my travel itinerary.
Speaker A
- Okay. - Oh well I said the only place that matters in the world 'cause they made Godzilla.
Speaker A
- Whoa, whoa. - It's Japan. Dude, dude. - Boom, boom. - Like do you think that actually happened?
Speaker A
- I think that was real. You know, I'm really feeling a strong connection with Ian.
Speaker A
I think I'm just really feeling like everybody. - These proposals are gonna start coming.
Speaker A
- I really do wanna see a contest in Love Is Blind who's just like, I'll marry any of these (beep).
Speaker A
I don't care. - It sometimes feels that way. - You're my number one. - Some of them are that way.
Speaker A
- Yeah. - [Ian] Here we go. - Do any of you girls want me to give you a blow out or anything?
Speaker A
- A what? - A blow out. - A blow what? - A blow what?
Speaker A
- Do you believe in ghosts? No, I'm afraid not. B, I believe some places could be haunted.
Speaker A
C, let's get the Ouija board out. - Ooh. (lively music) (Angela laughing) The lubed yoga mat is just like in the middle of the room and I keep slipping on it.
Speaker A
(group laughs) I don't know how to tell her. - Girls, I made tapas. - No - Tapas?
Speaker A
- I made tapas. - I made tapas. - I made tapas. - Hey girls- - Tampies. - Tapas in the kitchen.
Speaker A
- Tampies. - Tampies and tampas, ah. - God. - Tamps and tampas? - Tamps and tampas.
Speaker A
- Tamps and tampas is a good party. - Tamps and tampas. - Tamps and tampas.
Speaker A
(group laughs) - Get the Ouija board out. Let's call these (beep) to the present day.
Speaker A
- Did we skip you? - No. - No. - No, I was just- - No, just nobody connected with him.
Speaker A
(group laughs) Yeah, ghosts are real, I've got some. I live in an apartment that's definitely got ghosts but it's rent controlled and I don't really have any furniture or anything in it, but there's definitely some ghosts in there.
Speaker A
They're chill. - I have a Ouija board, it's been in my trunk for two years.
Speaker A
(Amanda laughing) (Arasha laughs) - [Spencer] That feels like it could be a true fact.
Speaker A
- Not me. No- - No. - I don't touch those things. - No, you do not touch Ouija boards.
Speaker A
- I don't touch that, I don't (beep) with that shit. - If you touch a Ouija board on a burial place, you are trapped.
Speaker A
- [Spencer] Should we do one on Smosh Games? - I won't be there. - Is there a burial ground?
Speaker A
- [Spencer] Oh yeah. - [Shayne] Probably. - No. - This room is so (beep) haunted, I won't do it.
Speaker A
- [Amanda] No- - I'll do it. - I won't do it. - I'll do it.
Speaker A
- Oh. - But as for ghosts, I'm afraid not. I only believe in Gemini.
Speaker A
- What? - Oh, technology. - Oh. - Not you, not you. - AI. - Ghosts hate technology.
Speaker A
- Gem AI. - Gem AI? - That's good. - Tapas. - I don't really believe in ghosts, but I mean some places spook me out, so B.
Speaker A
- I believe family lasts forever, and I believe that the house that you live in has your spirit within it, your burial.
Speaker A
I have my parents and their parents and their parents in jars. - Ooh. - Jars? - Oh, all right.
Speaker A
- Yeah. - Jars? - (beep) I didn't connect. - Should I tell anyone I have a son?
Speaker A
(group laughs) - Whoa. Whoa. - That's good, that's good. - I'm not gonna tell anybody that I have full body tattoos.
Speaker A
(group laughs) Fully covered in tattoos. - [Spencer] That was a crazy lie. - That was a crazy lie.
Speaker A
- She asked if he had tattoos, and he was like, I got a couple little ones.
Speaker A
- He's like covered. - He's like, I got a couple little ones. - And he's covered in tattoos. - And he winks to the camera.
Speaker A
- And he has a son. - Which did she react when she saw them?
Speaker A
- She liked them. - She liked them. - She liked them. - Oh, good.
Speaker A
- And then they ended it. - Oh. - Their sparkle died. - I actually think it's like really good.
Speaker A
- What is? - Okay, not to be a downer, but if you had one day left to live, what would you do?
Speaker A
- [Angela] God, I got it. - God. Everyone says I need to be more positive.
Speaker A
- I think I get why everyone cheats on her. (group laughs) - (beep). - It's so crazy.
Speaker A
I just feel like I'm a good time and I don't understand why people don't understand that.
Speaker A
Anyways, if you were to (beep) die the next day, what would you do? A, max out my credit card for the wildest night of my life.
Speaker A
Yeah. Spend it with my closest family and friends. Yeah. Head to the beach and enjoy the (beep) sunset in peace.
Speaker A
Yeah. - Well, we know what Sparkle Chanse is gonna go for. (group laughs) - Yeah.
Speaker A
- Yeah. All right, do something fun, I love to have a good time and laugh.
Speaker A
- I said A, I am gonna max out my credit cards, I'm gonna have a crazy night.
Speaker A
My buddies and I, we're gonna go to Dave & Buster's, maybe we hit a couple strip clubs.
Speaker A
We're gonna have a great time. It's gonna be awesome. I feel like this is now the time to let everyone know I've cheated on all my partners before.
Speaker A
But no, I'm gonna be different now. (Amanda sighs) - I'm gonna max out my credit card and finally pay my employees and pay for the rent at my salon.
Speaker A
(Amanda laughs) (Arasha laughs) - I haven't actually shared this, but I don't want anyone to, you know, date me just 'cause I have a lot of money.
Speaker A
So I've really been trying to keep that on the quiet. I chose A, max out my credit card.
Speaker A
- Yeah, I want my family to, I want to like build like generational debt.
Speaker A
So I'm gonna max out my credit card and the surviving members of my family have to pay for it for generations.
Speaker A
- You know what I care about. - Oh. - [Ian] Family. - What I care about is making money off of my family.
Speaker A
- Oh. - Oh. - Oh, my God. - I need good cameras to film them in their pajamas.
Speaker A
(Shayne laughs) (Chanse laughs) - Confessional. That family guy- - [Arasha] So scary. - Is not a (beep) good guy. - [Spencer] Whoa.
Speaker A
- [Amanda] He's a serial killer. - Whoa, I love Family Guy. - [Chanse] Whoa.
Speaker A
- Hey. No, Family Guy's not a good show. Anyways, I don't know why everyone cheats on me.
Speaker A
- Whoa, hot tip. - Anyways. I'm just kidding, I love Family Guy. A, Max out my credit card.
Speaker A
(Angela screams) Who had A? - I had A. - Me. - Did we all have A?
Speaker A
- Oh, my God, I connected with all of you guys. - It was our pitcher.
Speaker A
- Oh, my God. - It was our pitcher. - I see a future- - I can't tell if it's the robot, but I'm like rock hard right now.
Speaker A
- What do you mean? The robot's in your pants. - I've connected now with Arasha and Amanda.
Speaker A
I have to make a decision. My, I, my number, I'm just- - Whoa. - Oh, boy.
Speaker A
- Can you propose at any point? - Once you have three, yeah. - Yeah.
Speaker A
- [Audience Effect] Ooh. - [Amanda] Yeah? - [Arasha] Oh, no. - [Chanse] What? - Oh, my God.
Speaker A
If I don't get with my number one Sparkle Shayne, I don't know what I'm gonna do, but someone's gonna get injured.
Speaker A
(Angela laughs) (Shayne laughs) I'm gonna fold you like a camp chair. Anyways- - Jesus. - God, I love being here.
Speaker A
- Whose turn is it? - I don't know, I'm done. - Straight, uh, Sparkle Shayne.
Speaker A
- Sparkle Shayne. - Straight Shayne. - Straight Shayne. - Straight Shayne. - Oh, shit.
Speaker A
- Don't. - Wait, no. - No. No. - Are you gonna? - Look, I see you walking over to Amanda's pod.
Speaker A
I'm gonna head there too. - We'll make her decide. - Yeah, we'll make her decide.
Speaker A
This is gonna be something that they should have done on Love Is Blind a long time ago.
Speaker A
- That's so true. - All right, I'm gonna propose to her. Because like, honestly, like everybody here's my number one, but like Amanda's like my number one.
Speaker A
- [Ian] For sure, bro. - You know what? (suspenseful music) I think she's my number two, you can go.
Speaker A
(group laughs) - Oh. - Whoa. - I'm acting like I hear all of it, I don't.
Speaker A
I'm just like, oh, this room is cool. - All right, fine. Yeah whatever. - I look forward to getting drunk with you at the hotel lobby and going, "That's you?" (Shayne laughs) - Okay, there's something I have to do.
Speaker A
- Do not say yes. (producers laugh) (suspenseful music) Do not say yes. - Good luck, girl.
Speaker A
We really hope this goes the way that you want it to. - Thanks, I really hope so too, 'cause if he doesn't- - [Arasha] Yeah.
Speaker A
- [Angela] All that's left- - No, don't even say that. - If I get left with the IBS girl, the weird tech bro, or the Christian dad, I'm gonna (beep) myself.
Speaker A
- Do I stand? - I'm not a follower yet. - Trust your gut, girl.
Speaker A
- Girly, whatever happens, we'll be in the women's quarters on lubed up yoga mats drinking electrolytes with bananas.
Speaker A
- [Arasha] Right. - Thanks girls. - The toilet will be open. We promise no one else is gonna be there.
Speaker A
- Bananas covered in electrolytes and so much love and encouragement. - Thanks girls. - Box of tissues, box of toilet paper.
Speaker A
- Okay, thanks girls. I'm just like, ugh. I just, I cannot get cheated on again, you know?
Speaker A
- I really do think he might be the one that would cheat out of everyone in the pod.
Speaker A
- Probably. - No, okay, girls, all right. - The tapas are ready. - Yeah, thanks girls.
Speaker A
- I'm a new guy, I can't wait to see her. I like, you know, in my head I picture just this like blonde, like five foot tall, you know, just like, I don't know, just like super sweet person.
Speaker A
Like yeah, just like, totally. I can see it now. But like, you know, I know it's like blind so it's like whatever.
Speaker A
(Angela laughs) - I can't wait to see my prince. And he's gonna be six-four.
Speaker A
(Shayne laughs) He's gonna be tall, dark and handsome. There's literally gonna be a bulge in his pants and I'm not gonna have to guess.
Speaker A
(Shayne laughing) (producers laughing) 'Cause I don't wanna guess. And he's going to love me forever and he will never leave me and will take his phone.
Speaker A
I just wanna see who's texting him. Dark hair, facial hair, tall. Here we come.
Speaker A
Here we come. - [Producer] Here we come. - Here we come. - Here we come.
Speaker A
Here we come. - Three, two, one. - One. (dramatic music) - Oh. - Oh, whoa. - Oh, my God.
Speaker A
- This is, oh, this is crazy. - [Angela] It's like- - Wow. - It's actually like watching- - Oh, my God.
Speaker A
Oh, do we hug? - Hey. - Oh, my God. - [Shayne] Oh, wow, yeah.
Speaker A
- Oh, my God, I shoulda have worn heels. - Yeah. No, no, you're fine, you're fine.
Speaker A
- Oh, my God, you smell so good. - I'm like, I'm still putting the voice to the face. - The voice to the face.
Speaker A
Yeah. - Yeah. - She doesn't like it. - Crazy. - She doesn't like it.
Speaker A
- It's like so weird. - It's wild. - I'm like, I'm shaking. - Yeah yeah, so- - Oh yeah.
Speaker A
Oh my God, of course, oh, my God. - Will you marry me? - Oh, my God, you did so well.
Speaker A
- Thank you. - You did such a good job. Oh, my God, I love it.
Speaker A
- Production gave me a couple options and I chose this one. (group laughs) So yeah. - Yeah.
Speaker A
- [Amanda] Oh my God, okay. - Sparkle Amanda, will you marry me? - Do you promise to love me in all of our days when I'm old, okay?
Speaker A
- She's gonna break his balls in half. - And I've gained a little bit of weight and my hair's falling out and I'm alone.
Speaker A
And I get a little paranoid that the government's chasing me and I've got a lot of credit card debt.
Speaker A
It's like, I don't know. And there's like, my car broke down, and shit's getting (beep) nuts with my family.
Speaker A
- [Arasha] I think he's gonna be sick. (group laughing) - My mom is being a (beep) as she always is.
Speaker A
My dad is like a son of a bitch. And my sisters are nuts. They're gonna live with us.
Speaker A
Oh, they're gonna (beep) live with us 'cause they have to. - Yeah, all right. - [Amanda] And Amy's a drunk.
Speaker A
- Honey, honey, let him learn that. - Amy's a drunk. And she cut me one time, I have like a slash on my back.
Speaker A
- Honey, just- - And I get stitches a lot. - Girl, just say yes.
Speaker A
Girl. - And my gallbladder, my gallbladder has burst and I have literally almost got septic.
Speaker A
(group laughing) Will you love me through all of that? Also, my asshole is closed for medical reasons.
Speaker A
(group laughing) And with all that- - [Chanse] Oh, my God. - And with all that, will you promise you'll stay?
Speaker A
- You're asking him, "Are you gonna stay?" - And I say yes. - [Chanse] Oh, my God. - I say yes.
Speaker A
- Yeah. - [Angela] Oh, my God. - True love. - Oh, my God, it's so, is that a garnet?
Speaker A
- Yeah, I think so. - Okay, okay, we gotta go. - [Arasha] Wow. - You're crying.
Speaker A
I'm so happy. - [Shayne] Yeah, me too. - [Angela] Do that out. - Yeah.
Speaker A
(group laughs) - I'm so happy. And you know what? We can get lifts in your shoes.
Speaker A
(group laughs) - Holy (beep). Great. - Oh, my God. We kissed for real on camera.
Speaker A
- [Ian] Oh, it doesn't matter. (group laughing) - Oh, my God, we get a kiss already, look at that. - You guys have a kiss.
Speaker A
- [Angela] One each. - Oh. - And where are the child tokens? - [Angela] There's one each, you get one. - (laughs) Jesus.
Speaker A
- That's super sucks for you guys. - Children in pajamas token. - Oh, my God.
Speaker A
Don't worry, babe, nobody will ever steal you from, steal me from you. - [Angela] 'Cause people can steal.
Speaker A
- Oh, I know. - Like, I'm super faithful. - I don't think I like anybody here.
Speaker A
- One of my fondest memories was of my mother. She used to give us haircuts in the garage with a bolt.
Speaker A
- Haircuts? I think I like someone. - So that's not a confession, that's just you saying that out loud.
Speaker A
- That reminded me of my small business. I believe ghosting is, A, a necessary evil, B, horrible, C, saves time.
Speaker A
Daddy Warbucks. - Ghosting saves time. It's quick and efficient. - Is that what you did to your children?
Speaker A
- What? No. That's what I did to my grandparents and their grandparents because they are dead.
Speaker A
So they are now ghosts. - Yeah, I'm kind of into like time maxing and breakup maxing, so I'm also C, save time.
Speaker A
- IBS? - It's Arasha. - Sorry. (group laughs) - IBS Arasha. - Sparkle IBS.
Speaker A
- Thank you. - IBS. (Angela laughs) - Sparkle IBS. - Listen, ghosting is tough, but honestly you just put it through a generator and somebody tells you exactly what to say and it's a necessary evil.
Speaker A
- I said C, saves time. Plus I do have ghosts in my apartment so like ghosting is cool.
Speaker A
- Are they friendly ghosts? - No. - Shit. - No, they're very mean. (dramatic music) Babe?
Speaker A
- Uh-oh, she didn't like that one. - Little hiccup. - Already? That quick? - Obviously, like I would never do that to you.
Speaker A
- I don't think you'll get a kiss. - 'Cause like we're like engaged so like I wouldn't do that.
Speaker A
- Oh, okay. So I would say that ghosting is horrible. It's awful. It's rude.
Speaker A
- Shit. - It's a (beep) nightmare and I'll find you. I'll find you. - Yeah. - So this is, I'm not- - Did that happen to you, Sparkle Amanda?
Speaker A
- Oh yeah, I've been cheated on multiple times- - No, the question- - No, no, ghosted.
Speaker A
Where you ghosted? - Yeah, I've been ghosted a lot. One time a guy, literally we were ordering, and I got all the food and the check and he was gone.
Speaker A
- Oh no. - Yeah. A raw bar, we ordered the whole (beep) raw bar.
Speaker A
So much, so many oysters. - Did you like leave the table? - No, I (beep) downed 60 oysters.
Speaker A
- But now you're married, you don't have to worry about it. - Damn. - Yeah, and you're gonna like oysters too.
Speaker A
- That's why your gallbladder's gonna (beep) burst. - My gallbladder? - Gallbladder? - My gallbladder.
Speaker A
- My gallbladder is gonna burst again. - Look, we call them woman bladders. - Girl bladder.
Speaker A
- I didn't get a kiss. - I did C, saves time because I'm a small business owner.
Speaker A
- Yeah. - Yeah. - Oh, am I finally connecting with two of them? - Finally. - Yeah, finally.
Speaker A
- My first heart with Chanse and Ian. - Does he still mark down connections?
Speaker A
- [Anders] No. - What are you- - Oh, I don't mark on, I thought I still- - You getting kisses now. - Drama in Cabo.
Speaker A
Go girly - Shayne is still trying to kiss people. - Yeah, literally, what is happening?
Speaker A
- Next thing I wanna know about you guys, I have a tendency to, A hoard.
Speaker A
- Jesus. - Damn. - That was, I don't even know how about that. - Just wanna make sure that that's clear.
Speaker A
- Hoard. - Hoard. - Hoard, A. - [Spencer] Hoard AF. - That's good. - Throw everything I don't need away, is B, keep most gifts and all the cards too, is C.
Speaker A
- What? What? - What the (beep) is- - How is that question? - It's like- - Keep most gifts cards too.
Speaker A
- [Amanda] Hoard. - It's like what do you do? It's like- - Hey, bucko, choose the same one as me.
Speaker A
- We got this. (Shayne laughs) (Amanda laughs) - Or your balls are gonna be in a vice.
Speaker A
- Yeah, for sure. - Okay. - I'm really about like I'm just room maxing right now.
Speaker A
So I throw out everything away, B. - Oh, shit. I would, I, family. What is the question?
Speaker A
- Jesus. - [Angela] It doesn't make sense. - We make a scrapbook out of the cards that we keep.
Speaker A
- [Group] Oh. - That's sweet, that's sweet. - B, throw everything away that I don't need.
Speaker A
- Someone's not getting it. - 'Cause all I need is my husband right here next to me, this bucko right here. - Yeah, for sure.
Speaker A
I wrote C- - [Ian] Oh no. - 'Cause I keep like gifts and stuff, you know, things, I think, I don't have anything from my exes.
Speaker A
But you know, like I wouldn't keep that. - Looks like we're having a burn pile in the back.
Speaker A
- No, no, no, no. - Burning that shit up. - No, I don't have any of that.
Speaker A
But that's just typically what I would probably to answer that. - Oh, my God.
Speaker A
We're gonna have such weird eye contact at the hotel lobby, C. - Ugh. Oh no. - Yikes.
Speaker A
Yeah, well, you see, I like expensive things, so I like to keep most gifts, but I'm not all about the money.
Speaker A
- Oh, my God. - So who did I connect with? - Me. - Dog eat dog world.
Speaker A
- All right, everyone, this is a serious- - Dog. - What is that? - It's dog eat dog world in the pod.
Speaker A
- Yeah, I like that. - In the pod. - Someone should probably take that alcohol away from her.
Speaker A
- No, I'm sober. (group laughs) - No, I'm sober. - No, she's like that. - Yeah, she's like that.
Speaker A
- Okay, I'm ready. - Okay guys, this is a very serious question, and all the answers are very serious.
Speaker A
- Okay. - If this is about crypto, I walk outta this pod. - I wish.
Speaker A
If you had one personal wish, A, to have enough money to solve my problems.
Speaker A
B, to have good health. C, to have superpowers. - I feel like the answer to this one's pretty obvious.
Speaker A
So- - Is it? - Yeah. Yeah, I think we know. (producers laughing) - Yeah, we totally know.
Speaker A
- I know we're still in the pods, but sometimes when I walk past portraits on the walls, the eyes move and follow me.
Speaker A
- [Angela] What? That's so nuts. - I hear Amanda laughing in the background. - Cool shirt.
Speaker A
(group laughs) - Nice pants today. - I like those pants - Okay, I'll answer.
Speaker A
I'm going to say A, to have enough money to solve my problems. - I'm gonna say C, superpowers.
Speaker A
- Oh, thank God. Yes, it's C, superpowers. - Oh, my God, thank God. - Yeah, wow.
Speaker A
- Let's get a kiss. - Get a kiss. - Get a kiss. - Yeah.
Speaker A
- We're so alike. - Oh, my God. - We're so alike. - Soulmates, am I right?
Speaker A
- Yeah, we're doing great. - We're doing, we're killing it. - We're doing so good.
Speaker A
- Money just has to solve my problems so I can get out of the foreclosure with the salon.
Speaker A
- Okay. - Foreclosure? Foreclosure? - So I get outta foreclosure with this salon. - Well, I already have money, but I just wanna be able to play my sport so I want good health.
Speaker A
- What's your sport? - [Group] Pickleball. - He doesn't listen. - The family guy sucks.
Speaker A
- That's a hobby not a sport. - [Arasha] It's a sport. - They don't compete in (beep) pickleball, do they?
Speaker A
- If I'm wearing a skirt, it's a sport. - What? - Guys, the answer was simple and you all failed, it's C.
Speaker A
- No, we didn't fail. - Yeah, but I can't connect with you. - We succeeded.
Speaker A
- Do we get extra kisses because we got it? - No, I think two kisses, I think we get one kiss, I think that's all we get. - We should get extra kisses.
Speaker A
- Are your eyes straying to crypto boy? - No. - You dirty dog. - I want a kiss, I want extra kisses.
Speaker A
- Hey, I don't think we're allowed to have extra. - We're allowed to have any extra kisses.
Speaker A
- Me making glances at the producer's just like- - Help, help, help. - What's the biggest turnoff?
Speaker A
A, narcissism, B, body odor, C, bad style. (lively music) (group laughs) - What were the options?
Speaker A
- Yeah. - A, narcissism. B, body odor. C, bad style. - You're really putting some sauce on B.
Speaker A
- Yeah. (group laughs) I think I know which one you don't like. - Body odor.
Speaker A
- Body odor. - This is tough. - I don't mean to interrupt the round- (Angela gasps) - Oh, my God.
Speaker A
- But Chanse. - What? - I have something to say. - What do you wanna say?
Speaker A
- Stand. - Oh, okay. - Stand. - [Chanse] Okay. - Oh, (beep) shit, I'm getting left with crypto boy.
Speaker A
Fucking shit. Oh, (beep ) I'm getting- - [Shayne] It's not too late. - I'm getting left with the guy who gets jacked off by a robot.
Speaker A
(group laughs) Oh, (beep)- - You say that like's a bad thing. - I will be looking straight to her birthing hips.
Speaker A
(group laughs) I'll try to make it as subtle as possible, but that's the first thing that my eyes will be going to.
Speaker A
(group laughing) I'll try to play it cool. - Honestly- - Oh, Chanse (laughing). - I'm not really looking for much.
Speaker A
I feel like I'm gonna just keep my expectations low and I'm just gonna try to see his heart.
Speaker A
I'm gonna look and I'm gonna see who is really behind his soul. 'Cause I just want a buddy.
Speaker A
Three two one. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, wee-wah. (group laughs) I love you. I freaking love you.
Speaker A
(dramatic music) You look amazing, you look incredible. - You look so cute. - Yeah. - Yeah.
Speaker A
- Thank you. - Can you do a spin? - Yes. (group laughs) - Wow, wow.
Speaker A
- You really look amazing. - Thank you. - Incredible. - Thank you. - All natural. - Yeah, yeah.
Speaker A
- Nice. (Angela laughs) - You're killing me. - I'm sorry, I'm just so nervous.
Speaker A
- Yeah, me too, sorry. I should get down probably. - Oh no, I should, I should.
Speaker A
- No, I'll do it, I'll do it. - Okay, I mean I was gonna- - Oh no, not the Shayne Dawson two knees.
Speaker A
(group laughs) - Sparkle Arasha, will you spend the rest of your life with me?
Speaker A
Make me the happiest man on earth and be the mother to my children. - Oh, you want kids?
Speaker A
- Oh. - Yeah. - You didn't have this necessary conversation in the pods? All you talked about was your thoughts on ghosting?
Speaker A
- I don't want kids. - [Shayne] Oh. - But- - Can you get past that?
Speaker A
- Yeah, of course, we can adopt. - Oh no, I don't want to be a mother at all.
Speaker A
- But I wanna be. (group gasps) (tense music) (dramatic music) I think I'm in love.
Speaker A
- I want you to be the mother of my children. - [Arasha] Don't leave me.
Speaker A
- Families are split apart and sometimes they regrow and that doesn't make them any less family.
Speaker A
I'm in this for life. - The fact that you proposed and you lied to me.
Speaker A
- They're joking. - Do I not jack you off enough? - Shayne, I literally lubed him up right before- - No, he's joking, he's obviously joking.
Speaker A
- Jack off city, babe, and I have lube. - [Arasha] All right, hear me out- - [Ian] Okay, and we're out.
Speaker A
- [Angela] I'm having an absolute meltdown. (group chattering) (dramatic music)
Topics:Love Is BlindSmosh Gamesdating gamecomedyblind datingimprovsocial mediarelationshipsparodyreality show
