Speaker A
لقد بحثت حتى تعثرت على فقه النفس. إنه سعي لفهم النفس على طريقة خالقها. مراجعك مختلفة؟
حلقة تناقش فقه النفس كمنهج لفهم النفس البشرية على طريقة خالقها، وتناقش الفرق بينه وبين علم النفس الحديث.
Ask about this video. Answers come from its transcript only — with the timestamp, so you can check them.
Generated from the transcript and can be wrong — check the timestamp.
Key Takeaways
- فقه النفس يقدم رؤية شاملة للنفس البشرية تجمع بين الجسد والروح على أساس إسلامي.
- علم النفس الحديث محدود بفلسفات مادية ولا يعكس حقيقة النفس كما في فقه النفس.
- العلاج النفسي يجب أن يركز على تعديل الأفكار والسلوكيات وليس فقط المشاعر.
- الفهم الصحيح للنفس يساعد في التعامل مع الأمراض النفسية بطريقة متوافقة مع الدين.
- التراث الإسلامي يحتوي على علوم نفسية متقدمة يجب استعادتها وتطويرها.
What the video covers
- فقه النفس هو سعي لفهم النفس البشرية على طريقة خالقها، مع التركيز على الجوانب الروحية والذاتية.
- علم النفس الحديث يعتمد على فلسفات مادية ويغفل الجانب الروحي للنفس، مما يجعله مختلفاً تماماً عن فقه النفس.
- التشخيصات والعلاجات في فقه النفس تختلف جذرياً عن علم النفس الحديث، حيث يركز على الأفكار والسلوكيات وليس فقط المشاعر.
- فقه النفس لا يقتصر على الطب النفسي الدوائي بل يركز على العلاج النفسي غير الدوائي.
- هناك نقد لمحاولة التوفيق بين علم النفس الغربي والإسلام، حيث توجد تعارضات في الأصول والثقافة.
- يتم تناول مفاهيم مثل الحزن، اليأس، الخوف، والفرق بينها من منظور فقه النفس.
- يُناقش تأثير البيئة الاجتماعية والإعلام على النفس وكيفية تنظيم المدخلات لتجنب الأضرار النفسية.
- تُبرز الحلقة أهمية العودة إلى التراث الإسلامي في فهم النفس بدلاً من الاعتماد فقط على النظريات الغربية.
- تُشرح العلاقة بين الجسد والنفس وكيفية تشكل النفس وأمراضها من منظور فقه النفس.
- تُعرض أمثلة من القرآن الكريم والسيرة النبوية لتوضيح مفاهيم نفسية مثل الحزن والرضا واليقين.
Chapters
- 00:00مقدمة وتعريف فقه النفس
- 09:12النقد والتحديات في التوفيق بين الإسلام وعلم النفس الحديث
- 19:22أمثلة على المشكلات النفسية من منظور فقه النفس
- 37:40الجسد والنفس: التعريف والتكوين
- 47:39تأثير البيئة الاجتماعية والإعلام على النفس
- 62:15الفرق بين الحزن واليأس وأثرهما النفسي
- 74:02أهمية التراث الإسلامي في فهم النفس
- 93:35خاتمة وتوصيات للعلاج النفسي الإسلامي
Full Transcript — Download SRT & Markdown
Speaker A
ما هي مخاطر أمراض القلب؟ إنها مدخل للعديد مما نسميه الأمراض النفسية. المشكلة في علم النفس الحديث في التشخيص والأصول والمنهجية. لماذا كان عليك تفكيكها بهذه الطريقة المحددة؟
Speaker A
"أنا أعيش من أجل زوجي وأولادي"، هذا خطأ. لا أعتقد أن أحداً يستمع إلى الحلقة يظن...
Speaker A
أنه يجب أن يقارن حياته بغيره. خطأ شائع هو خداع الآخرين بتحقيق السعادة. من بلغ عمر الثلاثين يصعب تغييره. وعندما يرون مثل هذه المدخلات والمعلومات الجديدة، ماذا يجب أن يفعلوا؟
Speaker A
عملنا أثناء العلاج يركز ليس على المشاعر، بل على الأفكار؟ - وعلى السلوكيات. في فقه النفس، الإنسان يتكون من نفس وجسد؟
Speaker A
مم يتكون النفس؟ كيف تتشكل النفس؟ حكيم لكنه مضل؟ - كيف ذلك؟ - القرآن لم يذم العقل أبداً. المدخلات هي أول شيء...
Speaker A
لدينا الآن مرض يسمى متلازمة باربي. - صورة نمطية عن النسوية؟ - هل زرت طبيب نفسي من قبل؟
Speaker A
مرحباً بك في مكانك، نفس الموضع. دكتور، نود الحديث عن فقه النفس، المنهجية التي تخصصت واهتممت بها، والتي تشغل معظم جهودك، سواء وُصفت كموضوع، علم أو فقه.
Speaker A
لهذا أود أن أستكشف هذا الموضوع معك اليوم. أعلم أنك درست الطب، ثم علم النفس، ثم الطب النفسي، ثم عدت إلى العلاج النفسي. واصلت البحث حتى وجدت فقه النفس. ما المميز في فقه النفس؟
Speaker A
الذي لا يوجد في الطب أو علم النفس العام؟ سؤال جيد كمقدمة. أردت فقط التعليق على نقطة، خوفاً من أن تُفهم خطأ رغم ما ذكرته بشكل صحيح. عند التخصص، كنت أنوي التخصص في علم النفس،
Speaker A
لكنني لم أستمر لأنني شعرت أن استخدام الطب ليس ما أريده. سعيت للعلاج النفسي غير الدوائي. لهذا درست علم النفس ثم تحولت إلى علم النفس الإكلينيكي غير الدوائي. لماذا أذكر هذا؟ لأن البعض قد يظن أنني طبيب نفسي دوائي،
Speaker A
لكني لست كذلك، كنت أعلم أن هذا ليس ما أريده. الآن، ما المختلف في فقه النفس عن غيره بشكل عام؟
Speaker A
هذا يعيدني إلى تعريفه. من الجيد أن نبدأ بالتعريف لتوفير وقتنا. فقه النفس كما أعرّفه هو سعي لفهم النفس على طريقة خالقها.
Speaker A
هذا هو. سعي لفهم النفس على طريقة خالقها. عندما نقول "لفهم النفس"، يعني معرفة ما هي، جوهرها وهويتها، مكوناتها: النفس والجسد، أمراضها، الأسباب والعلاجات،
Speaker A
كل ذلك "على طريقة وهداية خالقها". إذن، ماذا عن الباقي؟ علم النفس هو منحدر من الفلسفات المتراكمة، معظمها ينشأ من اليونان وما بعدها،
Speaker A
والتي تستبعد تماماً الجانب الروحي. في علم النفس، أنت كائن عضوي مادي،
Speaker A
يتكون من مكونات، وناقلات عصبية وأشياء أخرى. لهذا يمكننا القول إن علم النفس يعاملك كحيوان متطور،
Speaker A
وهذا أبعد ما يكون عن فقه النفس. - بعيد جداً؟ - بالتأكيد.
Speaker A
هم حتى يتعارضون كما سأشرح قريباً. هم يتعارضون. نحن ندرس هذا الكائن المسمى الإنسان، لكن تعريفهم للإنسان مختلف عن تعريفي. - مراجعك مختلفة؟ - نعم، الأصول مختلفة. الأسماء والمصطلحات مختلفة أيضاً.
Speaker A
هذا بخصوص علم النفس. بينما علم النفس العام وفروعه مثل علم النفس التربوي،
Speaker A
أحياناً أصفه بما يُعرف بعلم النفس. لا أحب أن أسميه كذلك، لأنه ليس علماً ولا يعرف النفس البشرية كما نفعل نحن.
Speaker A
كما أنه منحدر من فلسفات أخرى مثل الهندوسية، الطاوية، البوذية، الكونفوشيوسية أو غيرها.
Speaker A
تأثر أيضاً بالمنهجيات اليونانية وغيرها، إلى جانب بعض التعاليم الفارسية. كل هذا أثر على العديد من المدارس المعروفة في التاريخ الحديث. لا أحب الدخول في التفاصيل الآن.
Speaker A
لكن لا يمكنك ذكر اسم مؤسس مدرسة نفسية دون أن تجد تأثيراً من فلسفة إلحادية،
Speaker A
بينما البعض الآخر يتأثر بتجربته الشخصية. قد يكون لديه مشكلة كره والده في طفولته،
Speaker A
ثم تتطور هذه الفلسفة لاحقاً إلى مدرسة نفسية.
Speaker A
آخر يكره والدته، مما يؤثر على مدرسته النفسية. الأول هو فرويد، بالمناسبة. الثاني هو ماسلو مع هرم الاحتياجات.
Speaker A
آخر لديه مشكلة كبيرة في عدم السيطرة على نفسه ورغباته. زوجته كانت مريضة بالسرطان بينما هو ذهب إلى علاقات متعددة وخانها،
Speaker A
ثم أسس مدرسة تدور حول عدم الحكم على الحالات، مثل كارل روجرز ومدرسته. وهكذا، وإريك إريكسون، الباحث عن الهوية،
Speaker A
رجل وُلد دون أن يعرف والده، فسماه إريك إريكسون، بمعنى أنه ابن نفسه، وهكذا.
Speaker A
عادةً ألخص الفرق بين فقه النفس والآخرين. من المهم فهم مسألة عندما أذكر فقه النفس،
Speaker A
ليس فقط مدرستي التعليمية، بل هو سعي لفهم النفس على طريقة خالقها.
Speaker A
قد يُطلق على فقه النفس اسم علم النفس الإسلامي من قبل البعض، أو المنظور الإسلامي لعلم النفس.
Speaker A
كان هذا سؤالي التالي: ما الفرق بين فقه النفس والآخرين؟
Speaker A
أختلف مع بعض الأسماء الأخرى، ومع بعض الإخوة الشرفاء الساعين، أننا ما زلنا عالقين في الحلقة،
Speaker A
لا نحل المشكلة. أحياناً يسألونني لماذا لا أحب اسم علم النفس الإسلامي؟
Speaker A
أرد عليهم بأنه مثل وجود باربي محجبة. مشكلتك الأساسية مع باربي؟
Speaker A
المشكلة محاولة التوفيق بين نظام كامل وثقافة مع الإسلام.
Speaker A
فبغض النظر كم تحاول، عقليتك مرتبطة بثقافتهم المتفوقة،
Speaker A
التي قدمت النفس البشرية إلى المختبر التجريبي، بينما نحن نتبع تعاليم الله ونبيه،
Speaker A
التي تشعر تجاهها بعقدة نقص، لدرجة أنك قد تجد بعض الغربيين،
Speaker A
وهو أمر محزن عندما يصدر من الغرب وليس من بعض أهل دينك،
Speaker A
لا يملكون نفس مستوى الفخر.
Speaker A
يسألون المسلمين: أين نظرياتكم؟ لماذا لم نسمع شيئاً منكم حتى الآن؟
Speaker A
هم أنفسهم يشعرون بالأسف عليكم، بعضهم بالطبع، لأن معظمهم لا يهتم ولا يريدكم.
Speaker A
ويمكنك أن تنظر في أي كتاب علم نفس الآن، أو أي كتاب عن تاريخ علم النفس،
Speaker A
ستجد التاريخ منذ ما قبل المسيح،
Speaker A
حتى العصور الوسطى، ثم يقفزون إلى التاريخ الحديث،
Speaker A
وعندما تأسس مختبر فونت.
Speaker A
لكن، ماذا عن عصرنا الذهبي؟
Speaker A
أين الكتب المتقدمة من القرون الثلاثة الأولى؟ أين البَلخي أو المسكوي؟
Speaker A
أين أبو بكر الرازي وأعمالهم؟
Speaker A
الناس الذين وصفوا الكآبة بطريقة تنافس الوصف الحالي. أين كل ذلك؟
Speaker A
حتى عن قصد، كشخص لديه كتاب مشهور،
Speaker A
درس لستة قرون بينما نُسب إلى غربي،
Speaker A
حتى عرف مستشرق آخر أنه مسروق من عالم مسلم،
Speaker A
في حين أن الآخر نسبه له لستة قرون،
Speaker A
فيه وصف دقيق للاكتئاب ينافس الوصف الحديث الحالي.
Speaker A
على أي حال، ما أريد أن أوصله هنا، لدي شريحة تظهر شخصاً واقفاً،
Speaker A
أمامه طريقان، أحدهما أملس والآخر متعرج،
Speaker A
يبدآن متوازيين، ثم يتقاطعان قبل أن يتفرقا مجدداً.
Speaker A
هذا هو الفرق بين فقه النفس والآخرين.
Speaker A
يختلفون في الأسس والمفاهيم والأصول. سأشرح ذلك أكثر بعد قليل.
Speaker A
يتقاطعون في استخدام بعض الأدوات،
Speaker A
ثم يتفرقون في أغراضهم. كيف يختلفون في الأصول والأسس؟ أنا أنشأ من وجود خالق خلق كائناً وأرسل رسالات،
Speaker A
بينما هو ينشأ من كائن يحاول أن...
Speaker A
Cooperative with others Despite carrying sadness with him We have a famous example about that Yakub -pbuh- when he spent years away from Yusuf -pbuh- He cried until he lost his sight Can anyone dare, despite his sanctity, Let's exclude his sanctity
Speaker A
Can anyone dare to describe him as depressed? No, because his life still continued and he continued preaching He still raised his children, but he remained sad and longing for his son - We can't call him depressed - His sadness is justified
Speaker A
Yes, but if he reached a level in which his daily job And his thoughts towards Allah, himself and others around him When they begin to distort, then we should pause Sadness here turns into what we call despair Which the Prophet sought refuge from
Speaker A
The Prophet didn't seek refuge from sadness, but from despair Another example, What's the difference between sadness and despair?
Speaker A
Despair is the complete loss of hope Which is an introduction to depression An introduction to depression For example, we all feel fear But not everyone despairs Not everyone panics Fear is normal as it saves you, it forces you to prepare for the exam
Speaker A
It prevents you from jumping into the street - To be cautious - Exactly But when fear prevents nurturing and developing Then this fear isn't normal It turned into a type of despair and panic Which we call today as panic attacks
Speaker A
All the way to clinical anxiety Clinical anxiety So, do we intersect with the general psychology and its diagnoses and treatments?
Speaker A
Within some aspects, yes, we do intersect But we surely have origins for definitions And origins to achieve a healthy prospective that's different than theirs I'll give an example of a person that thinks himself to be the center of the universe
Speaker A
How a satellite is monitoring him, and his boss is... I ask such person to cure his distrust and to focus on himself As the Egyptians say "focus on your paper" That's it If the life of such person is functioning properly
Speaker A
Where he goes to work without a problem In psychiatry, he's fine, but for us, he has a problem He suffers from distrust and must be treated When do they pay attention to him on the other side?
Speaker A
They wait until he fails to continue his meetings Why? because someone is looking at me "And this one too" Until he has a breakdown and flips the table Only then they diagnose him with paranoia and begin treatment But he had a problem all along, he suffers from distrust
Speaker A
I also have a scientific paper that I could send its links to you About issues that must be read by whom are interested A paper by Dr. Nizar Al-Aani It's an old paper, more than 20 years ago In which he discusses the crisis of modern psychology
Speaker A
In diagnosis, origins and methodologies All while having five patents under his name in general psychology Meaning that he isn't a person from outside of the system Moreover, there's a well-known book too A book called "Saving normal" Notice the title, "Saving normal"
Speaker A
It discusses how modern psychology doesn't cure patients, rather it sickens the healthy - Some people agree with that - There are books about it If Allah wills, I might dedicate a full PDF file with references regarding this issue
Speaker A
- All are western too... - We'll add it to the description My point is that in this book "Saving normal" What does its author say?
Speaker A
He wrote a nice phrase in the introduction - He says "If I..." - This is it? Saving normal?
Speaker A
Yes, that's it This is the book title, "Saving normal" - What does he say in the introduction? - He mentions...
Speaker A
- The author isn't just... - An amateur No, it isn't a conspiracy theory either, He was once a director...
Speaker A
Responsible over the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Which they describe as the Bible of Psychiatry I know about it, I once read it - It led me to thinking that we are all ill - Yes - This is what it says - Yes
Speaker A
Amazing how quick the search is - It's instant - This is it The crisis of modern psychology in its theory, references, methodology and standards By Nizar Saied Al-Aani, may Allah bless him My point is, what did he say?
Speaker A
He said, if you ask yourself... Am I healthy or not? you must add another question too Which is a quick summary...
Speaker A
Have you ever visited a psychiatrist or not? Meaning that you'll remain healthy until you visit a psychiatrist You won't leave without having a problem Do you suffer from this? or that?
Speaker A
As the methodology that current psychology follows Is influenced by philosophies, as I'd mentioned As they seek to reach a type of the "superman" Which is what we call "the delusion of perfection" The holistic human - Who is holistic? - No one
Speaker A
So much that that is now a new western proposal That visiting psychiatrists should be the last resort And to accept your weakness Take some pain Don't rush to visit a doctor as you'll leave with more diagnoses that what you actually have
Speaker A
Of course, this last proposal is a bit extreme Because being in the middle is always the best "Neither excess nor deficiency" Don't ignore yourself to a dangerous point Nor also exaggerate as how it became a trend over here
Speaker A
"I'll visit a psychotherapist" Why? As when a woman once visited me She told me that she seeks to be cured from a phobia A phobia from what? "From cats" she said So, I asked her if she lives in a farm, she said no
Speaker A
Or if there was a cat shelter nearby? she said no How many cats do you encounter?
Speaker A
Then why do you seek to be cured from such phobia? Why? because it became a trend A trend that because I'm so important, I must have a life coach Or a psychotherapist It was much easier before, that's why I have a challenge
Speaker A
Or let's keep it for later after I'd replied What did he also say in the introduction other than being healthy He said "If I were to choose to become ill..." "In Baghdad at the eighth century" When the first psychology ward was established in Baghdad during the Abbasids era
Speaker A
This was eight centuries before the first psychology mental hospital in the west 800 years prior "If I were to choose to become mentally ill in Baghdad during that time" "Or in New York at the current time, I'd choose Baghdad"
Speaker A
- A big statement - Yes Why does it make us happy? Because it's rare to hear such confession from an opposing side Other than that, they don't even recognize us Even if you ask them about Al-Balkhi...
Speaker A
They won't know him I gathered more than 80 western books About the history of what's called psychology Out of all of them, only three mentioned Muslims One mentioned Al-Ghazali One mentioned Al-Balkhi, and Ibn Sina And that's it Where's our culture? especially if I show you the list of our publications
Speaker A
And after talking about Erin Francis Let's go back to the challenge which I have been proposing for more than 20 years And so far, no one was able to win it I challenge them to find a mental illness in modern definitions
Speaker A
During the first 140 years of the Islamic empire In the first 1.5 centuries I challenge them The huge difference between the jurisprudence of the self I repeat, by it, I don't mean my school I mean, any strive to understand the self in the manner of its Creator
Speaker A
Some call it Islamization, Islamic psychology, or the Islamic theory It's okay, even though I try to stray away from the name of Psychology As I'd said, I don't want to accept the good and the bad I find what I have to be sufficient
Speaker A
And it's okay if we intersect sometimes The big difference is that we believe in a Creator We seek the root causes and treatments We also use different terminologies like heart illnesses All of that still doesn't prevent a person from tribulation
Speaker A
But even with tribulations, there are tools that directly lead to solutions Not instantly as in magic but...
Speaker A
For example, one of the things I'm criticized for "What's the relation between faith and mental illness, Doctor?" "Do you know how many bearded people visit the clinics?" I respond that this is excellent What does that mean? that they're religious
Speaker A
So, can I disagree with you? "What do you mean?" What's faith? Is it to recite the five pillars of faith?
Speaker A
Is that it? Then, how will I understand a Hadith like "None of you truly believes until..." "Until he loves for his brother" Explain it to me, does it mean they are disbelievers?
Speaker A
God forbids But their faith won't be complete They won't reach a good level of faith...
Speaker A
And the rest of scriptures with the same meaning "He whose neighbor is not safe from his affliction" He might be Muslim and religious But he might have a problem that he always parks his car in front of his neighbor’s garage
Speaker A
This is not... And even moreover When the Prophet -pbuh- Advises a person not to get angry Does that mean he forbids him from a normal reaction that Allah had created which is anger?
Speaker A
Of course not, but he means... Don't lead yourself to reprehensible anger And I usually use this phrase Don't let others control your emotions Don't make it easy for others to anger you With a dislike or an unfollow Don't let that anger you
Speaker A
Why do we discuss anger now? Sometimes we need to revise our understanding of terminologies Let's return back to the clinic I can't count how many people that visit, Faisal And I hope I'm understood within the context here People with beards or wearing Niqab or a short Thoub
Speaker A
People who follow a certain sect What's beneath the shell? Massive love for Dunya (Life) Pathological attachment to children Problems regarding wealth and real-estate Where is their faith?
Speaker A
Where is their belief in fate and submission? Where is their satisfaction? One of the many examples I have...
Speaker A
Once, I got a call from a woman in Dubai After the greetings, she asked for me She asked to visit my clinic but there weren't available appointments While she must travel next week to London with her mother for her treatment
Speaker A
I asked her about the problem, so she said she suffers from aviophobia So, I said, what is requested of me, then?
Speaker A
She said "I want to travel" I told her that requires several sessions and can't be done over the phone And in order to find a solution for her I asked her "How is your relationship with Allah?" "What do you mean?" She replied
Speaker A
"It's not an accusation, I'm asking you about your relationship with Allah?" She said "I visit Quran centers" "I memorize four chapters" and so on Then I asked her again "What's your relationship with Allah?" Even my kids go to Quran centers
Speaker A
"You still didn't tell me, how's your relationship with Allah?" I insisted She continued "So much, but I didn't even want to say" "But I take care of some people..." But I insisted but she didn't understand So, I asked her "Are you prepared to meet Him?"
Speaker A
Then she exploded in crying "What will happen to my children if I die?" "My husband will remarry and bring them a stepmother" Then I asked her "Where have the four chapters of Quran gone?" "And all the visits to Quran centers?"
Speaker A
"Then, we suffer from loving life and hating death" Also, an extreme attachment So much that we aren't well prepared to meet Allah Does that mean it's normal?
Speaker A
Yes, as when Aysha told the Prophet in a true Hadith that "We'll all hate death" But He replied that "Who loved meeting Allah, Allah loves meeting him" Meaning that you aspire to meet Allah upon dying While it's normal in life to fear death
Speaker A
Why did I mention this example? which has a complement Ten days later, she called me from London I joked with her and asked her "Where are you now?" Because back then, the caller number shows zeroes In international calls, the caller number doesn't show
Speaker A
Just zeroes Then I asked her "Did you walk all the way there?" She said "No, I took the flight, it was tough" And I quote a very nice phrase she said She said it was hard at the beginning
Speaker A
"Then I remembered what you said, then..." "The higher the plane went" "I see the world getting smaller" "Then all the land disappears" "And when we went above the clouds" "I thought that everyone that I worry about have disappeared"
Speaker A
"And the only one remained above me is the one who I'm not ready to see" Which is what I said before So, I told her that her rights aren't reserved I'll quote this phrase, and indeed I did Back again, this woman that called me the first time
Speaker A
Is she a believer or not? - She is - Yes In the general sense of belief Is it the same belief as after the call?
Speaker A
No, belief isn't just one word That's why when people complain about it being harsh As people can't carry more burdens Because Dr. Abdulrahman talks about how believers should be like I don't claim anyone is a disbeliever, God forbids
Speaker A
But I mean, how... As if you tell an obese person that he has a problem with not exercising What does that mean? you don't exercise Do you mean that I am...? Yes, I do Should I lie?
Speaker A
You have a problem that you don't exercise You eat junk food and consume carps You're too lean Eventually, diagnosis isn't shaming It isn't shaming, but we are too sensitive Even some specialists tell me that I shouldn't add more burden to people
Speaker A
Let's assume I don't How about I tell them they just need to work on their belief?
Speaker A
Is it better? sugarcoating the matter? I just said that his faith needs more work I'd like to begin dismantling the topic of psychology But we have the important example of not reserved rights Thinking about it, people could be fans for some clubs
Speaker A
While others are fans of only the club’s identity By just getting used to the club until it became part of his identity But does that mean they are really fans for the club?
Speaker A
Let me tell you some practical examples during my current visit to Kuwait I was in a lecture and I told the attendees And I always feel like out of honesty towards the people That I shouldn't be too soft
Speaker A
As I always identify myself in my lectures as a doctor, not a coiffeur The doctor's job is to identify the problem Then, we mentioned the topic of faith and mental illnesses So, I told them "Let's be realistic" "Is it faith to break down if you fail to get a Coco Chanel purse?"
Speaker A
"Or if you couldn't get the Bentley car?" "Or if your food order arrived a bit cold?" "Is it faith?" For sure, it isn't And for sure, no one could claim that I have faith While I spread chaos in the house after seeing a woman in a holiday trip with her husband in Bangkok or elsewhere
Speaker A
Why don't I have the same? For sure, no one can claim this is faith Why did I mention this?
Speaker A
Because such people have weak spiritual muscles Unable to handle distress Or separation Not even that...
Speaker A
A broken phone screen... Are we fooling ourselves? Tell me that you have problems with some concepts of faith Then let's work on them As when a person goes to a nutritionist "You have a problem understanding Cholesterol and diet and else"
Speaker A
But people are too sensitive of judgment "Don't judge me" I don't judge, even if I do, but I tell that Let's just work together to reach where you should be at There's an importance concept that we might mention later, which is reassurance
Speaker A
We all memorize this Quran verse "Ta, Ha. We have not sent down to you the Qur'an that you be distressed" Which means why else would we send you down the Quran?
Speaker A
It is called the concept of the opposite It means that Allah sent down the Quran for the opposite of distress So, to be reassured or satisfied The question now is...
Speaker A
Whom does this verse address? The Prophet -peace be upon him- Some interrupt Ta, Ha as "O' man" or "O' Muhammed" Did the Prophet go through distress or not?
Speaker A
So, what do I mean by distress? Who answered to this question? The end of the same chapter "O Adam! verily, this is an enemy to thee and thy wife" Which is the devil "So let him not get you both out of the Garden, so that thou art landed in misery"
Speaker A
This will give you an error In the beginning He said "We have not sent down to you the Qur'an that you be distressed" Then at the end, He says "let him not get you both out of the Garden, so that thou art landed in misery"
Speaker A
How so? let's continue a bit afterwards "Indeed, it is [promised] for you not to be hungry therein or be unclothed." "And indeed, you will not be thirsty therein or be hot from the sun." Until He said "Descend from Paradise - all,"
Speaker A
"Being enemies to one another. And if there should come to you guidance from Me - then whoever follows My guidance will neither go astray [in the world] nor suffer" The solution of the problem As suffering is either spiritual or material
Speaker A
The material suffering is the descendance from heaven Since you feel thirst, hunger or heat, this is suffering Everyone shares it, all the rich and the poor You always say that in the jurisprudence of the self, humans are a soul and a body
Speaker A
Why did you have to break it down like this? Not in any other way?
Speaker A
We'd like to talk about the body and the soul Let's get to know their definitions and nature Nice, I thought you wanted to begin with dismantling the jurisprudence of the self itself As it has a known trinity But if you meant dismantling the human self
Speaker A
- This is what we are discussing - Dismantling the human self First of all, this isn't just me, I'm not a prophet Peace be upon them all I'm not a pioneer in discussing the human self All humans attempted to dismantle the human self
Speaker A
Why? as when I tell you that there's a problem here And when you attempt to find it You'll begin by thinking about what it is made of?
Speaker A
That's why we defined the jurisprudence of the self as a strive to understand the self in the manner of its Creator Usually when I explain this to young students in my school I tell them that it's like a phone
Speaker A
You use an android phone Can you attempt to install iOS system on it? Why? different products, I knew that when I dismantled it The hardware, software, chipsets and else...
Speaker A
The human self is the same thing I must know what this self is made of So that I know how to treat it I can't handle it without knowing its components That's why we have two questions that confuse many people
Speaker A
What is the self-made of? And how does the self form? What is it made of and how does it form?
Speaker A
It is made of a soul and a body How it forms is a different story Let's now return to the example of the phone What is the phone made of?
Speaker A
- From hardware and software - Yes How is it formed? Using aluminum, copper and other materials Undergoing industrial processes After it is sold, its owner could add applications to it And it recharges Furthermore, why is this phone more expensive than this one?
Speaker A
Even though the components are almost the same But this one is different, why? Because of a better memory Not just that, if you were to get it now...
Speaker A
The owner will edit the camera settings Notice that, despite having the same components But he developed it So, what are the components of the self?
Speaker A
How it forms? what processes does it go through? Until it becomes Faisal, Abdulrahman or Muniera or anyone else Those are different processes Despite that we all have a soul and a body But your own soul or body, which we call "nature"
Speaker A
Your nature is different than mine Different than the others Returning to your first question, what are the components of the self?
Speaker A
In short, our Quran and Prophetic scriptures Upon studying them You'll find that there was a body in which the soul was breathed That's it I'd like, for the first time, If you have a transparent glass - Is there one? - A transparent glass
Speaker A
If we removed the sticker... - Yes, please - Just remove the sticker I like to give this example In order to facilitate understanding the self And what is the relation between the body and the soul with the self?
Speaker A
When Allah mentions the soul, does He mean the self? In short... The word "body" refers to this material body which we know Which consists of skin, muscles, bones Proteins and chemistry, to the brain and the heart All of this is the body
Speaker A
But separately, what do we call that? Can we call it a self? - Imagine a lifeless body - We call it a corpse Yes, it is a corpse The word "body" Is this soulless object By adding the soul to the body
Speaker A
Then, it becomes a "being" A common mistake is saying "the body language" - Which is a common mistake - It should be the being language Because without life, there is no language So, there must be life In order to show emotions
Speaker A
Just add some powder to it... This empty body, the corpse Isn't called a self without its software Which is the soul Both formed a new component called the self So, the soul and body become the self Together, they're called the self
Speaker A
I wanted to... I wanted to ask you about the difference between the soul and the body but you answered it Nice nice nice Can I call something with a different name?
Speaker A
Yes, as in figurative language Meaning that, for example... Let's pause That's excellent Does it appear in the camera?
Speaker A
Can you see the black color? Excellent This is the first time... I carry out this experiment in a podcast Yes Okay, let's begin In the name of Allah - Should I continue? - Yes, please Now, we said there's a body and a soul
Speaker A
The body is the physical object from the realm of Shahada The physical object Which is what is the example of the phone?
Speaker A
- The hardware - Yes The soul is this spiritual unseen element That the body can't function without It is what makes him think Before that, it causes him to come to existence In the womb during development It gives him the instincts
Speaker A
And the ability to think and form thoughts This factor is called the soul The reason why I asked for this Let's imagine that the powder inside Represents the body While the water here represents the soul Before I do anything
Speaker A
- Can I call this powder a coffee drink? - No - Excellent, can I can this water as coffee? - No Okay now What do I have now?
Speaker A
Now I have a coffee drink This is the human self It consists of a body in addition to a soul A body and a soul Now, this new component Has water and coffee ground The human self is also made of a body and a soul
Speaker A
Some might find a linguistic issue over here "Wait a moment, doctor" When I say I, myself, thought Yes, you're referring to the element that did the thinking What thinks isn't the brain cell It's something within the cell, almost like electricity
Speaker A
When I say, I, myself, like... Yes, you refer to this soul element that likes and dislikes So, the self forms when the soul merges with the body?
Speaker A
Yes, the proof on that... That you can't find the word "self" in Quran In other than two meanings The first is a linguist one meaning the same Like "I read the same book" Or the exact one An example is when Eisa -pbuh- said:
Speaker A
"You know what is within myself, and I do not know what is within Yourself" We can't hear say it means a soul and a body Rather, he means that You, God, know what I have within me...
Speaker A
And I don't know what's within you It's another meaning, like in "has come unto you a Messenger from amongst yourselves" Which is an absolute linguistic meaning It means the being of the thing While the other meaning that matters to us refers to this being that thinks and feels
Speaker A
This meaning must include the soul and the body So, you can't find the word "self" in Quran or Sunnah Without meaning the merging of both elements Some say "my personality is different with my friends" "Than with my parents"
Speaker A
"Than with my wife or siblings" So, when they all gather during a social occasion I get confused on which personality should I use The formal personality to satisfy my parents And my friend will understand this But I mean that some claim that...
Speaker A
Your personality, along with a good amount of flexibility, Must also have unified concepts and values Whether in marketing during your job Or while raising your children Excuse me for I'll intervene a bit in your specialty You have something in media called...
Speaker A
Called the ID The branding, and how everything must follow the ID What's the ID? it's the identity No matter where you go, it's even called visual ID A visual ID, okay?
Speaker A
While in our society, we lost our identity We now have an identity for the career And one for marketing, and one for social life But I should be myself Meaning that this Abdulrahman sitting with you is the same one with his wife
Speaker A
And the same one in his isolation time with Allah But each require different social skills For sure, my privacy with my wife or daughters Is different than with you, but eventually, But I'm not a person that applies Allah's rules only with my wife
Speaker A
While I apply different concepts with you That's why, another factor that keeps the jurisprudence of the self solid against other theories In one of my slides, I say...
Speaker A
I'll still mention all the modern time psychology scholars And let's imagine they all excelled Despite how some haven't, but let's say so Still, the self is one no matter how different they are That's it, you could fill in the gaps
Speaker A
So, should I raise according to Frued’s psychoanalysis method? Or to Ericson's method? Or to Rogers or Alber Elise's methods?
Speaker A
That's why I think we turned into lab rats Now, the trend is to be calm Tomorrow it will be a psychological complex With root causes from the childhood and so on Then another opinion appears Who dictates this change?
Speaker A
Whom should I follow? - I can't just... - How about who went through a hard childhood?
Speaker A
- How they are... - By the way, I think... Didn't Dr. Emad discuss this matter in his episode?
Speaker A
Yes, he did Because he excels in this topic In short, what did I say before?
Speaker A
The new modern psychology has become fragile It's fragile and fears judgment Let me give you an example from our history The Prophet - peace be upon him - Found Al-Hasan eating from the charity dates Okay...
Speaker A
Is that a problem? Yes, the family of the Prophet don't eat from charity That's why the Prophet removes it from his mouth If this happened in the current time You won't believe that the Prophet had done it You will call it child abuse
Speaker A
Causing trauma to the kid Despite that, Al-Hasan grew to be the master of Jannah's youth And the leader of the year of Al-Gama'a I mean the real abuse like aggressively hitting the child Let me give you a general answer
Speaker A
Any pain within a reassured context - Won't cause a problem - We all agree on that Even it is real pain that hurts But while knowing his father loves him But, pain in an abnormal context Is a rough tribulation for the children
Speaker A
Notice how I said it is a tribulation, not that it'll surely cause complexes Meaning that they will be in a bigger need for social skills In order to overcome what happened to him But, in a book for Malcolm Gladwell
Speaker A
Called "David and Goliath" In which he says that children who grew up within challenges Tend more to find happiness in their future than others Why? because their immunity became stronger They became more resistant and skillful While the spoiled children that get all they want
Speaker A
Will find a lot of trouble in real life - So, there could be... - More challenged than others There could be a relation or not But, for sure, as a parent In essence, you must not be deviant You must be righteous
Speaker A
And if you had to discipline a child As the famous saying "no pain, no gain" But this pain must be within a reassured context That's why you must have heard about it Especially with the older generations They fondly remember how their fathers used to hit them
Speaker A
All while smiling Wait a moment, are you normal? Moreover, they might cry while remembering them Wait, do you cry for this parent?
Speaker A
Yes, because he loves me May Allah bless him Because it was within a reassured context But we do have bad examples now That reach up to psychotic behavior So, if a parent When you hear the stories of domestic abuse and psychological torture
Speaker A
You'll say they're deviant, and for sure, the children will face hard challenges Does that mean he'll for sure grow up to be ill? no On the contrary, do you know what?
Speaker A
Sometimes, the opposite happens as they refuse to become like their parents Exactly... That's why we usually say...
Speaker A
There are inputs, processes, outputs This is the question which I wanted to lead to You took the question from me; what does the self consist of?
Speaker A
It consists of three things Inputs, processes and outputs I began with the children question to lead to these factors You have three factors that make up the self Which you always mention, inputs, processes and outputs How can we understand the inputs to start with?
Speaker A
Let me just close off the topic of what consists the self It consists of a body and a soul - I hope everything is clear - It is We can take this away now Since we concluded the topic...
Speaker A
We could keep it here between us Okay... You don't want it? Muniera seems to think It doesn't go along with our ID No, it doesn't - Okay - God bless her Now, let's get into how the self is made up?
Speaker A
In order to give a comprehensive answer We give three answers to this question One of them is what you'd mentioned Which is an elaborate answer But I'll get to an objection to it We have three similar answers But some answers use Islamic terminologies
Speaker A
While others have modern terminologies as you'd mentioned Inputs, processes and outputs The first comprehensive answer is nature and nurture - Nature and nurture? - Yes - Which is nature and nurture - Yes The second is knowledge and work
Speaker A
The third is inputs, processes and outputs Let's elaborate the first, what do nature and nurture mean?
Speaker A
Allow me to use ourselves as an example Abdulrahman consists of nature and nurture You too as well The nature is either general or special The nurture is either compulsory or voluntary Let's elaborate each one Both of us have a general nature
Speaker A
We both feel hunger, thirst, love We love to be loved and praised We seek warmth We seek joy We are attracted to the opposite sex And so on, all of which are general natures So, could attraction to the same sex be a nature?
Speaker A
- No - It is not? It can't be a general nature We'll get to that later if we have the time Okay The special nature is what's now called as character types Among your brothers...
Speaker A
You have a special talent Since young age, you've been noticed to be quiet Or to be talkative Or committed to something This is the special nature Especially with twins Yes exactly What's strange is that we haven't yet found experimental evidence of a gene related to this
Speaker A
- Can you imagine that? - We still don't know We have religious evidence, but not a scientific experimental one What is scientific experimental evidence?
Speaker A
They still haven't found genes connected to particular characters But we have a Hadith by the Prophet talking to Ashaj Abdul-Qais "You possess two qualities that Allah loves. These are clemency and tolerance." So, he replied "Is it a nature that Allah had put in me?"
Speaker A
Meaning that is it pre-installed? Or did I acquire it? to which He replied "Allah had put in you" So, he said "Praise to Allah for giving me a nature that He loves" So, we have religious evidence That some traits could be given to you by Allah
Speaker A
Good, sometimes I pause here Let's assume, or before that, You won't be held accountable for anything will be mentioned here except for the fourth part You won't be held accountable for the first three things?
Speaker A
No So, we divided nature to general and special While nurture is what you acquire after the nature Do you remember the phone example?
Speaker A
What's the general nature in the phone example? The general nature in the phone? - That all phones... - Run out of battery, for example They all require a battery They need to be recharged While the special nature is like a bigger memory for certain phones
Speaker A
- Or special cameras? - Yes And nurture is either compulsory or voluntary In our example, the compulsory nurture is our parents We didn't choose them The time in which you were born, it's also a compulsory nurture If you walk in a street filled with advertisements
Speaker A
This is compulsory nurture Anything acquired by the self after the nature is called nurture This is regarding the compulsory nurture In the example of the phone, what's the compulsory nurture?
Speaker A
The pre-installed apps Yes, which you can't uninstall - Can you? - Of course, When I buy a new phone, the first thing I do is uninstall everything The apps which I can't uninstall, I force stop them Why uninstall them?
Speaker A
It occupies the memory and I don't need them - You don't use them? - No, if I showed you my phone now...
Speaker A
Just the clock, the phone icon and telegram - Just that - Yes You must download YouTube to watch us, doctor Not on my phone, maybe on the laptop But this is my only use for the phone Are you subscribed to us?
Speaker A
I don't recall Because, which will confuse you, - Even my channel - You don't control it?
Speaker A
It doesn't have comments or likes - Just the content - Yes In order to avoid occupying the self with the matters of followers and numbers For you, you must need to know the feedback - But for me... - Your aim is different
Speaker A
- This is the third part which is... - The compulsory nurture - Yes - Okay Which is now called nurture which comes from the environment and so on Which are the inputs also Now for the voluntary nurture In our example,
Speaker A
It is our choice on whom to befriend or what to wear It is a choice when you called and invited Abdulrahman And Abdulrahman's choice is to agree or refuse Also, choosing your religion after research is also voluntary nurture
Speaker A
Why are these four things important? First of all, they explain many things about the self Secondly, you don't get held accountable for the first three things Allah doesn't hold you accountable for the general nature which He'd given to you
Speaker A
Nor for the special nature Nor for the compulsory nurture Rather, for the voluntary nurture which is your work "And that there is not for man except that [good] for which he strives" "And that his effort is going to be seen"
Speaker A
This is your job which Allah had appointed for you in order to refine the other three - To refine them - Yes That's why, one might say that his nature is attraction towards the same sex Excellent, what about his voluntary nurture?
Speaker A
You insist on going to their cafes To wear their clothes and watch their channels I don't mean this, but a person who is by nature and not by choice...
Speaker A
- Is attracted to the same... - We are yet to have evidence of that Even the west tried to find a gene But failed, which is a long story At first, their slogan was "it isn't my choice" Until the NIH organization in America announced
Speaker A
That after many research, they didn't find a gene controlling this This was a shock; they wanted someone to them it isn't their fault So, they changed the slogan to "It's my choice" We want to be like that...
Speaker A
After all, you must want this When I tell you we don't have any genetic factor related to this Because there are many misconceptions During the first years of the child, they experience many things Which explain their actions when they grow up
Speaker A
Do you know how many months, weeks and days in four years? Years of exposure, while we think it is natural, how so?
Speaker A
The nurturing began since their birth Where does it come from, then? In my personal opinion...
Speaker A
Part of it is private nature which is to test them And compulsory nurturing from things like parents’ treatment Their relationship, the abuse The harassment, which is one of the reasons But people pay more attention to it than others
Speaker A
We don't have a proof that anyone gets harassed No, there are people who were harassed and still grew up to become healthy adults Who then become parents without problems Also, the issue of changes related to puberty The first puberty experience might be with one of the same sex
Speaker A
Which moved certain feelings for them Or a person with rejection as their first experience with the other sex Which led them to seek affection from the same sex There are many things that contribute Within the second and third factors
Speaker A
And also, the voluntary nurturing too - Which is? - I have a story that I always mention A person brought in by his mother in the American hospital in Beirut She told me that he was engaged with a healthy relationship, by which she means...
Speaker A
That his affairs still continued And he was engaged Suddenly, his fiancée told the mother That he has become strange and stopped approaching her And stop reacting to her When she confronted him, he said that he will stay like that
Speaker A
Since he's so and so Anyways... When I talked to him, I told him Your mothers says so and so, and he approved He said that he met with a person during a cultural exchange program This person took him to a gay club
Speaker A
That's it He got stuck He liked it, as a trend He tried then got stuck So, he stopped feeling the same for his fiancée And stayed so - This is the fourth factor? - Yes, voluntary nurture That's why most of our treatment now
Speaker A
In this matter are voluntary nurture treatments By changing their clothes style and the places which they go to Change your company and TV channels Which all discuss the same topic Showing them as heroes and as such Then let's see when the input changes
Speaker A
What happened to the process and outputs? So, the inputs are the first thing Whether in the topic of same sex attraction or...
Speaker A
In order to broaden the topic more What are the inputs that people could go through...
Speaker A
- That could affect them? - compulsory nurturing, in short, We begin measuring it at home Home, whom and what is in it Meaning the furniture Even the bathroom faucet The shampoo, the soap, everything All of these are inputs that affect me, so much...
Speaker A
That we have a disorder called "Barbie syndrome" Which is internationally recognized A researcher wrote about syndrome it called "The body image" In which she dedicates a whole chapter About the Barbie complex for American girls And how a whole generation in America
Speaker A
That Barbie had disfigured its feminine identity How girls should have certain body features - Which aren't normal - This greatly affected them?
Speaker A
Why did I mention this example? Because Barbie is just a doll at home Imagine, a doll at home But girls grew up with this doll - Representing the female - A stereotypical image of feminism?
Speaker A
For sure Therefore, the couch The closet, the wardrobe All are repeated inputs that create things within the self That later change into what we call as habits And the parents too Their characters, conversations, loud voices The screens that top the walls of every home
Speaker A
Which I call "the idol in every house" We look into what and who is in the house Then, outside on the street Which I call "the hidden factor" People complain about how their children say words that they don't use at home
Speaker A
Despite going to respectable schools But what about the street? With all its advertisements, chattering and language Sadly, many people ignore this And the markets, needless to say You must have witnessed this in your work too They say that in a cosmopolitan city
Speaker A
- Which is... - A city that's culturally diverse Yes, culturally diverse Or culturally crowded When you take a walk there You'll encounter around 700 to 1200 advertisements every day without being aware And they mention examples in cities like Singapore, Hongkong and Dubai
Speaker A
And New York also By walking, you'll encounter around 800 to 1200 advertisements without noticing And when you go buy a product You won't know why you'd bought it but it was repeatedly forced on you many times This is the basics of marketing products
Speaker A
This will lead us to the issue of value I mean, is this advertising tool...
Speaker A
Which is forced onto you, do we have a problem with the tool itself? Or with exposure to advertisements?
Speaker A
The tool stays a tool For a banner is just a board It could show bad content -Or good content - But you...
Speaker A
It will still influence you For sure, repeated exposure will defiantly influence you By the way, this brings us back to the voluntary nurturing - While the other type is compulsory nurturing - Which you aren't held accountable for?
Speaker A
Yes, like the issue of lowering the gaze Will you be held accountable for an ill-dressed woman on the street?
Speaker A
No, you'll be held accountable for your voluntary nurturing - For the voluntary nurture - Not the first gaze?
Speaker A
While not for the compulsory nurture But the problem is... That when the compulsory nurture is overly repeated Might have worse impacts more than you could imagine You might say that you avoid gazing But you still visit malls In which most people are ill-dressed causing repeated compulsory nurturing
Speaker A
A lot of repeated first gazes, by which you get used to it That's why I assume that one of the reasons why we no longer give advice or show guidance Is because we got too used to it Meaning that your eyes got used to it
Speaker A
So much that it no longer drives you to give advice and guidance At least, I must feel bad about it Why? because of a process called desensitization In which your threshold is lowered...
Speaker A
Or became higher, hard to stimulate Or hard to function and work It doesn't easily ignite And I should return back to the issue of inputs But in a quick manner...
Speaker A
The market, street, club or cafe are all hidden factors The cafe which you choose is filled with inputs Which is voluntary nurture by the way It's a voluntary nurture to compulsory inputs Then, the role of the educational institution
Speaker A
Needless to talk about the schools and academia The type of teachers and workers in them The cars in which the students arrive in and their drivers All are inputs that influence you They affect your subconscious?
Speaker A
- They affect your self - Okay Whether you call it brain or subconscious All are things within the self Your role is...
Speaker A
To do a very important practice which is called abstinence Your ability to abstain and be aware of what's happening Before this point...
Speaker A
This is the solution, right? We still want to continue discussing the processes - The inputs are now clear - Also, the religious institute too The mosque, the Khutba, the preachers and the media All factors of this - The same with music - So, anything that can be seen?
Speaker A
We define inputs as everything received by the self Everything received by the self Al-Ghazali says that senses are the portals of the self It's true, but we say...
Speaker A
They are two-way inputs They receive and send, so when I look at you now...
Speaker A
My eyes send you certain messages which is an output At the same time, it receives your outputs too Also, the job institution contributes The companies, real-estate, hospitals All these inputs are regarded as compulsory nurture While my job is voluntary nurture
Speaker A
Why? When I get dressed before the mirror Is my outfit considered an input, process or output?
Speaker A
- The outfit is an output - Yes, correct This output is the result of my processes Which is controlled by my preferences Which is also highly affected by the inputs Your job is to work on the processes and outputs
Speaker A
Because, which is strange to many people, That your outputs will become your inputs in the first place We still haven't explained the outputs or processes?
Speaker A
I know, because you used the word inputs So, your voluntary nurture Will turn to compulsory nurture for you first before anyone else How so? for example, every time you leave the house Or every time you enter, you put your...
Speaker A
Shoes in its place, nice? This is voluntary nurture That turned to compulsory nurture as your eyes witnessed the act By repeating it, you see it again So, your action with repetition will turn into a habit So, the habit is the repeated voluntary nurturing
Speaker A
Yes, which turns to compulsory nurturing for you first before others Then it will be transferred to your brother Or sister, or anyone else - This is the first theory - So, I can be a compulsory nurture to another person?
Speaker A
- Of course, - And I can influence others this way For sure, this is true In the jurisprudence of the self, we say We first define the human self as an existent being, then a created being Its existence means it has an influence
Speaker A
This is just a cup here It exists; does it have an influence? - It does - What is the influence?
Speaker A
- Its influence is that it... - Don't get into deep meaning Let's keep it simple It reduces thirst This is its content, imagine it is empty - The cup? - Yes What is its influence?
Speaker A
- I don't get it - Okay, I'll move my hand now - You could drop it... - Excellent So, its influence limited my movement It took space It reflected the light All while it is just a cup For us it is just a piece of paper
Speaker A
Needless to say, the influence of a human I got it now Imagine how severe it is when saying someone is worthless No one is worthless But, doctor, some people have weak personalities Yes, and their first influence is when you realized their weakness...
Speaker A
Which strengthened your personality So, you said you're stronger compared to them Or when you say someone’s, existence is worthless This is a false statement Their existence showed you the strength of others that's why they are weak No one is without an influence, and let me take an ethical jump...
Speaker A
If an ill-dressed woman walks down the street After advising her, she responds that it's her freedom I reply that this is excellent We won't talk about religion, rather about the existence and influence Does your existence have an influence? if she said no, she'd belittle herself
Speaker A
Right? when she says she has no influence And if she said yes, then let's see what this influence is There are light waves that reflected off of this body Which my eyes have received Stimulating my brain and testosterone and influenced me
Speaker A
"So, don't look" Excellent, then your existence affected the freedom of my sight So, what's the solution?
Speaker A
How about I keep looking? And I'll gaze too She'll sue me, but why? "Your gaze offended me" but it is just a Lightwave reflected on you The same thing, so why do you consider your influence...
Speaker A
Do you get it? I mean that the issue of existence and influence And you can imagine the influence of the objects around us And the people, which we call "the objects and beings" All have influences Nothing is without influence
Speaker A
And I have an example that usually touches the audience The seed which a mother just felt at the beginning of the pregnancy Is a being that we just got to know about its existence Suddenly, the period stops After some tests, she finds out she's pregnant
Speaker A
A being that might not even feel its own existence Causes the mother to cry Then begins celebrating Her life changes Changed her schedule The opposite might also happen in the form of pregnancy depression Caused by the fear of giving birth of changed body image
Speaker A
Moreover, I know about stories For fetuses that led their atheist parents to convert to Islam I know people, personally, Upon knowing about the pregnancy Their opinions about the universe, fatherhood, mercy And the divinity began changing Which is the influence of a being that you can't see yet
Speaker A
You still haven't seen it, needless to mention... So, sometimes they say... How some enthusiastic young people during the events act They write "I passed through here" But, guys, just your existence has an influence It is a matter of whether it's a good or a bad influence
Speaker A
From here emerges a word which we all know which is character Where is its root word?
Speaker A
It's the word "persona" Which means mask in Latin Encompass the role being portrayed, Which represents the actions of the person The persona is the role Any existing being has a personality What's important is what's its influence?
Speaker A
Like how some say "This person never made anyone upset" What does that mean? We just had the example of the cup It hinders the movement of my hand If it didn't, then it doesn't exist So, if you never made anyone upset
Speaker A
As in story about a righteous man walking in a funeral When he heard someone saying "May Allah has peace on him, he never bothered anyone" For which he replied "By this you belittled him" As if he had never bothered anyone, he didn't have a personality
Speaker A
Another example of asking someone about his relationship with his neighbors He said "It's fine", to which he replied "Then, you don't give advice nor guidance" Because if everyone is happy with you It means there's a problem Of course, it isn't an invitation for people to make problems
Speaker A
But it is the nature of things that as long as you exist Then you must have a level of conflict, at least So, this was the nature and nurture of the first gaze We divided it to general and special natures
Speaker A
There are two other words also used in the history Which also parallel to nature and nurture, work and knowledge Let's return back to our example But we forgot something, what's the voluntary nurture in phones?
Speaker A
The voluntary nurture in phones is when you install applications Everything you do, your applications And everything else, exactly That's why, the owners of some phones might struggle to install any applications Because of insufficient space available All the memory space is filled with trivial things
Speaker A
While other people have a lot of space in their phones In which you could download library or as such Now, the work and knowledge in our example I'm the result of work and knowledge The knowledge is everything within me such as thoughts, ideas or emotions
Speaker A
In Islam, those are called knowledge Meaning what? That just your awareness of being a human is knowledge Just your awareness of your separate identity is knowledge Your hunger is also called knowledge too That's why they call it "the knowledge of the heart"
Speaker A
Which consists of the concepts of good faith and reliance on Allah Those are the knowledge of the heart And the works of the heart too This is the knowledge, while for the work There are internal and external works
Speaker A
The internal work is the functions of heart as mentioned While the external work is what's sensible We are also made up of both How so? let's apply it The external knowledge is the behavior?
Speaker A
The external work is the behaviors Yes, the external behaviors Apply this to what I just said I Abdulrahman What's the knowledge that makes me up?
Speaker A
My pre-installed concepts, which is a nature What I learned from my parents, which is compulsory nurture What I voluntarily learned too There are works like my internal emotions and desires And external like my actions and decisions So, the work and knowledge summarize the nature and nurture too
Speaker A
While in modern language, this is called inputs, processes and outputs There's an objection here by a dear person which you'd hosted here before He has an objection regarding this He told me "When you say, inputs, processes and outputs"
Speaker A
"I fear that might agree with the behavioral school that treats humans as computers" To which I said "I don't mind that" I am not sensitive towards refusing everything said by non-believers It's okay, we might cross paths If it was correct, I don't mind it
Speaker A
As in the Quran "do not let the hatred of a people prevent you from being just. Be just; that is nearer to righteousness." If they say something correct, I don't mind using it But I don't use it just because they said it
Speaker A
Because it already exists I just said how the nature has inputs And the nurture has inputs too The self itself has processes And the self produces outputs too So, what's the problem?
Speaker A
I think he meant the compartmentalization Which is to put humans in a box Made of certain components - While the processes are intertwined - They are intertwined The inputs aren't separate The same with processes and outputs too Anyway, the inputs are everything received by the self
Speaker A
Therefore, the sensation of your clothes is an input What you're hearing now is an input Your vision of me is an input The feeling of the seat is also an input So, inputs are massive and uncountable So much that experts of education
Speaker A
Tried to measure the inputs They found that infants less than 2 years-old Receive more than one million inputs in less than an hour Okay...
Speaker A
I want to give you a practical example, let's use this If I asked you about what you're seeing in front of you now - Tell me - A cup Use as much details as you can - In more details? - Yes
Speaker A
A brand logo of two coffee beans On the cup The inside of it is white and brown on the outside - Just the cup itself? - Yes - It is circular - Okay For an infant that's one year old
Speaker A
Everything you just said isn't known to him Imagine that, he doesn't even know what cup means For him, this is an object That has many details So much that even this spot here Imagine that this arch is slightly different than the one next to it
Speaker A
For him, it is a different input That's why the kids are innovative Because things aren't defined for them Unlike us, we just call this whole thing a cup For them, it could be a hat That he could put over his head according to his different definition
Speaker A
Imagine if you took this child to a toy store How many inputs will he receive?
Speaker A
That's why no wonder when they say In less than an hour, they could receive more than a million inputs Those inputs are a long story We might spend 3 or 4 days in our courses just discussing the log of inputs
Speaker A
In around 600 slides Imagine what's in the commercial ads, movies, TV shows, music Or everything else Here there is a direct objection Wait a second You just scared me with compulsory nurture and as such What to do? that's excellent
Speaker A
We said that Allah doesn't hold you accountable for the compulsory nurture You aren't accountable for your environment But He will hold you accountable for your voluntary nurture Therefore, when you have too many applications When you have too much furniture
Speaker A
Then, you need to review yourself You might think it's voluntary action but you were actually influenced to do so These are the processes; I postponed that with the solution The second objection is which should I stop doing?
Speaker A
The inputs are uncountable Faisal, you must drive a car, are you a physicist? - No - Why?
Speaker A
How did you allow yourself to drive a car without being a physicist? Because physicists manufactured the car to be easy to drive In order I can easily drive it You used enough physics to drive the car - Just enough - You might know about the appropriate speed
Speaker A
The speed average, the mirrors reflections Just enough, you don't have to be an expert to drive a car Why do I say this?
Speaker A
I'm required to deal with the inputs That allow me to safely navigate my life I don't seek an illusion of perfection Analyzing everything around me You'll waste your life in doing so The same as in the book fair
Speaker A
You just need to buy what you need only What's the issue that keeps you currently busy?
Speaker A
Buy a book for this - Searching for everything doesn't end - Not just that They aren't even capable of doing so While in the eastern philosophies and the limits of the mind We must hold a bit here Not just that, even if your brain was capable of receiving all the information
Speaker A
As the brain has a bigger capacity that the Congress library But you don't have enough time in your life We just use 10% of our brains This is a myth That's why I recommend a book called "the most famous 50 myths in common psychology"
Speaker A
It's a translated book It was published in 2004 One myth is that we just use 10% of our brains Meaning that if you work hard enough, you'll be invincible As in the movie Lucy and as such Along the matter of the super human that will understand everything
Speaker A
Again, there are many inputs We must only interact with the good ones And I always tell others...
Speaker A
Who should buy more books in the book fair? I was talking to my young students Should that be me or you?
Speaker A
It should be me Because I must have knowledge about the different topics As a public figure and as such While in reality, I just need one or two books Sometimes I just buy two books from the book fair
Speaker A
- Just that - That's what I need But you know that feeling of fullness How I must fill my library as a person of a nation that praises reading While in fact, this is just what I need This was regarding the inputs
Speaker A
Now for the processes The processes are interaction with the inputs within the human self - The interactions with the inputs - Within the human self The first interaction is the sensation Receiving my image is a sensation Does it stop here? no
Speaker A
Then you begin to think, who is this? what's his name? The dismantling of the input, thinking about it Dismantling is thinking Because thinking is dismantling the sum to parts So, thinking is dismantling Does it stop here? no After dismantling, you regroup it again
Speaker A
To decide whether to say hi or not If he was a friend or not? Is it allowed or not?
Speaker A
Should I look or not? these are mental processes So, processes have three parts: sensation, thinking and deciding Sensation is receiving the input Thinking is dismantling the input Deciding is to gather, regroup and connect - Give me an example situation - An example
Speaker A
While driving, a person turned sharply towards me The sensation is when I felt him getting closer What will happen now? a reaction Either I will respond angrily or move away So far, only the sensation and thinking happened Then, I dismantle
Speaker A
Should I respond angrily to him or not? Or should I ignore him? This is the dismantling Because I might even after thinking decide to respond aggressively According to what I have in my storage Then, the decision comes "It isn't the time nor place"
Speaker A
"It is hot and we are tired" "This will waste my time" So, I decide to ignore him Or I'll sign to him to be more careful Or I'll smile and ask him to continue Or when I see an advertisement banner
Speaker A
Seeing it is the sensation of it If I had received it without processing and dismantling it It will influence me, how so?
Speaker A
I have a group of videos that I'll send to you in order to be put in the description To experiments of exposure without awareness - It influences them? - They went and bought the products As if they were programmed to do so
Speaker A
They think they weren't influenced The biggest example on this, which I tell others That discuss with me the issue of inputs and their influence I advise them to study marketing, just that Three quarters of marketing is...
Speaker A
All about the most exposure to their product There's a book called "Predictably unpredictable" It is a nice book, now...
Speaker A
I liked another incident that you mentioned in one of your lectures Which can be used as social example When you walk in the market and see someone "Should I say hi or not?" I'd like to use this example
Speaker A
Let me talk about this example I'm walking in a street or the mall I saw someone, immediately sensation happened That's why the sensation doesn't require training It happens as long as you're alive By the way, sensation is different than feeling
Speaker A
The feeling is the inner interaction of emotions While sensation is receiving the input It comes from "sensor" Yes sensing After seeing the person and receiving the input I could ignore it But after a bit, I might realize that I'd seen him
Speaker A
This means the sensation happened Okay? Then "should I say hi or not?" Once I realized, I began dismantling So, now we are in the thinking phase Should I say hi or not?
Speaker A
But I heard that he talked ill about me the other day And he didn't invite me to an event The other day, he blocked me from the group Or I will think about his good deeds with me Decision making is the output of all of this
Speaker A
So, even if he were mistaken The issue doesn't matter that much, and I'm encouraged to be good by my religion - This happens quickly? - In tenth parts of a second That's why whoever imagines that all this dismantling
Speaker A
All these processes happen daily An example about mothers when their children walk in "Come here, what are you hiding?" How did you notice that?
Speaker A
While in fact, he walked in, the sensation happened The dismantling happened, the decision was made Then she said "Come here, show me what you have" And she does find something Or not, but...
Speaker A
Another example that I usually use from our daily lives When you enter a mall There's loud music playing Or any music We might think that by ignoring it, we'll be fine, which is wrong The sensation happened Meaning, the input was received
Speaker A
When it wasn't dismantled, what happened? It entered and occupied your subconscious space It went wherever it wants The proof is...
Speaker A
After leaving the mall - What do you notice? - You hum the song - Yes - True Then you realize this Especially if you don't like the song You begin rejecting your action While if you stopped and abstained from listening
Speaker A
Which is an important skill to have Just by deciding to abstain and continuing It will be hard to hum the song after leaving the mall Because when the humming comes It will already be rejected by you When you decided to abstain
Speaker A
But if didn't decide to abstain It'll influence you And it will influence your instinctual impulses Let me give you an example Which I use to explain the concept of abstinence of gazing to the young people While walking, you encountered an ad showing a female character
Speaker A
When you ignore it What happens is that after you'd received the input It will begin influencing you But if your reaction was...
Speaker A
"This is an unrealistic standard of beauty" When the realization happens after a bit It will be within the position in which you had put it in How this is unrealistic and as such So, if a person fails to correctly dismantle inputs
Speaker A
They get influenced by them "Look how pretty!" "She's prettier than my wife" - It will influence you - So, you'd put it her in a position That's better than your wife?
Speaker A
Yes, while you shouldn't By this, the inputs and processes My job as a therapist is all about the inputs and processes Which means...
Speaker A
How do you see your father who once hit you? Who harassed you... Let's deal with this input And dismantle it But in a correct way As it could be wrongly dismantled As in the Quran "Indeed, he thought and deliberated."
Speaker A
"So may he be destroyed [for] how he deliberated." Despite thinking, that's why thinking alone isn't enough That's why I advise people That sensation doesn't require teaching as it happens naturally But the problem is when you don't dismantle it
Speaker A
Then, inputs will badly influence the self That's why you must organize your storage to avoid the havoc That's why people usually say "I've had enough" How does that happen?
Speaker A
Because of too many inputs Which they aren't mindful to Because they might be busy With all the applications and tasks But please, take ten minutes to organize and clear up your storage - Can you organize it by choice? - Yes
Speaker A
That's why what helps with organizing Is reducing the inputs Meaning, there's a phenomenon in America and other places too - Which is the garage sale - It is when people sell their excessive items And sell them during the weekend
Speaker A
This is widespread over there, why? Because they have a morbid consumer culture The number of items they have makes you wonder on how were they able to collect them?
Speaker A
That's why there's something called being a shopaholic Which is the addiction of shopping Okay...
Speaker A
Now, if you tell this person to clear everything up in ten minutes as we have to travel Could he do that? it's impossible But for a person that continuedly...
Speaker A
Let me give a practical example which is a problem if watched by the people of Kuwait I received many gifts during my visit Change the example...
Speaker A
It's okay, I'll mention it How many of them will I take back with me?
Speaker A
Very few And I'll regift the rest While I'm here, why? Because some things aren't needed for my wife and daughters I don't need them As the pointless excess Will negatively affect me So, I'll stay here for two weeks
Speaker A
Can you guess how many bags do I have, Faisal? - One? - A suitcase, you mean?
Speaker A
No, I have only one carry-on bag - Just that? - Yes What do you do?
Speaker A
- Exactly - I mean, you travel light - Which is minimalism? - Yes, they call it so But why? it is the same as minimalism?
Speaker A
The idea of taking only what's most important In our religion, there's something called asceticism Asceticism? the same concept?
Speaker A
Asceticism isn't exactly like minimalism As both are different But let's call it minimalism - To reduce? - Yes My carry-on bag has the clothes that I need Has my chargers and essentials, that's it - That's it - How does this impact you?
Speaker A
You can now ask me... To get you something, I'll easily do it as I know what I have It's hard to lose something Unless if Allah fated me to lose something Other than this, no...
Speaker A
That's why... I suffered a brain stroke 3.5 years ago - I didn't know, thank Allah for your well-being - Thanks I thought you knew this while researching - Because... - You mentioned this to me, right?
Speaker A
Yes, but I didn't think it was like this - Yes, yes - With the key Praise be to Allah, when this incident happened When it happened The man, engineer Suhaib, that Allah fated for him to knock on my door when I was alone at home
Speaker A
- When you began crawling on the floor - Yes I remember a comment by Suhaib which I mentioned to Hazem in his podcast He told me "Doctor, when I entered..." "The room was organized and your bag was prepared"
Speaker A
"Which we took to the hospital, how so?" To which I replied "I'm always prepared" I'm always prepared It puzzled him how he entered my room when I was half-paralyzed The room was organized, and the bag was prepared Which made him think that I just organized it
Speaker A
How will I have done it when I can't walk? It was already like this This prepared bag is my travel bag Except that I only add an extra object while traveling This is an example for when the storage is organized
Speaker A
Excuse my phrase... One of the things I like about your podcast Is how guests don't have anything with them This tests the organization of their storage When the guest has an organized storage They'll be prepared to answer any question with ease
Speaker A
That's why I'm sure you've noticed it, Faisal You feel more comfortable with some of your guests as they have organized thoughts They speak with ease While others, you try to remind them of the questions As they might stray away from the topic
Speaker A
The more organized the storage is The person will have an easier time Moreover, This also helped with social problems When a child speaks to his father without organizing his storage "I don't have time, go away" "It is not a good time"
Speaker A
The father is annoyed because of his crowded mind So, when the child attempts to find himself some space in this neglected storage He will fail to find space People ask me how I handle my clinic and visits and activities?
Speaker A
I tell them that everything is a separate file Once I finish with one file, I immediately shut it off For example, now...
Speaker A
Didn't I just mention that I'll send you some things? For me, I'm sure Muniera had notes about them The first thing I'll do is send them to you Because if I postpone it, I'll lose it And it is clever not to postpone
Speaker A
Not the other way around What do you think about the concept of the task list and as such?
Speaker A
I don't mind it if it helps But the problem is when we increase the applications that occupy space Attempting to reduce by adding Rather, you should continuously reduce the inputs I wanted to show you as a practical example
Speaker A
It doesn't have any applications Just the clock, the telephone and telegram - One phone? - Yes Moreover...
Speaker A
I don't like the idea of having more than one phone I don't accept it You're burdening yourself Which a problem that faces some figures Where they advise people with something While tricking themselves because they are different So, they don't follow their advice
Speaker A
Like how they advise people to use one phone While they have more than one because they're a celebrity or a public figure Okay, I'm too I'm an employee, a media figure And I can also excuse myself the same way
Speaker A
But there must be exceptions in order not to generalize There must be exceptions for people that really need more than one phone Especially the people that occupy certain positions They don't want their personal phone to be the same as...
Speaker A
How doctors use a certain phone with bigger battery - Or... - Those are exceptions But the essence is to...
Speaker A
- To reduce - As the more you reduce The easier you'll dismantle Let me give an example A person that his house is filled with furniture How long will take him to clean it?
Speaker A
How much will it cost him to maintain it? It should be less to avoid many troubles So that he can become more innovative and produce more Such people are in peace, they have time to answer calls What is the aim of reduction? to have more space?
Speaker A
Firstly, as too much inputs will cause havoc in the self Do I have enough time to deal with so much inputs?
Speaker A
For sure, no, so, the more you reduce the inputs The less havoc you'll have Some might say that it's all important, having children and other matters - How to reduce? - This is for how much?
Speaker A
You'll find the sum is small And the small have unimportant details How so? Like with the family, how many are they?
Speaker A
Do you visit them all every day? Or having to deal with schools, kids... - Work and other things... - Yes, how many are they?
Speaker A
- Let's be realistic - Let's dismantle it You wake up in the morning, okay?
Speaker A
What's so hard about praying Al-Fajer Then rested, or not, according to your schedule Then spent some time with the family Took the kids to school, or not, Especially how many don't even take their kids to school Who are we kidding?
Speaker A
But let's say... While driving them to school You can disturb yourself and the kids with screens Which is as bad as it can get You know, for myself, wife and daughters Mariam is almost 17.5 now Hajar is 14.5
Speaker A
Ask me, since their birth, How many times have we played anything in the car?
Speaker A
Maybe less than ten times - What do you do? - We interact - You talk? - And sing too We tell jokes and news We all just finished our day My wife is an ophthalmologist She will tell us about her day
Speaker A
I also do the same About a case in my work I teach them something that I learned today And the same with them Or a comment on something in the street You could talk with your wife while they're talking to each other in the back?
Speaker A
Naturally moreover... In our car's seat pockets... There are books so they can read in the car Especially with the traffic nowadays What's the difference between reading a book or using an iPad?
Speaker A
This will lead to a whole different topic I mean, you could pick her something to watch over the iPad or something to read - Is reading better? - One hundred percent This digital world that's filled with screens and emissions
Speaker A
Is a different topic, while it's okay if the content was useful But the best case is when you have social interactions in the car Also, to not use the radio Because many times, I ride with drivers Such as taxi drivers
Speaker A
Where they speak while the radio is playing To which I sometimes deliberately not answer Until they look at me As if they're trying to see if I was wearing a headphone to know why I don't answer I intentionally intend to intrigue them
Speaker A
Then I ask "Are you talking to me?" "Yes", but why is this on? Some axioms aren't self-evident for some people "Excuse me, why is this on?" "I thought you are interacting with it" Then I ask them to turn it off
Speaker A
It is either we talk or it does While it is now a trend as in the cafes You notice how they have a TV on And music is playing As if they want to prove to you that they have a sound system
Speaker A
And a TV screen And people are talking too Fooling themselves and others That this is in order to give people more privacy No, we can hear everything anyway The result is a state of noise Which is more evident in our countries, sadly
Speaker A
Which I have seen myself In the western countries, public spaces are quiet in nature While our nature is noise And even if you ask them to turn it off, they might refuse By doing this, you receive more inputs
Speaker A
Back to the taxi driver’s example One time, one asked me about marriage While playing songs that have very bad meanings With references about femininity, manhood or sex Or romance or love, all in bad meanings And after he had finished his questions
Speaker A
I asked him if I should reply to him or let the singer reply? Then he tried to turn it off but I asked him not to I asked him to hear it Returning to the concept of dismantlement "I want you to hear it"
Speaker A
"Please, keep it playing a bit more" The song was really bad with references to girls And different generalizations Then I said "You ask me about a problem with your wife" "While in your subconscious, your wife is in this file"
Speaker A
"Without your intention" Because this is what you play everyday Suddenly, you met a person that happened to be a psychotherapist But my words will be lost to what you hear everyday So, my first solution for you is to stop listening to this
Speaker A
And let your calm function on its own After clearing up Only then you could listen to us, or even better, you won't need us But if this is your daily input Such as in the movies and TV shows
Speaker A
The common lie which is the toxic relationship between the wife and the mother-in-law Where did it come from?
Speaker A
Did it come from our reality? no Certainly, movies and TV shows contributed to it We became familiar with somethings As if they were givens But if you ask them about the origin of them If you truly search They're the result of repeated media inputs
Speaker A
Especially from the media But I think it represents something good That there is a space for experiments and culture As it is important not to normalize a certain behavior Just because of some products like this That are the reason to stop
Speaker A
This could be more of a political issue than a cultural one - So... - I'll return back to it, as they all intersect Meaning that...
Speaker A
Do you know the program "Top Secret" on Al-Jazeera - Yes - The presenter had a strong Arabic language He once presented two episodes about masonry In which he said a strong statement Which I liked and began using, he said...
Speaker A
"Masons are allowed to pretend that they have nothing to do with religion or politics" "And we are allowed to believe that or not" Then turns to the camera and says "But please tell me..." "What in your daily life doesn't have anything to do with religion or politics?"
Speaker A
You can't... But I don't want to discuss the topic of art and its products But eventually, the repeated inputs Will influence you whether we like it or not What matters is what you keep yourself busy with Meaning, is it sensible for me to...
Speaker A
For every advertisement I see on the street, I don't the time, but if it mattered to me As happened the other day with my daughter Hajar She saw an advertisement She looked at it "Dad, do they think they will trick us?"
Speaker A
It was an ad about a bank card Showing a woman in uniform, full makeup and high heels With slogans like "Build your dream" To which she said "Do they think they will trick us with such images?" I told her "God bless you", just such pause
Speaker A
With objection will free her from the influence of it - Notice how - Even if you comment within yourself Yes But she said it loudly there I mean that you don't need to - Yes - Otherwise, people would walk around talking
Speaker A
For sure, yes By the way, regarding the issue of repeated inputs I once was visited by someone What is the newest Samsung phone?
Speaker A
- S24 or 26? - I don't know, I don't use Samsung Okay Anyway, this happened at the time of the S4 Because I don't know what model is there now He complained that his son is causing a problem to him
Speaker A
He keeps asking for a Galaxy S4 phone "I just want to know, how did he hear about it?" The kid was 10 years old We have a well-known street Which name I won't mention now It's well-known and has many restaurants
Speaker A
And many advertisements I asked him if his son passes through this street He said "Every day in his school bus" At that time, we carried out an experiment with the students in Makani center We counted the number of the Samsung Galaxy S4 advertisements at that time
Speaker A
Along the street, there were 92 clear ads 92 advertisement banners Just the big and apparent ones Not to mention the small ads in the stores or as such I told him that your son is being told 92 times every day "You're poor, everyone has the phone but you"
Speaker A
"Go ask from your father" So, he realized why he returns back home angry everyday He told me that he asked the bus driver Are there students that have such phones? but no No one is bus does Even nowadays
Speaker A
Social media might trigger some people, why? Despite their nice and sufficient lives Because of Instagram and comparing with others People compare without being aware, right?
Speaker A
Yes why? That's why they're called subliminal messages Or implicit messages Which are received without our awareness I don't anyone watching the episode will think...
Speaker A
That they compare their lives to others Maybe some do, but... Not everyone compares their lives to others - No one... - If we talk about...
Speaker A
That's why one solution is to abstain and stop Abstinence is very important The same as the announcement by Hajar before If we announce the problem, we will diagnose ourselves Amazing, let's now get to the outputs We discussed the inputs, processes...
Speaker A
The processes are sensation, thinking and decision making We aim to reach the decision making By the way...
Speaker A
We keep using your name here Yes, even something you... "How to make decisions?" - Yes - Nice Sensation, thinking and decision making Will eventually leads to an output Whether the output of the sensation or the thinking...
Speaker A
What are the outputs? After processing this input, it produced an output We call it, from our previous definitions, Either as knowledge Or as in current definitions: thought, emotion, behavior Meaning that if I saw you Once I did, I had an output, which is...
Speaker A
Recognizing the person to be Faisal Which is an idea or a thought This thought generates an emotion Either a neutral emotion Or love or hate Or fear, or distress, whatever Followed by a behavior The behavior is either I stay put
Speaker A
Or I say hi, or walk away And so on, and apply this to everything Like when I saw this cup The cup is a thought My feeling is neutral towards it Or a feeling of desire Or, I don't want
Speaker A
So, the emotion drives the behavior? Emotions are the drivers of behaviors They spark behaviors They are the firing of the behavior And the thought comes from the sensing?
Speaker A
Either from previous perceptions or an instinct Or a matter of the voluntary nurture That's why our work in the treatment Is not on the emotions - On the thoughts? - And behaviors How so?
Speaker A
Which is also where we intersect with the cognitive behavioral therapy Cognitive and behavioral We have thoughts, emotions, behaviors We don't work on the emotions Which is one of the stupid opinions Like in a famous western program When one of the crowds came up to him
Speaker A
And told him that she hates her husband To which he said "Love him!" While I'm watching and wondering She hates him, how can she love him?
Speaker A
What will feed this emotion? There must be an idea to feed it Our treatment is based on the thoughts and behaviors We don't discuss emotions, as we have something in our therapy called "Emotions shouldn't be wronged" You can't tell a person that their feelings are wrong
Speaker A
The emotions will remain But find the thoughts that generated such emotions For example, Let's take three examples Anything that might come to your mind, and Muniera can participate too Three examples Tell me anything, and I'll tell you how the thought and behavior work in it
Speaker A
And what is the role of emotions in it - Any example - Any behavioral example?
Speaker A
Any example in the universe Okay, a person... Decided to make a choose, regarding decision making He decided to choose this TV over this TV Nice The TV is an image or a thought Okay?
Speaker A
His choice is the behavior To decide to buy is the behavior Going to the store is a behavior I don't find a problem to which we should intervene But let's assume his wife complains about him buying an expensive TV
Speaker A
While he can't afford the school tuition I'm creating a problem because what you said isn't a problem Yes okay I could give another example, I mean, at least we understood the thought and the behavior Yes, but where's the emotion?
Speaker A
- How can a person make the decision? - Where's the emotion? In your example, where's the emotion?
Speaker A
- In what you said? - In your example In your example, what's his feeling?
Speaker A
We said that the thought is the TV And the behavior is his choice, but what's his emotion?
Speaker A
- In between both... - Which is? That he preferred this TV over the other Where did it come from?
Speaker A
Might be from his friends Or from a certain commercial But something must have fed the idea Leading the emotions toward a certain direction And far from another direction Thus, deciding to buy this TV Let me give a better example,
Speaker A
For a problem, right? A person decided to separate from his wife He decided to separate Excellent The decision is his behavior The decision is his behavior And by the way...
Speaker A
By uttering the words of his decision of separation This is the last stage, before this he was silent Which they call "emotional separation" He stopped sleeping in the same room with her All of these are behaviors He stopped replying to her messages
Speaker A
He gave her what she wants And gave her an open credit card But he doesn't smile to her All of which are behaviors, but back to the last behavior "We can't live together" This is a behavior The thought...
Speaker A
The wife might be boring Not righteous Or could have cheated Or a bad mother The emotion is not accepting her Not wanting her When this person comes to us, what do I advise him?
Speaker A
I ask him to stop for a moment He might visit us and allow his separation to continue The best decision might be separation So, let's talk about a different case Like smoking No one can claim smoking is good
Speaker A
Smokers have ideas associating smoking with freedom Or manhood, or friends Or with comfort As some say "smoke it away" So, there's a positive correlation with the idea - Related to an emotion - But crowded by...
Speaker A
"But the religious people say it is forbidden" This thought of objection within him "And it might cause cancer" But many people lived long lives while smoking?
Speaker A
And they didn't have cancer or elsewise So, the emotion is divided Most of it is in favor of smoking While a small part...
Speaker A
When he prays to Allah to help him quit it But the behavior here feeds the thought and the emotion What is the behavior? he feeds the negative idea by hanging out with his friends Or by going to smoking shops
Speaker A
On the other side... He began befriending non-smokers Which conflicts with smoking Which is what we call "to crowd the inputs" And began whole heartedly praying "O' Allah, get my heart to hate smoking" Okay?
Speaker A
And started asking his mother "If you see me doing it one day" "Threaten me to wish me ill" "Scare me" And told her wife not allow him to smoke in the house Even if the weather was extremely hot outside
Speaker A
Notice how he began acquiring a behavior In order to crowd the idea that will adjust his emotion But we can't directly treat the emotion That's why we always say that this is the collab between the thought and the behavior
Speaker A
With which we surround the emotion But we can't directly treat emotions - Do you get it? - Yes The emotion is when the person enjoys smoking But he doesn't have to enjoy it Where does this joy come from?
Speaker A
From a certain idea and a behavior, he's doing For example, when we tell this person to come Do you know that angels are hurt by it?
Speaker A
Do you pray or not? Moreover... The money you spend on it Moreover... How's your body?
Speaker A
When was the last time you climbed up the stairs? We feed him with thoughts And I always give two examples One for the Hijab (head cover) Is the Hijab a thought, an emotion or a behavior?
Speaker A
- A thought - Yes Another example One has a positive emotion towards the Hijab Meaning that...
Speaker A
All of which are thoughts Hijab is chastity for women Protection to her dignity A message to men to look at her as a soul not a body In addition to being obedience to Allah How will her behavior be like afterwards?
Speaker A
Her current emotion is positive Now, how will her behavior be like? - She'll wear Hijab? - Not necessarily Then what?
Speaker A
She won't be against Hijab Yes, I understand Which is a behavior She might befriend Hijabi women Until she finally wears it too Do you get it? right While on the other side, A woman with a negative idea about Hijab
Speaker A
What is her idea? That it represents the slavery of women And a sign of backwardness And as such So, her emotion is negative and her behavior is the opposite of the previous woman At first, she won't wear the Hijab
Speaker A
Reaching to opposing the Hijab Do you get it? nice Notice how both examples are fluent A fluent sequence of a thought, an emotion and a behavior Okay Another woman with positive emotion towards the Hijab But her behavior isn't positive, meaning she doesn't wear it
Speaker A
Will she be in harmony? - No, there's a contradiction - Of course, I call it a zig-zag A psychological zig-zag That's why you always find...
Speaker A
The most recent was a woman several days ago Complaining that she feels like Allah doesn't bless her efforts Why?
Speaker A
I asked her to tell the truth What's the problem? since it isn't possible that what she says...
Speaker A
When she makes efforts but in vain Despite that she seemed clever from her questions during the lecture She told me that she feels like the reason is because she doesn't wear a Hijab Do you notice the contradiction?
Speaker A
Her emotions towards the Hijab are positive But her behavior as she doesn't wear it Caused the contradiction Now, for the second one When the emotion is negative She wears a Hijab Like those forced by their families Or following the traditions
Speaker A
Will she be in harmony? No, she won't This type will remove it once she travels abroad Or she'll seek asylum and announce herself as the international feminist I mentioned an important word which is "the harmony" One might ask, does that mean that I...
Speaker A
If I was in harmony then I'm good? No, we are talking about the consistency of the process Not the character As when they have a bad idea...
Speaker A
He's in harmony with this idea But it doesn't mean that it is right And when is this tested?
Speaker A
When he goes through a crisis When in tribulation When facing existential crises Only then he will be tested As with the idea of divinity Some might feel negative towards it With the harmony of atheist behaviors Excellent Then what about death?
Speaker A
What about the evil in the universe? What about the afterlife which you must work for?
Speaker A
Then he will feel the trouble So, the harmony doesn't mean psychological well-being That's why we sadly sometimes see A woman...
Speaker A
That has a bad idea about Hijab Her emotions are bad And she doesn't wear one But she might say...
Speaker A
"I still haven't developed an idea" "I'm still thinking, some say it is mandatory" "While others say it is not" She is honest with herself This one might have better psychological well-being than one forced to wear it - One isn't convinced with it? - Exactly
Speaker A
I always mention another example For a person watching a smoking ad The smoking ad is an idea It might show a person smoking With a blonde girl while the smoke smoothly rises Making my idea about it a positive one
Speaker A
With positive emotions, but my behavior? I don't necessarily smoke But at least, I don't have a problem with smoking And I have a problem with the people that say it is forbidden And I go out with smokers And sometimes, I occasionally smoke
Speaker A
Until I turn into a smoker myself The opposite, a person watched the ad He immediately rejected the scene A negative thought led to negative emotions His behavior: He doesn't smoke And doesn't go out with smokers and as such
Speaker A
The same thing with the Hijab applies here There might be a person with negative emotions and thoughts But he was offered a cigarette and took it Not in harmony, you could even notice his inner conflict "I don't know, please ask them not to offer me cigarettes again"
Speaker A
"I didn't want to embarrass them" And the opposite, one with positive emotions and thoughts But he doesn't smoke, why?
Speaker A
His father watches over him He wants to smoke That's why he attempts to hide and smoke The more the person has harmony among this trinity The religion allows this trinity to be righteous and in harmony The religion It makes this trinity righteous and in harmony
Speaker A
There is no idea in the religion To which your emotions and behaviors Are in harmony, then you're a healthy person I don't know about an idea in the religion Starting from our concept of Allah And of yourself and the world
Speaker A
About the objects, plants and animals And about work About the loans and banks You will always find harmony among its idea, emotion and behavior Is it easy? no Are there people that are in complete harmony with the religion? no
Speaker A
There aren't, we are but weak creatures Some might excel in aspects but are weak in others Like how a person could be good at eating healthy But he's weak against the media Or a person strong at not having many applications
Speaker A
But weak against junk food Praise be to Allah, we remain to be creatures Each of us should purify himself in his own ways Now, doctor, we discussed the inputs, processes and outputs - Behaviors could depend on... - Thoughts, emotions, behaviors
Speaker A
So, even when attempting to treat We'd like to talk about the treatment Because there are people now How does the disease happen?
Speaker A
How could depression happen? Or anxiety? And how to treat it? I'd like to transit to this topic Nice okay Do you allow me to test you?
Speaker A
- It's okay - We gave introductions And you're the sample I have You tell me, about depression Where does it classify in terms of inputs, processes or outputs?
Speaker A
The word depression A thought led to an emotion and a behavior Which of them is depression?
Speaker A
An emotion accompanied by a behavior Can't it be a thought? Yes, depression could be caused from thoughts - Yes - Is depression an idea?
Speaker A
You succeeded in the test It is correct It is an emotion with a behavior Depression is an emotion with a behavior But it is connected to an idea That's why the word depression Is always accompanied by a certain stereotypical image
Speaker A
Depression means a certain song Even with the dark phone themes Which became a trend now So, sometimes it is a certain idea related to a feeling of being worthless Which is an emotion that turns into a behavior In which he doesn't eat, nor drink or go to work
Speaker A
And the same with anxiety too Therefore, everything we usually discuss about diseases Are rare to originate from an intellectual issue That's why we say in the treatment That most people that think it is intellectual For others, as we always return to the idea
Speaker A
But it is rare to receive a patient that wants to fix an idea Rather, they complain from being tired - Or depressed - Yes Or fear, they mention their feelings Our role is finding and fix the roots of these emotions
Speaker A
I also forgot to mention something previously Everything we said is mentioned in Iqraa It is all mentioned within the first part of the trinity of the jurisprudence of the self Iqraa means read Everything mentioned is within Iqraa Iqraa means to connect
Speaker A
To gather, or to think Which is "how to think" Now to the question of how to treat?
Speaker A
In fact, how to treat... Is also another part that sets the jurisprudence of the self apart from others Why? because we add another thing before the treatment Which is prevention Everything we mentioned is prevention Prevention is be mindful of your inputs
Speaker A
Prevention by crowding the inputs Prevention by continuedly clearing your mind By teaching your children how to...
Speaker A
For example, when a child says he was insulted by another kid I ask him "what do you mean by insulted you?" "What is an insult?" "Who told you this was an insult?" "The insult is when you yourself do this and that"
Speaker A
"While he can say whatever he wants" Then tell him the story when a person came to the Prophet and spoke "O Mohammed, my praise is good, and my insults are bad" To which He responded "May Allah guide you"
Speaker A
With that, you prevent the child using concepts that originate from the religion That the insult is different than what you think it is The insult is to do this and that...
Speaker A
Automatically, when the kid faces the same situation again So, imagine if his parents were the same And his teachers too, and the media After a while, he will be immune to psychological fragility He will be immune It will take a mountain to shake him
Speaker A
Because he doesn't feel weak Or worthless or otherwise That's why prevention comes first Prevention is to deal with the inputs As we define education from the point of view of the jurisprudence of the self It is repeated inputs
Speaker A
I do this and this, for my kids I do this and that, for them What you do is repeated inputs There's an important issue regarding the repeated inputs Despite that I didn't want to get too deeply into the educational topic
Speaker A
There's a key word in education that many people sadly don't pay attention to In the absence of this keyword, all inputs sent by you to your children Might not give the desired results And could even backfire, the keyword is reassurance
Speaker A
What does it mean? Remember how we mentioned that pain in a reassured environment is healthy?
Speaker A
No matter what you do to your child As long as he feels that his parents aren't stable Or his environment is It will be hard for him to accept them Or to learn from them That's why we seek prevention first
Speaker A
As prevention requires you to work on yourself Which is related to ones understanding of himself Me before others This problem causes a lot of problems "Doctor, do you call for selfishness?" I say yes But what kind of selfishness?
Speaker A
Selfishness in the jurisprudence of the self Is "Whosoever does righteous good deed, it is for himself" "And whosoever does evil, it is against himself." "So, whoever will see does so for his soul, and whoever is blind against it."
Speaker A
"If you do good, you do good for yourselves" "And if you do evil, [you do it] to yourselves." Moreover...
Speaker A
"Then perhaps you would kill yourself through grief over them, if they do not believe in this message," I once said this to a person in Dubai That was sitting in the crowd "Doctor, do you mean religion teaches us to be selfish?"
Speaker A
Yes, but what kind of selfishness? As for him, returning to the thought, His thought about selfishness is benefiting on the count of others But no, the religion urges us to light up for yourself and you will light up for others.
Speaker A
Not to burn yourself to light up for others Which is a false statement Rather, I give myself what it deserves As in last night, after finishing a long day A group of young people invited me for dinner but I rejected
Speaker A
They insisted by I refused Why? Because I need the sleep In order to be awake So that I can do this, right?
Speaker A
So, not giving myself what it deserves Will later affect what I can offer to others The most who fall into this trap are mothers "I live for my man and children" but it's wrong Live for yourself Allah will hold you accountable in the day of judgment
Speaker A
Your child will ask you for a good deed and you will refuse "The day on which a man shall fly from his brother, And his mother and his father" Islam teaches you to give yourself then others Because who lacks something can't provide it
Speaker A
The empty cup will give you nothing So, prevention by being mindful to repeated inputs The furniture, the house, holding the phone in front of the child The malls which we visit The other day, a brother...
Speaker A
I don't want to mention his name not to cause problems He wanted to honor me so he invited me to a certain mall To which I said "I hope you hadn't done that" On the side, I told him “If you ask me or my wife and daughters..."
Speaker A
When was the last time we went to the mall? I don't remember I can't recall "But how do you live?" which is another common misconception How do you live in this perfect world?
Speaker A
We live normally and eat junk food But not as much, why? Because I think malls are of the worst place that provide inputs One of the worst, why?
Speaker A
If we wanted to give an epistemological name to malls Or a cognitive, political or cultural name The mall is the ambassador of the culture of globalization So, if people are afraid of the American embassies Then what about the malls?
Speaker A
Malls call for everyone to come "I'll provide you with the whole American culture under one roof" Whether the foods, the brands Even the openness of people Tables next to each other breaking all barriers of privacy All of which happen in malls
Speaker A
A child walking inside with his family Will see inputs from the clothes, the brands, the happiness The iPad, and others After all this, you tell him that it is wrong Like the poem that says "Sees me drowning in the sea, but asks me not to get wet"
Speaker A
- But he's in the water? - Yes And his desires will request these objects How can he understand it when you reject him?
Speaker A
Or if it is educationally wrong This is hard, by the way, on the side In a lecture yesterday, one of the sisters showed her surprise And told me when I left "Doctor, do you really..." "Don't give phones to your daughters?"
Speaker A
To which I said "should I call their mother to confirm it?" I told you how for my daughters One is in secondary schools, and the other is three years younger They don't have phones - In secondary school without a phone? - No
Speaker A
For us, it isn't about... We have tens of families In our community With children about to enter college and don't have phones How do you live then?
Speaker A
You'll be surprised on how well they live With awareness of what happens in the world And might follow some youtubers too And might be familiar with the Instagram trends While not having a phone, as there are many instruments
Speaker A
As a family that I know, who dedicate a tablet device With a unified account for the whole family They use it to access whatever they want Moreover, within the same society I have people that achieved the second place on the world in a robotics competition
Speaker A
Despite not owning a phone himself The problem in short... You must have heard about the frogs in boiled water experiment?
Speaker A
No, I haven't It is called "boiled frogs" The experiment was changed from its original context A person in the 19th century conducted an experiment In which he used frogs with a brain disorder Which don't respond fast enough to triggers or stimulants
Speaker A
In short, if you throw frogs in boiled water... They'll jump away But if you put these frogs The frogs in the experiment which are different than normal frogs For which he used special frogs Put them in warm water
Speaker A
Then gradually increase the temperature of the water, and they will die in the water - Why? - They got familiar with it A few days ago, I wanted to publish a post But I feared that it will be misunderstood
Speaker A
I titled it "human frogs" Because of the context it refers to But I wonder if we have turned to human frogs in that sense?
Speaker A
That we got familiar to what's gradually drowning us? As you might find some say...
Speaker A
"What to do? the kids must..." Who said so? who said it is a must?
Speaker A
Why is it a must? excuse my phrasing Let me connect several points we mentioned in one example I'm now in the hotel After a few days A manager met with me He asked if everything was fine "Do you need anything?"
Speaker A
But why? Because since my first day until now I kept my "don't disturb" sign on the door So, since the first day until now, they haven't cleaned the room As I don't need it What does that have to do what we said today?
Speaker A
I consider that to be an aspect of faith I don't need the environment activists...
Speaker A
Or Be Green or others My religion tells me that as long as I don't need something Why do I have to feed the desire to have fresh towels every day?
Speaker A
While we have the amazing sun of Kuwait Excuse me, but once I finish showering I open the curtains and allow the sun in I hang the towel in the sun It gets boiled when I return Do I desire it? yes, it is a desire
Speaker A
I have the desire to have attention Because it is a hotel that was paid for But my faith prevents me from so This is an aspect of faith that prevents mental illnesses I don't feel like I wasn't valued enough
Speaker A
I didn't come to find new clean pillows Then what? Imagine how people feel belittled Because the faucet wasn't shiny when they got it All of these are illnesses Needless to mention obsession and other diseases That might emerge from such behaviors
Speaker A
Let's return back again We got familiarized We familiarized our graces too much That we no longer praise and thank Allah for them Like how kids nowadays in education We notice how they don't value their graces Why don't they?
Speaker A
If you ask their parents about why is that I always repeat two phrases And I ask others to memorize them The first is "Your busyness with what you lack" "Will deny you what you have" Your busyness with what you lacks will deny you what you have
Speaker A
- Which means... - When you think about what you don't have - You'll deny what you have - Yes I don't have this and that, making what you have worthless The other phrase is similar "Being busy with pleasures makes you forget the blessings"
Speaker A
Only busy with what's luxury By which you'll forget the blessing of having a roof, water, electricity You'll forget about all of that My point is that prevention is the main target Prevention by paying attention to the inputs Can I turn them off? I can't
Speaker A
This is not realistic And I don't like the word perfection, by the way It is a tricky word When you say perfect, it means hard to apply But no, it means an example to follow What's imaginary is what can't be applied
Speaker A
Like how people ask me "Do you really not have a TV at home?" Not just me, but many others don't too "But this is too perfect?" I say yes, it is, because I did it But if you say imaginary, then it is unapplicable
Speaker A
So, I don't say turn off the inputs We can't do that, but we can reduce them How so? in our daily lives In our furniture, our clothes The closets filled with more clothes than we need The phone applications, to reduce the inputs
Speaker A
And we keep only what we want Which is... Processes must have references Not what my cousin said or the group chat I have scriptures from Allah and the Prophet Which are our references "And if you disagree over anything, refer it to Allah and the Messenger,"
Speaker A
I have an assumption that's sad to have to seek in this world But I challenge you to find anything unanswered in religion Whether in politics, economy, art, media, interior design, or even using the bathroom Regarding this, I once met with a Japanese person
Speaker A
A convert in Dubai He used to work in the Japanese military I usually like to ask converts...
Speaker A
Not about their story of conversion as they must tell it a lot Rather, what's the moment in which you decided to convert?
Speaker A
He replied that it was more than one moment The first is when I knew how in the same way your religion teaches you how to use the bathroom It also teaches you how to handle your foreign affairs with the neighboring nations
Speaker A
I was amazed Indeed, such comprehensiveness He said that this can't be from a human And the second moment is when I saw how worshipers’ line up to pray in the Holy Mosque Yes, praise be to Allah He told that in his military school
Speaker A
It requires time to train people to line up quickly While I watch people that don't know each other from all over the world Once they hear the Iqama, they immediately stand in line I told him thank God you didn't know what happens after the prayer
Speaker A
Total chaos But this was what moved him Because the religion in this sense is comprehensive So, reduce the inputs Keep your reference clear And act as your reference tells you You'll find that your nature and nurture are fine
Speaker A
The same with your knowledge and work And also with your inputs, processes and outputs One question remains Does that guarantee me heaven on earth?
Speaker A
- No, as the life isn't heaven - What are you looking for? Excellent, this might require another episode We seek peace of mind and reassurance A common mistake to delude people that you'll take them to happiness The word happiness is a dangerous one
Speaker A
I seek not to be anxious I seek not to be troubled Why? because when I seek happiness I don't know if I'll ever reach it And I might take the wrong path In addition to how happiness has different definitions
Speaker A
Your happiness is different than mine And both could even contradict each other We could even fight each other Because you seek a happiness that's different than mine - So, I seek... - My happiness could be at the cost of yours?
Speaker A
This is very common, and you see that every where The happiness of many kids might come at the cost of their parents' happiness And the opposite applies too sometimes Which is another whole topic Because some ask about what does the jurisprudence of the self offer?
Speaker A
I tell them based on Iqraa We offer you a correct way of thinking It offers you a mind As you're set apart from other animals by having a mind The jurisprudence of the self offers you the mechanism of the mind
Speaker A
And it's good to end with this issue Which I'll return back to, Secondly, it offers you tranquility Without the mind, you can't find tranquility Without mind, there is no tranquility We can conclude with this point We spoke about how to reduce the inputs
Speaker A
And how to work on your processes What is the reference for thinking? in order not to fall into the traps of the mind Your reference is the revelation as in "Read in the name of your Lord" That's why the program is called Iqraa
Speaker A
So, here, in order to clarify this important point The processes' reference is religion - Certainly - Using which you know what to decide?
Speaker A
- Exactly - What's good or not In all matters of life "Say: Truly, my prayer and my service of sacrifice, my life and my death, are (all) for Allah, the Cherisher of the Worlds" That's why we don't believe in secularism
Speaker A
Not in a political way Even in psychology, secularism doesn't work remember how we mentioned the harmony before Harmony doesn't occur with secularism As secularism turns people as you said before...
Speaker A
To compartments But I'm not a compartment That's why we say a phrase in the course That we are of different mixtures Where does this come from?
Speaker A
"Verily, we have created man from Nutfah Amshaj, in order to try him" In our nature, anything in our life will influence another thing Therefore, we can't separate Allah from our life Because even my meeting here with you Might influence my call with my wife in a bit
Speaker A
Or influence my choice of what I'll do tonight And so, on That's why the reference should be the revelations Which we assume that gave answers to everything With harmony, it'll enable you to raise your children How to choose a wife, and the matters of life
Speaker A
Your career, what's Halal and not, loans and banks Your job, the furniture and everything else the revelation provided answers to all of this Making you a holistic human - A comprehensive human - Yes In return, notice who claim that the holistic approach exists in the eastern cultures
Speaker A
I ask them to bring one eastern culture That can provide even 1/10 of what Islam does Hinduism claims to be spiritual While Buddhism doesn't believe in a God Just yoga and the rest are on you Taoism is also limited to some concepts
Speaker A
Without regarding for everything else The things now called "personal life affairs" They don't guide them Help yourself with them While Islam provides you with all of this Which brings us to the last word Amazing how the whole episode was within the context of Iqraa
Speaker A
Despite how it included some aspects from the Self early on Why did we choose Iqraa?
Speaker A
The word Iqraa has a very nice lingual meaning What does Qara'a (Read) mean? Most people think it is the act of moving the eyes on the lines No, it's linguistic meaning is in fact...
Speaker A
To gather, or to collect Like to mind To mind is to gather or to correct So, it is as if "read" is similar to "mind" - Is it clear? - Some might say "he read the attack" Yes true
Speaker A
Or "read the personality" What does that mean? It means, the way he sits and talks and acts, all together Is called "reading" While what do we call each of them separately?
Speaker A
Do you remember "Open sesame"? When he tries to read the sign, he says "O- o- p-..." This is called pronunciation, not reading Pronunciation is to pronounce each letter separately While reading is gathering and uttering them together So, what's reading?
Speaker A
It is a process of gathering, collecting and organizing Prior to speaking or deciding When I want to choose a specialty I asked around and went every where I checked the market too After gathering all of this, I make the decision This is how reading and minding work
Speaker A
There are two matters regarding them Which are important to understand The word "mind" in Quran was never mentioned as an object A physical object No, but as a process That's why it's a common mistake To say that the human self is made of a body and a mind
Speaker A
It's wrong, just as if you said... To answer for the meaning of swimming as shorts And water, but swimming is the process of floating and moving in water Mind in Quran means to understand or to grasp Always as a process
Speaker A
Another mistake is when they point to head as the place of the mind What's inside is called the brain Not the mind, the brain is an organ While the mind is a process It is as if you said...
Speaker A
While pointing at the phone and saying "Call" No, this is a phone A call is the process that happened We mentioned how the self is made of a body and a soul Where's the mind here? it is a process by the self when both gather
Speaker A
When the soul really works That's why they say "what did you benefit from the phone?" Wait, is the software and hardware there?
Speaker A
Despite that, some don't benefit from it Because the software wasn't properly activated While another person is different I know people, as you must know too, Their phones are a media center With a lot many different applications All of his work is on the phone
Speaker A
You have a doctor here in Kuwait, may Allah bless him, When he sends me photos from his travels They take them with his phone Which amazes me I thought he used professional cameras So, despite having the same hardware and software
Speaker A
But the management style is different That's why I say We should avoid this mistake when speaking As in a question that I always put in my Iqraa exam I say "In Quran, how can there be a sane person who doesn't have a mind?
Speaker A
- Sane without a mind? - Yes - How? - Sane as Allah had given him gift of mind But he didn't use it as he should have That's why you always find in the Quran "will you not use reason?"
Speaker A
Or "Might you use reason" Furthermore... Quran never mentioned the mind in a negative way Whenever it describes a person as "not mindful" It means that he's a bad person Even if he was a professor by our definition But he doesn't "mind"
Speaker A
In which meaning? Not the ability to calculate But meaning that he didn't use the correct logic Which aids him to survive in the afterlife A simple example, A common mistake, how I just mentioned my skepticism towards the word "logical"
Speaker A
True When you search for the word "mind" in the Quran By the way, I wished if you'd discussed this with Prof. Naif I felt that you were so close to it, but you never discussed it When you search for the word "mind" in the Quran
Speaker A
The first sentence with the root word of "mind" in the Quran Will surprise you on how it doesn't have anything to do with the mathematical mind No, what is this verse?
Speaker A
"Do you order righteousness of the people and forget yourselves" "While you recite the Scripture? Then will you not reason?" Wait a minute here I thought that thinking will come in context of pondering or meditation Like how "Say: "Travel in the land and see how (Allah) originated creation"
Speaker A
Like how we always imagined it But the first word mentioned the mind Was that it isn't not mindful to keep busy with others on your self’s behalf It isn't mindful to order others and ignore yourself The speech was addressed to the people of Israel
Speaker A
And to everyone So, the mind isn't just a mental process Not a mathematical process Rather, it's a spiritual process Call it as you like That's why, where's the mind in Quran?
Speaker A
- Where? - In the heart, not the brain How did you know that? "Do they not then earnestly seek to understand the Qur'an, or are their hearts locked up by them?" Not their brains Also...
Speaker A
"Have they not journeyed through the earth, and had hearts to reason with" Hearts to reason with, notice how Which is an amazing secret that I think humans will never achieve Which is how can the heart reason?
Speaker A
That's why there are many researches now on how the heart isn't just a blood pump Not just a blood pump No, it seems to have another property That exceeds more than just pumping blood What is it? we don't know but we submit
Speaker A
Does that mean the brain isn't important? No, it is a massive server But is it what makes the human a mindful person as Allah had intended? No, it isn't The proof on that is how many people might have parts of their brains damaged
Speaker A
Yet, their reasoning mechanism that leads them to Allah still remains Ask anyone you know in the department of neurology You hear about people with brain strokes or even atrophic accidents Despite that, they can still have special things Like how they begin praying when they hear the call for prayer
Speaker A
Some of them might have forgotten their wives and kids, but not praying By the way, I don't mean in relation to Islam Even in other spiritual practices In other religions Which means that this reasoning process isn’t just in the brain
Speaker A
It isn't about just information That's why I said in the beginning "How is it that you enjoin others to follow the Right Way," The issue isn't just about the information No, it's about behaviors and faithfulness and patience And honesty
Speaker A
That's why we dismantle reasoning to three elements The first is to understand your trick to avoid them As reasoning doesn't work with tricks - No reasoning with tricks? - At all It is impossible A person that refuses to believe they need help
Speaker A
They won't reason A person that refuses to ask They won't reason A person only finds mistakes in others They don't like others...
Speaker A
Stay away from such people By the way, we advise not to waste time with arrogant people Even the people who debate - Who debate for the sake of it - Of course, Don't waste time with them That's the first factor
Speaker A
Secondly, is the important skill which I mentioned Its acronym is AQP, the A for Abstinence Q for Quitting and P for Patience Abstinence, Quitting and Patience, AQP People say they get confused with the difference between them I urge them to add prepositions to them
Speaker A
To abstain from To quit of, and patience to What does it mean? The phone I abstain from the phone Why did I abstain?
Speaker A
Why did I stop? And be patient with it Because I could abstain from it But fail to quit Which happens a lot, as when some attend a class And like the content of it Then why not apply it?
Speaker A
Because they failed to quit Abstain from, quit of, and patience on This is the skill which we need throughout our lives In order to secure ourselves To see others, and to learn Even while keeping notes from a lecture
Speaker A
Abstinence, quitting and patience While a lecture... I'm sorry... When I attempt to quit gazing for example But a woman passes through I saw it, then I should abstain from...
Speaker A
Abstain from looking, at first Abstain from looking Then stopping to understand why you didn't look In order to gain good deeds and strengthening the faith And patience on it Because you might decide to look a bit later - Yes - So, you must persist
Speaker A
You abstained from a certain YouTube channel Or a certain media content Why? Because of its pros and cons And being patient on it Now, while reading Quran, I liked a certain verse I stopped with this verse That's nice, it's abstinence
Speaker A
What did you abstain from here? You can't abstain from Quran Abstinence from distractions Like a sound That's why notice what you do As with the people of the myth of multitasking - They say it's possible - The myth...
Speaker A
- It's a myth indeed - I mean... We don't have enough time but I'd like to discuss this idea You have many interesting ideas, doctor But this is well-known and famous Can't people do several things at once?
Speaker A
Different distractions waste your energy - Isn't it an art of management? - Not at all No, no, no, there's a difference between habitual actions And multitasking A big difference, like how I'm talk with you now Is it a task to wear the headphone?
Speaker A
- No - It isn't Is it a task to drink water while talking? No, they're habits They have their own dedicated cells That's why when you pray without attention You might finish Al-Fatihah without noticing Was it a task?
Speaker A
No, tasks are new operations that require their own energy That's why it is a common mistake To say that responding to notifications isn’t a task While there's an American study about high school students They waste up to four hours a day with distractions during the class
Speaker A
They might think they are little So, abstinence from distractions? - Abstinence from distractions - Like the phone while reading Quran I must put it on silent mode Yes, the reason I mentioned this example Saying that I want to read while listening to the Sheikh's reciting
Speaker A
If that was to correct your recitation, I agree with you But if you wanted to ponder, then don't do that Because the level of attention dedicated to the recitation of the Sheikh Won't allow you to ponder as much as you'd like
Speaker A
That's why abstinence from distractions applies here And being patience with it, why? Because you might feel like it is hard work To get a paper and a pen to write down Which might hinder the end goal Be patient
Speaker A
Which is what this generation needs The more you are patient Despite your habit to check the phone - Exactly - Leading to the question...
Speaker A
But in order to complete, how to mind We said that at first, to avoid the tricks Secondly, to abstain, stop and be patient Which will lead you to have questions Regarding your reference and its credibility How everyone claims to be true
Speaker A
How can this be the reference? How would I even know if the God exists?
Speaker A
This is a long story Thirdly, which there is no reasoning without Which is to work To work Learning without practice is called "non reasoning" in Quran That's why one of the nice things What is our definition of ignorance?
Speaker A
The emptiness of the self from both knowledge and work In Kuwait, why do you call kids as ignorant?
Speaker A
Is it just because they don't reason alone? no Despite telling them many times not to do something So, they also don't work to their knowledge So, the third factor is which with the person can reason Is to work
Speaker A
That's why we sadly see a lot nowadays People that watch a lot of YouTube but never act on them - If you don't work - I think this is the definition of intellects here I mean those who consider being intellectual
Speaker A
As having an amount of information While the real intellectual abilities appear through behaviors Which is...
Speaker A
Which is called in the religion As "the scientist" Here I want to mention something which I should have done earlier Do you know that the term jurisprudence of the self exists since the late first Hijri century?
Speaker A
When they used to say "Jurist of the self" Who acts upon his knowledge And prepares to the afterlife This is the "Jurist of the self" The one who understands the self Even some add "Who knows its needs and duties"
Speaker A
"And how to control it" And so, on As some might say Despite that the term might be new as a method But it was known way back in the past Even in the books of Fiqh, it's mentioned many times
Speaker A
"A jurist must be aware of himself" "Before giving Fatwa to others" One might say that in his age...
Speaker A
Most of our viewers are in the age range of 25 to 40 Let's say the average is 32 years Okay?
Speaker A
"I don't frequently pray" "I know I should fix my prayers and do well" They know what they should do Like visiting the family and so on Where should I start from?
Speaker A
What to do? I still have a long way ahead While studies show that In the west That people at the age of 30 are hard to change So, after knowing about such information What should they do then?
Speaker A
My oldest student I can't really call him a student He's Mr. Abdulhamid He's a teacher from the Arab west I think he's near to his eighties Almost eighty If you watch him while talking and doing the assignments and keeping notes
Speaker A
And now he gives lessons to other students You will find no excuse And I have a sister that's 58-year-old, she's a grandmother If you watch her writing down her notes as a student You'll find out that no one is excused
Speaker A
Can this just be an activity for them? No Ask the people around them They transform and change This grandmother I mentioned I was surprised one day by her daughters brining me gifts and perfumes They told me they don't know how to thank me for what I did to their mother
Speaker A
Because after suffering from depression After their father's death, she became alone as they were married While after an advice given to her to attend once She liked what she heard, and if you see her notes as the nerd students
Speaker A
Very detailed with decorations Now, lessons are conducted in her house After suffering from depression She became a shelter for others That seek her views These are examples regarding the issue of the age Where can people start from?
Speaker A
I'll get to it later, but I wanted to give another example first In our Islamic tradition, Most first Muslims...
Speaker A
How old were they? Early on? they were old Yes, some over 30 or 40 Or even 50 After converting, they changed their whole lives Imagine how everything was allowed Then a lot become forbidden in the next day So, let me repeat it again
Speaker A
A lot of western studied are beneficial - It's possible but harder at older ages - For sure That's why, the younger it happens Like how the people who hurt their kids expose them to harder challenges You are making it harder for your child
Speaker A
But for where to start from, I have a 30-second clip that someone made for me Summarizing the jurisprudence of the self Which is the following, firstly, Abstain from distractions, But...
Speaker A
How? Abstain first then decide later... Which is the correct opinion But at least, begin by abstaining Because if you don't, you will never begin Abstain, even if that led to extremism at first It's okay, I don't mind it
Speaker A
Will I ask you to be wise from the first day? You know how sometimes when you attempt to start something They get a bit extreme about it, which is normal But know that the first experience isn't the correct one
Speaker A
Therefore, suddenly, it happens a lot... "Doctor, the child suddenly shut off the TV" "And the phone and everything..." It's okay, allow it for several days "So much that he stopped studying" Here we stop Put him on the right path
Speaker A
So, you must first abstain from distractions How to measure the distractions? Abstain from anything not related to a direct daily achievement Again...
Speaker A
I need to go to school Or college, or work Anything important to achieve this Important for this, shouldn't be abstained from I can't say that I'll abstain from using the car How will you get there?
Speaker A
"I'll abstain from public transports" That's not possible But... "I have too many mugs at home" "So much that I stopped counting them" "But they're important..." Who said they are?
Speaker A
Who said mugs are important? Those are two practical examples The car is important But the mug isn't, and the phone To what extent is it important?
Speaker A
Because I use it to go to work and as such So, I keep it to this limit But how many applications within it aren't important?
Speaker A
"This is how the life goes..." Don't trick yourselves Whoever calls you Just five minutes a day are enough And I visit certain websites By the way, my phone doesn't show any notifications As I believe that the phone is dedicated to me not the other way around
Speaker A
Therefore, I'll go when I want to see Not allowing it to notify me at any time That's why the first thing I do after buying a phone Is to disable all notifications So, the first things is abstinence What to do after abstaining?
Speaker A
Didn't we say, abstinence, stopping and patience Stopping what? my first advise to you What we said about Iqraa Work on it a bit Some ask "why not go immediately to a course about the human self?" Because anything that you'll learn
Speaker A
You'll be asked about where you learned it from You'll say who taught you How do you know it is true? instilling doubt into him So, first of all, learn how to learn Learn how to know that you're on the right path
Speaker A
We assume that we help with that So, first of all, abstinence from distractions And to stop to think if you know how to think Do you know how to reason things?
Speaker A
If I asked you if this post is true or false Will you be able to know?
Speaker A
If I asked you about the validity of the information you got from ChatGPT So, you should filter out your inputs Yes, your inputs and outputs And whether they are true or false as you'll build upon them Lastly, patience can be described as
Speaker A
Forming small habits And to being what build you have As Allah had fated a few days ago That a sister sent me a message Which I had a lecture about the same topic at the same day And I took her permission to play her message to the other sisters
Speaker A
If not for... I'd have played it for you to hear In summary, she thanked me, and she also works in media too She resigned a while ago She told me that the plan of "the least of the least"
Speaker A
Which is a course we provide A plan of five daily tasks that you can't ignore First one is to pray on time Which are five prayers Then the prayer after Al-Fajr, and at Al-Duha With a daily portion of Quran, and the morning prayers and an ending prayer
Speaker A
This is the first thing, secondly Every day, you must seek knowledge What kind of knowledge?
Speaker A
You don't have to study for five hours 15 minutes a day to know a new information are enough We conducted an experiment and the results were sad In a famous mall in Jordan We went to the people in the cafes
Speaker A
We asked everyone older than 14 Three questions in return of three questions The first trivial question How much does this player earn?
Speaker A
The second question Who is the most famous rapper in our region? Third question, how can people earn money through YouTube?
Speaker A
While in return, Tell me how can you know if you are Muslim or not?
Speaker A
Two, what are the pillars of the prayer Thirdly, mention 25 prophets The percentage of who answered the first three is near 90% While less than 3% managed to answer the second three questions It is hard to believe that you're busy learning
Speaker A
As I joke sometimes in the school with my students Who did the assignment? and who didn't?
Speaker A
Then I say "I'm sorry" "I know you are so busy" "With the matters of Gaza and the poor in Nigeria" So, they laugh, knowing that I'm joking What keeps you busy? really You will find a lot of time being wasted
Speaker A
That's why, the second is to seek knowledge Which is divided to two parts, the knowledge of the revelation Which is everything related to your God and religion And something I call inherited knowledge What is it?
Speaker A
You work in the media industry You must read about the media everyday I should be able to ask you about something in your filed that you don't know Or that happened six months ago As a doctor, you must always review the new researches
Speaker A
And everyone in their position And housewives too, they must learn how to raise children This is their job, as I sometimes tell mothers You shouldn't ask me; I should be the one asking you - About raising children - It's your job
Speaker A
Thirdly sports Which we have a big problem with Sadly, I was in elderly gathering a few days ago In which I told them that I don't like how the elderly don't mention this topic But who are the ones interested in health? the body-mania people
Speaker A
From the gym approach which is filled with problem So, why not tackle this topic as we have many Hadiths regarding the body and taking care of it And others that dispraise obesity We have the Hadiths And sports don’t mean the gym, I practice without going to the gym
Speaker A
I have training certificate as I used to be a coach before getting ill I never went to a gym except if I was invited by someone I go to the gym as a visit As you can practice at home, but it turned into a culture
Speaker A
In summary, you could practice by walking for 10 minutes Or even, as for me because I can't...
Speaker A
I practice after prayers With only 50 push-ups and 50 sit-ups This is what I'm allowed to do No one has an excuse not to practice Fourth, the social factor and meeting others Meaning that you must everyday Have a real-life social interaction
Speaker A
Not through the phone Some say I'm in a western country This is an exception Despite that, it should be a bridge to something else The social factor could be through family visits Nowadays, families rarely meet So, today, I should visit my father
Speaker A
And be patient and use my social skills Even if I don't like his stories This is the social factor I even call my driver and get to know him With the intention of social interaction I also ask the seller about the market
Speaker A
And the prices Bit by bit, you can notice the holistic approach we are following Lastly, people find it strange, can you guess what is it?
Speaker A
- Charity work? - No It could be among the social interactions It's Recreation - Recreation? - Yes People find it strange, why?
Speaker A
How can a Sheikh talk about recreation time? As if life is always tough As the Prophet had advised to refresh our hearts Every day, refresh Through doing what causes the self to rest, like a vacation to it, Some say, out of the illusion of perfection,
Speaker A
"But, doctor, I feel like I waste time" Can reading Quran be recreation time for me?
Speaker A
Can...? No! At first, you must find recreational activities to do Like watching good YouTube content that doesn't provide support to undeserving people As sometimes, the recreation time might demolish what we built So, keep it halal and find things you enjoy
Speaker A
Okay? Listen to poetry, or hum while walking Just as recreation time The whole purpose is to sit with yourself Can we add other things to it? maybe later but not at first Meaning that practicing could be the recreation time
Speaker A
Or it could be walking Or it could the social interaction - This is what I'm thinking about - Exactly It could be reading a book But at first, I prefer to keep the recreation time separate And that's it
Speaker A
This is where they should start? This is the least of the least - Do you know what's hard about it? - What?
Speaker A
- Is patience - Which is the last factor? It is patience Because some might complain that I can't only read Even if just one page of the Quran For you, just one Because the people with the illusion of perfection either do it all or none
Speaker A
"I'll read a whole chapter" This might happen in the first day but won't continue That's why the Hadith says "The acts most pleasing to Allah are those which are done most continuously, even if they amount to little" So, continuously, even if they amount to little
Speaker A
Those are the most pleasing acts to Allah If the Prophet himself says those are the best acts How can I still object to that?
Speaker A
How about those who pressure themselves? They won't continue So, continues little is better than interrupted many True I have to say this here Trust me, I do everything that I just said Even more than a person told me
Speaker A
"As an example, they must know that you read a whole chapter a day" But I read only two pages I read the whole Quran twice, one from Ramadan to the next Ramadan Do you know the Quran print of King Fahad?
Speaker A
No, I don't know it Which is wide-spread printed version You know how it begins with a verse and ends with a verse?
Speaker A
You can easily find it anywhere It has around 300... I can't remember But if you read two pages a day You'll finish it in 11 months And in Ramadan, I read it all once more So, I read it from Ramadan to the next one
Speaker A
And one time during Ramadan In the long recitation, you have the time to ponder and correct your recitation As a mother in her forties too Imagine how this mother after graduating from Iqraa course I always advise them to correct their recitation and improve their Arabic
Speaker A
And to learn some grammars and as such She told me that the first thing she and her kids did Was enrolling in a course to correct their recitation She said "I thought I knew how to read" Which is a common mistake by people
Speaker A
When we read, we use our mind to read You imagine that you're reading like Al-Menshawi or Al-Afasi But try to read loudly and you'll be shocked And she took the course to correct her recitation That was at first
Speaker A
After less than a year, she received a certificate In less than a year And completed reading the Sahih of Al-Bukhari She told me that she didn't imagine the amount of knowledge and change that happened to their life Just take it slowly and don't rush
Speaker A
As some of our preachers and figures preach And add heavy burdens to the people "The Ummah needs you!" take it easy, allow him to hold himself first When everyone manages to hold themselves - Take it easy - Which is a mistake
Speaker A
That's why we urge having the qualities of honesty, patience and mercy Have mercy on yourself The Prophet has a beautiful Hadith He said "The believer should not humiliate himself" They said: “How could he humiliate himself?" He said: “By taking on a trial that he cannot deal with.”
Speaker A
To carry more than he can handle Take it easy on yourself and you'll get there Keep it easy so it becomes easy They say that marathon runners have better stamina than the 100-meter racers - Why? - Because they take it slowly
Speaker A
In order to finish his 10-kilometer marathon - So, he takes it easy on himself - The 100-meter runners are much faster Faster, but they'll get tired quickly That's why both have their own races They also say that a flood is but the gathering of droplets
Speaker A
The flood is the gathering of droplets And most fire is from the tiniest of sparks So, which is a nice word to conclude this blessed meeting Remember that you're dealing with who's the most generous Allah is the most generous
Speaker A
Allah isn't like humans who follow your mistakes and don't forgive Rather, he created you and knows your weaknesses and neediness That why I always scare the people that believe in perfection with a phrase I tell them "You're arrogant with Allah"
Speaker A
"I'm not like others" "Reading just two pages?" Who are you dealing with? That's why always seek His mercy and show your weakness to Him Tell Him how weak you are Ask for His mercy as you have nothing elsewise
Speaker A
But the people of perfection deny that They take pride in their efforts What are the efforts compared to a single blessing like the ability to see?
Speaker A
So, keep it simple and take it gradually a continues few is better than an interrupted much And I hope you keep visiting us I'll use it more often Thank a lot, doctor Thank you, Faisal, for the invitation And thanks for your pure intentions
Speaker A
What I say might appear as a compliment But you've blessed your brother On the contrary, we are honored This is your place We always say that we are a bridge between the figures and the people We attempt to do our job with your trust
Speaker A
That builds this crowd You have all the gratitude and it will remain so - May we see you later - If Allah wills - Thank you - Assalamu Alaikum
Topics:فقه النفسعلم النفس الإسلاميالعلاج النفسيالنفس البشريةالصحة النفسيةالتشخيص النفسيالتراث الإسلاميعلم النفس الحديثالأمراض النفسيةالعقل والروح
