A thoughtful reflection on judgment, kindness, and embracing subjective differences to foster understanding and growth.
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Key Takeaways
- Judgment is often misplaced as tastes are subjective and personal.
- Curiosity and kindness transform criticism into understanding and compassion.
- Strength lies in kindness, emotional control, and empathy, not in meanness or judgment.
- Effort and courage in the face of failure are more valuable than external criticism.
- Embracing differences fosters growth, inclusivity, and mutual support.
What the video covers
- Humans often judge others as if their opinions are universal truths, despite tastes being subjective.
- There is no objective standard of beauty or taste; differences should be appreciated, not dominated.
- Curiosity replaces judgment with understanding, compassion, and appreciation.
- Kindness is a sign of strength, requiring emotional regulation and empathy, not weakness.
- Meanness stems from insecurity and scarcity mindset, while kindness fosters abundance and growth.
- The ability to notice good in life and others enhances positivity and relationships.
- The quote from Theodore Roosevelt highlights the value of effort and courage over criticism.
- Choosing to be 'in the arena' means embracing risk, failure, and growth rather than judging from the sidelines.
- Differences expand our worldview and provide room for everyone to succeed without harming others.
- Kindness and humility in opinions promote a more inclusive and supportive society.
Full Transcript — Download SRT & Markdown
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Why do we as people feel entitled to judge others as if our own opinions are universal laws?
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How can someone's outfit be ugly if they think it's cool?
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How can you make fun of someone's music taste if millions of people think it's cool?
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How come humans are so quick to judge as if it's our job and as if our opinion matters to anyone but us?
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Why is it so hard and difficult for us to accept that our tastes and preferences are entirely individual, that no matter how popular or unpopulated they are?
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There is no such thing as an objective standard of beauty.
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This doesn't mean that we stop disagreeing, in fact, I believe that it encourages it.
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Because when we stop judging, we stop competing over taste and start appreciating differences instead of trying to dominate it.
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I heard a quote from Ted Lasso that goes, be curious and not judgmental, and that shift alone changes everything.
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Curiosity shifts criticism into understanding, curiosity, compassion and appreciation changes the way we view the world.
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And that provides you with so much gratitude and grace.
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Why be judgmental when you can choose to be in awe of the world that we live in?
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So humble your opinions, stop assuming that your preferences are universal laws.
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And stop trying to win debates on things that are all subjective in taste.
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Because subjectivity doesn't flatten reality, it in fact deepens, it widens our own view and thinking of the world.
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It reminds us that differences are not threats, they are expansions.
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The truth is that the sky is big enough for all the birds in the sky to fly without their wings touching each other.
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We can all succeed in our chosen field without spoiling and hurting each other.
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And instead help and improve one another.
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There is room for everyone, there is dignity.
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In allowing everyone to have space to grow and to learn from each other.
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So remember that kindness is peak performance and high status.
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Kindness itself requires metabolic abundance, the capacity to override primal impulses and urges.
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Regulate our own emotions and extend our empathy.
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It is strength under control.
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Not weakness disguised as softness.
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Meanness is dirty energy.
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High cortisol, inflammatory and an exhaustive function.
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It is the by-product of insecurity and scarcity thinking.
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The truth is the amount of good things in your life.
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Depends on your ability to notice them.
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And perhaps the same thing applies to the goodness in people.
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It depends on your ability to see it.
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So stop rushing into judging others.
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And instead see the good and appreciate others.
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As Theodore Roosevelt once said.
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It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles.
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Or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
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The credit belongs to the man who's actually in the arena.
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Whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood.
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Who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again and again.
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Because there is no effort without error and shortcoming.
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But who knows the great enthusiasms.
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The great devotions, who spends himself in a worthy cause.
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Who at best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement.
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And at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.
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So that his place shall never be with the cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
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There is so much to take away from this.
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But if there is one thing that you remember.
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It is that the critic stands outside and judges, whereas the one in the arena lives.
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Risks, fails, and grows.
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So if you're going to choose a side.
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Choose the man in the arena.
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Choose kindness.
Topics:judgmentkindnesssubjectivityempathycuriositygrowthinclusivityTheodore Rooseveltself-improvementcompassion











