Lying To Yourself Is Bad Magic

Explores how lying to oneself hinders magical manifestation and offers honest approaches to improve magical integrity and results.

Key Takeaways

Self-deception undermines magical effectiveness and personal transformation.
Reframing should be distinguished from gaslighting to maintain magical integrity.
Acknowledging true desires without fear is crucial for manifesting success.
Cultural coping mechanisms can mask trauma and block magical progress.
Sacred honesty with oneself is the foundation for all successful magical work.

What the video covers

Lying to oneself, either actively or passively, disrupts magical and manifesting results.
Active lying involves gaslighting oneself by denying reality, often disguised as reframing.
Reframing is a powerful technique that changes perception but differs from gaslighting, which distorts truth.
Gaslighting damages trust in reality signals, making future manifestations harder.
Examples of gaslighting include minimizing trauma or calling abusive relationships karma.
Passive lying involves not admitting what one truly wants due to fear of loss or change.
Honesty about desires and current reality is essential for effective magic and personal growth.
The video emphasizes the importance of integrity and truthfulness in magical practice.
It critiques cultural trends like 'good vibes only' and unconditional self-acceptance without growth.
Practical advice includes recognizing resistance to affirmations and embracing sacred honesty.

Chapters

What is the difference between reframing and gaslighting in magical practice?

Reframing involves changing your perspective to step into a more empowering story, while gaslighting is lying to yourself about reality, which damages trust in your perception and hinders magical results.

Why is lying to yourself harmful for manifestation?

Lying to yourself creates resistance and confusion in your system, preventing you from fully believing in your affirmations and blocking the flow of magical or manifesting energy.

How can I tell if I am gaslighting myself in my magical work?

If your affirmations or beliefs feel forced, cause resistance, or minimize your real feelings or trauma, you might be gaslighting yourself. Honest self-reflection and acknowledging your true feelings help avoid this.

Full Transcript — Download SRT & Markdown

Speaker A

So stop me if you've heard any of these: "My body is beautiful the way it is," "I love myself deeply," "I deserve all wealth and abundance." The trouble is, of course, you probably don't. You probably don't believe that, or at least not 100%.

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And that lack of belief is scuttling your magical and manifesting results. You disgust me. Go on. So this video is a promise I made on my Substack, which is linked up below. I was talking about lying to oneself and gaslighting, and

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how that gets in the way of your magical results. I promised a video, and here it is. But basically, there are two ways, in a magical sense, that we lie to ourselves: actively and passively. Actively is when we think we are doing

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magical targeting, but we are in fact gaslighting ourselves. Passively is when we lie to ourselves about what it is that we actually want. It's not a lie if you believe it. So let's start with actively. Now, I love reframing. Don't

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get me wrong. I think it's a very powerful technique. I was going to say in and out of a magical context, but whenever you do it, it is magical because it is a stepping into our co-creative capacities one way or the other. However,

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pause, when most people think they're doing reframing, what they're actually doing is gaslighting themselves. They are lying about the situation that they find themselves in. Welcome to my [Applause] life. And that not only messes up the particular enchantment that they're

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working on at that point, it actually makes all subsequent enchantments or manifestations more difficult because you are teaching your system not to trust truth signals or reality signals that are coming through. That is literally gaslighting. The good news, though, is it's

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a very easy thing to fix, and once you see it, you will find a whole lot, a whole bunch of persistent magical challenges or not great results, you will find that they all melt away. Your entire system is

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trying its best to do what it thinks you need to do, right? It's our job to make sure that message is clean, and one of the ways we ensure that is to make sure that we're not lying to ourselves. So

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let's begin with reframing and gaslighting, and let's have some definitions of both of them so we know what we're doing. Reframing: changing reality by adjusting our thoughts and feelings to a particular situation, also known as, or AKA, stepping into the right

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story. It's crucial to realize this is not the same thing as always looking on the bright side or always seeing the POS, positive. This fundamentally changes reality by changing your position relating to it. And a really good example,

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a classic example, is the famous story of the three stone cutters. And there's different versions of it all over the world, but we'll just do this one. A traveler was coming along the River Avon, which actually is just the

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Avon, little Old English for you there, H, and he comes across three stonemasons, and he asks the first stonemason, "What are you doing?" to which he replies, "Oh, I'm cornering off this stone." So he asked the second stonemason

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what he's doing, and he says, "Oh, I'm working on these stones to make money to feed my family." And he asked the third stonemason what he's doing, and his reply was, "I am building a cathedral." Reframing is positioning yourself in

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relation to the sacred so that the best possible version of reality can happen. Gaslighting is repeatedly telling yourself something, something you know to be false, until you have a mental breakdown. Very different. Magic, actually, especially the animist kind, relies on

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perception and feeling. In fact, my neighbor here in southern Tasmania, Lee Morgan, traditional witch, says that perhaps we should call the sight the noticing, and this really speaks to the centrality of our sensings and our perceptions to

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reality in general, but especially magical reality. So if you mess with that, if you tell yourself you're, if you're one of those stone masons and you tell yourself you are building a hop house when you're building a cathedral, that's gaslighting. So if you

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tell yourself you deserve wealth and success, but because of very understandably, trust me, childhood trauma or shadows, where you don't actually believe that, maybe your mother told you you won't really amount to much, maybe there are those shadows that are or

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imprints that are still in your field, and you come in and you tell yourself, "I deserve wealth and success," the system's going to respond to that like you're a stone cutter saying you're working on a hop house. Frankly, it sounds made up for

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millennia, literally for millennia, and this is the cornerstone of pretty much every sacred tradition around the world: the truth of the voice of the statement, the word of God, this idea that for us to be successful

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magicians, we must be fully in our integrity. You can't exist in a situation where you are lying to yourself. And there are some easy ways to see magic-specific lies because they look like cope. So listen out for some of

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these. See if any of this sounds familiar either in your life now, in your past, or in the life of some of your friends. Consider an abusive relationship, physically, sexually, emotionally. Have you or anyone you've ever known called that something like karma

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or problems with astrological synastry when perhaps it is instead another invitation to heal some of that childhood attachment trauma? The flip side of that might be, are you currently telling everyone you're a 10 when you are a generous six at least

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currently, so that you have already made an excuse for the absence of romantic relationships or the repeated failure of romantic relationships? What about if you are underpaid or bullied at work or hate your job, yet refuse to leave? Are you

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calling that job, that bad job, like a learning opportunity, or are you heeding the invitation for that to be a call to boundary work, to what is and isn't acceptable for you in your life? You pretty much know it's cope if it has an

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invalidating impact on your life or it minimizes the trauma that you were going through. The relationship example is the best one there, that if you think it's karma or some sort of past life entanglement, that it is your lot in life to be mistreated, that's a gaslight that allows you to dampen a trauma response. This also includes very obviously, and many people have pointed this out, the whole good vibes only thing, which isn't really

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so prevalent in magic anymore, mercifully, but that is almost always a result of a childhood where you were not allowed to express your authentic emotional responses. It happens more to women, happens more to girls, but you were not allowed to be emotional in

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a childhood home, so you were taught instead to convey, "Everything's fine, I'm fine with what's going on." When you see good vibes only, it is a very obvious gaslight that it emerges from a, I guess fortunately, very obvious trauma that is calling you

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to look at. A variant of that would be, in the current cultural milieu, there is an expectation that we don't need to change or improve. We are just to be accepted as we are now. In both of these cases, in the

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good vibes only case or in the case that you're perfect the way you are and you just have to be accepted for, you know, this is just what your personality is like or this is just what you look like,

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with no invitation to change or improve for yourself or anyone else, what happens there is that you can lose the signals from the cosmos inviting you to turn yourself and the cosmos into something better. They're both covering over and

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dampening the signals that your system needs to respond and develop and transform. Let's move on to the other way we ruin our lives and our magic by lying to ourselves, and that's passively. Simply put, that is by not actually admitting

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what it is that we want. And when we do this, it is always and without exception because we are scared of losing or think we can't live without the thing we assume we have to give up. So if you are

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in a loveless or sexless relationship, we lie to ourselves.

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in a Loveless or sexless uh relationship we lie to ourselves or minimize the of that or the validity of that desire because the thing we don't want to give up is a stable or known home environment and circle of friends and all the rest

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of the things that get put at risk and we do indeed lose when we go through a relationship breakup or let's say you wanted to study art in Florence but you never manag to leave Chicago because you are concerned about your parents'

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response your family family and friends reaction to you leaving potentially a family business or even the the family Shadows of of going out and and making something of yourself you are in those situations scared to lose whether it's

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healthy or not the approval that you get from submitting to a family story but here's the thing what we really want will always come about 90% of manifesting happens at the unconscious so up there in that 10% in the conscious

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you might be wrangling with what Mommy and Daddy will think about you going to Florence but in the meantime you're unconscious because it knows that this is the desire that wants to come from the cosmos through you and

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out into existence well it's going to let's say change which is to say bring down your life uh if if you get in its way and we know this from the Gospel of Thomas to paraphrase if you don't bring

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forth what is within you what is within you will destroy you so the person in that sexless marriage will have a toret affair that will not just end the relationship but strain the family and friendship connections anyway the

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aspiring painter will also unconsciously conspire to have a serious falling out uh with the family to make sure that the system is sufficiently disentangled from all those webs to bring about what it wants I've I've have friends and and

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former colleagues who have lost their careers because there was a conflict going on in their system between going on a a health and in this case a bodybuilding Journey uh and not admitting how much they wanted that and

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it was getting in the way of their work to the point that they ended up losing their job by being late or leaving early or otherwise maximizing a uh a bodybuilding Health Journey at the cost of everyone else they were working with

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and for this is an example of a failure to understand or lying to yourself about what it is you really want and all that does is set up conditions that the cosmos flowing through you which is what desire truly is will just knock over

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will just blow down like a house of straw if you have to force the cosmos to bring about what it is you and it actually wants by clandestine means watch out you you are inviting the bad kind of chaos everywhere so what should

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we do about it then well beginning with the passive beginning with trying to avoid this chaos step into the understanding that the system is always right there's no incorrect desire the system is always right and is always going to win your conscious mind is the

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surfer and the whole Cosmos and your unconscious is the ocean are the w your conscious task is one of directing and channeling and conducting and thus co-creating the beneficial outflow of the unconscious of the cosmos out into your world it's not trying to

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flatten the waves or pretend that they're not there and we start with what to do about the the uh the passive lying to ourselves about what it is we actually want because getting that right allows us to step forward and change the

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active lying to ourselves about what we want which is the gaslighting and simply put what we do here and you can use this one as an affirmation even is only use believable affirmations or manifestation statements now this is materially

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different to what a cult historian Mitch Horowitz might call the big hairy audacious goal so let's say you want to be CEO of a sportsware company it's quite a good example actually because presumably you'll have to go on a

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physical fitness journey as well as a career journey to achieve that that's still your main goal that's still the beag your big hairy audacious goal the steps to get there are those smaller targets where the temptation to Gaslight yourself comes in

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where the temptation to say I am well wealthy when you're not yet wealthy or uh I am physically fit or I love my Sportsman's body if they're not 100% true if you close your eyes and you say a statement and it hits resistance

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anywhere in there you're at risk of gaslighting yourself so it's at this level down that we only use believable affirmations and this is that reframing animist perspectivist magic and and it's real power because it doesn't mean only use

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small or existing statements in cidal Magic I actually have a name for them they're called Robo Fish no it's about finding a true statement like building a cathedral on the way to that bigger statement so if you close your eyes and

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by the way if you can do this you also need a YouTube channel but if you close your eyes and you 100% believe that your body is perfect and perfectly beautiful in the sense of desirable the way it

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is and there's no resistance I uh I didn't realize that many superm models watch this channel let me put it that way what you do instead is find something about yourself that you do like 100% And in an

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uncomplicated way you might say I have I have really beautiful eyes I have nice titties whatever it is those are the statements that allow you to generate a field in the direction of what it is you want so I love myself completely that's

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another one that uh you've had a perfect childhood if you can hit that at 100% well done you've done a lot of work if not this is an unlock that you can use for a lot of them I believe myself

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capable or I believe I will one day love myself completely that you okay that what I can do there is no internal resistance when I say that one because when you encounter resistance to a statement that let's say you logically should believe

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is true like why don't I love myself like logically I I get it and logically I do deserve love or logically I do deserve wealth and abundance but when it hits things in there you have an energy print or or a childhood trauma there

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that is inviting you to alchemize or transform and when you do that that's the unlock that that brings the rest of it online of course so whatever it is you're after on the Tactical basis when it comes to those personal

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transformation statements drop down to where it is 100% And operate from there find the 100% that is pointing you in the direction you want to go go and allow the system to recognize a beautiful and truthful statement allow that to change your

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energy field which is going to bring in different scenarios and situations in your life and then try the next one and then try the next one and build out from a place of Truth rather than gaslighting because what we're really talking about

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with these two approaches is being honest about what you want and being honest about where you're at do not be in a state of resistance to either of those things because what we resist persists bring that sacred honesty to

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your situation and watch your whole life transform

Topics:magicmanifestationself-deceptiongaslightingreframingintegritypersonal growthtraumaspiritualityRune Soup

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