Life-Changing ADHD Advice I Wish I Knew Sooner — Transcript

If you have ADHD and you feel like life is harder than it should be, then here are nine life-changing pieces of advice I wish someone told me sooner. If you're new here, I'm Eugene. I'm a dopamine coach for the ADHD mind, and I'm also completing my masters in neuroscience. All right, advice number one is food equals medicine. Eat food like it's medicine, or else you will be eating medicine like it's food. This phrase is so important for people with ADHD. The reason being, okay, our whole brain is very different than neurotypicals. They have a regulated dopamine system. Our dopamine system is dysregulated. And food affects our dopamine system more than you think.

So, dopamine is required for you to what? Focus and feel motivated, right? But guess what? Right here, different types of food will spike our dopamine and drop us lower than expected. And these are like, for example, your snacks, your processed food that we love. We love processed food, we love sugar, we love fat. But every time our brain feels that pleasure, feels that dopamine, we have a bigger drop than neurotypicals. If I were to explain a neurotypical, look at this, right? A neurotypical, they already have more dopamine circulating in their system. And when they eat food, they're great, and then they go down after they finish their food, and then they recover back to baseline. Right? So that's a neurotypical brain. An ADHD brain is very different. We have a lower baseline, less of a spike. So, we go up when we eat the processed food, the donuts, the sugar, the anything that gives us a dopamine kick. And guess what? We drop lower than baseline. And we take longer to recover back to baseline, right? But before people have time to recover, when they're at their lowest, they go for another snack. They go for, let's say, another cookie, another ice cream, another whatever your favorite snack is. And then we have a bigger drop. And then down here is when we lack focus. That's when we lack motivation.

Okay. So very important here is eat food like it's your medicine. Know the content. So stay away from refined carbs, processed food, and make sure that you get a healthy diet. And that is like the Mediterranean diet. Pro, uh, whole foods, get a lot of protein in. Protein, protein is necessary. Increase protein dosage because they are the precursor to dopamine. So you want to avoid processed food, refined carbs, sugar because they give you a bigger crash than neurotypicals. So that is advice number one. Eat food like it's your medicine, or you'll be eating medicine like it's your food. All right. Number two, pleasure generates pain and pain generates pleasure. So what do I mean by this? Think about it like this. What happens when your body gets too hot? When you're outside and your body gets really too, too hot, right? You start to sweat.

You start to sweat to cool down. So when you are hot, you sweat to cool down. That's how your body reacts. And this is what we call homeostasis.

All right? And when you are too cold, your body shivers to generate heat. That's a surprising thing about our body. We always like to go balance, which is homeostasis.

So what happens is if you're indulging in too much pleasure. So this is scrolling.

This is what, what else is pleasure? Sugar. This is online shopping. TV show, right? What happens? You'll notice this, and this is especially, especially true for people with ADHD. We feel this so much more. Our body starts to feel pain. Not our body, our mind. We start to feel like crap, right? We start to feel like crap so that we can, so pleasure will generate pain in our mind. Now, let's reverse it.

That's, that's what we call homeostasis. Pleasure will generate pain. So you notice all the stress, all the, what else is there? All the anxiety, all the overwhelm that comes from too much pleasure. We have to balance it. That's how our brain works. That's how humans work. We always have homeostasis. Okay. So how do we flip it back around? So pain, pain, perceived pain in terms of, let's say, walking, running, right, gym, right? What happens after you do these activities? You feel pleasure. It feels amazing. You get that euphoria, you get that high, runner's high, for example. You run, it's, ah, so painful, but afterwards you feel accomplished and euphoric. That is your body balancing, right? So that's what we have to do. So you feel pleasure, and that comes from, ooh, I feel achieved, accomplished, my mood is good, right? These all increase. So pain could be like even yoga, meditation could be painful for you, whatever you feel that feels painful. The more you do it, the more pleasure you feel. So you have to remember it's perceived pain and perceived pleasure, right? So for example, if I do not like TV shows, if I'm watching TV shows, but I don't really like TV shows, then I'm not going to feel pain afterwards because it's perceived pleasure. But if I really like sugar so much that it gets me such a huge hit, then I am going to feel all of this afterwards because there's a pleasure-pain balance. Just like how our body reacts to heat and reacts to cold, we shiver because it's cold. We sweat because we're hot. Same thing. If we have too much pleasure, we will feel pain. If we have too much pain, we will feel pleasure. Next, number three. Similar concept to the one we just talked about. Boredom equals healing.

Repeat this phrase in your head all the time. Boredom is a sign that my brain is healing. Boredom is a sign that my brain is healing. Boredom is also a perceived pain, right? So the more that you sit in boredom and the more you're able to endure that boredom, then you will feel like your brain is slowly going to receive pleasure. You're slowly healing your brain. This is difficult for people with ADHD because we always want, oh my god, we're like, "Oh, I, oh, I don't, I hate, hate boredom. I, I, I can't, I, I just need to scroll on my phone. If my phone is next to me, I will scroll. If my iPad is next to me, I'll do that. If my laptop is, is there, I'm going to start doing laptop stuff." That is why our brains aren't healing. We need to sit in boredom. For example, think about it. If you are commuting, right? If you are commuting to work,

what are you doing during that commute? Are you listening to novel music? Are you listening to podcasts? If you are watching TV, if you are listening to a stimulating podcast, if you are listening to like novel music, you are not choosing that time to sit in boredom. We have the opportunity to sit in boredom while commuting to work. I know it's difficult. Oh, wait, hold on.

So, I apologize for those of you who sit in boredom and feel really tired while commuting to work. Uh, please do not do this because you might really need a TV, a podcast, or novel music to stay awake. This means that you have sleep deprivation and you have to fix your sleep. But just remember, if you're able to sit alone in your car, your brain will heal. Okay? If you, if you're able to sit in a car with boredom, your brain will slowly heal. So, commute in silence. People keep asking me, "Hey, Eugene, like I, boredom hurts." Like, what do I do? Like boredom is a sign that your brain is healing. Sit in boredom for a minimum of two weeks and you'll notice a dramatic, dramatic change in your mood, your focus, your motivation, less procrastination, less overwhelm. All right, number four. This is the next one. Consistency in anything. Like if you want to be consistent in the gym,

you want to consistently do work, you want to consistently exercise, go to yoga, anything that you want to do consistently has to start with a consistent sleep schedule. All right?

So, if anyone asks me, if any of my clients ask me, they're like, "Hey, Eugene, I, I struggle to be consistent." The first thing I tell them is like, "How is your sleep schedule? What time are you sleeping? And are you waking up and sleeping at the same time every single day?" And if they're not doing that, it's impossible. Let me repeat this. It's impossible to be consistent because you hav

you start to sweat to cool down. So when you are hot, you sweat to cool down. That's how your body reacts. And this is what we call homeostasis.

All right? And when you are too cold, your body shivers to generate heat. That's a surprising thing about our body. We always like to go balance which is homeostasis.

So what happens is if you're indulging in too much pleasure. So this is scrolling.

This is what what else is pleasure? Sugar. This is online shopping. TV show, right? What happens? You'll notice this, and this is especially especially true for people with ADHD. We feel this so much more. Our body starts to feel

pain. Not our body, our mind. We start to feel like crap, right? We start to feel like crap so that we can so pleasure will generate pain in our mind. Now, let's reverse it.

That's that's what we call homeostasis. Pleasure will generate pain. So you notice all the stress, all the what else is there? All the anxiety, all the overwhelm that comes from too much pleasure. We have to balance it. That's how our brain works.

That's how humans work. We always has have homeostasis. Okay. So how do we flip it back around? So pain pain perceived pain in terms of let's say walking running right gym right what happens after you do these activity you

feel feel pleasure it feels amazing you get that euphoria you get that high runners high for example you run it's ah so painful but afterwards you feel accomplished and euphoric that is your body balancing right so that's what we

have to do. So you feel pleasure and that comes from ooh I feel achieved accomplished my mood is good right these all increase so pain could be like even yoga meditation could be painful for you whatever you feel that feels painful the

more you do it the more pleasure you feel so you have to remember it's perceived pain and perceived pleasure right so for example if I do not like TV shows. If I'm watching TV shows, but I don't really

like TV shows, then I'm not going to feel pain afterwards cuz it's perceived pleasure. But if I really like sugar like so much that it gets me such a huge hit, then I am going to feel all of this

afterwards because there's a pleasure pain balance. Just like how our body reacts to heat and reacts to cold, we shiver because it's cold. We sweat because we're hot. Same thing. If we have too much pleasure, we will feel

pain. If we have too much pain, we will feel pleasure. Next, number three. Similar concept to the one we just talked about. Boredom equals healing.

Repeat this phrase in your head all the time. Boredom is a sign that my brain is healing. Boredom is a sign that my brain is healing. Boredom is also a perceived pain, right? So the more that you sit in

boredom and the more you're able to endure that boredom, then you will feel like your brain is slowly going to receive pleasure. You're slowly healing your brain. This is difficult for people with ADHD because we always want, oh my

god, we're like, "Oh, I Oh, I don't I hate hate boredom. I I I can't I I just need to scroll on my phone. If my phone is next to me, I will scroll. If my iPad is next to me, I'll do that. If my

laptop is is there, I'm going to start doing laptop stuff. That is why our brains aren't healing. We need to sit in boredom. For example, think about it. If you are commuting, right? If you are commuting to work,

what are you doing during that commute? Are you listening to novel music? Are you listening to podcasts? If you are watching TV, if you are listening to a stimulating podcast, if you are listening to like novel music, you are

not choosing that time to sit in boredom. We have the opportunity to sit in boredom while commuting to work. I know it's difficult. Oh, wait, hold on.

So, I apologize for those of you who sit in boredom and feel really tired while commuting to work. Uh, please do not do this because you might really need a TV, a podcast or a novel music to stay

awake. This means that you have sleep deprivation and you have to fix your sleep. But just remember, if you're able to sit alone in your car, your brain will heal. Okay? If you if you're able to sit in a car with boredom, your brain

will slowly heal. So, commute in silence. People keep asking me, "Hey, Eugene, like I boredom hurts." Like it's what do I do? Like boredom is a sign that your brain is healing. Sit in boredom for a minimum of

2 weeks and you'll notice a dramatic dramatic change in your mood, your focus, your motivation, less procrastination, less overwhelm. All right, number four. This is the next one. Consistency in anything. Like if you want to be consistent in the gym,

you want to consistently do work, you want to consistently exercise, go to yoga, anything that you want to do consistently has to start with a consistent sleep schedule. All right?

So, if anyone asks me, if any of my clients ask me, they're like, "Hey, Eugene, I I struggle to be consistent." The first thing I tell them is like, "How is your sleep schedule? What time are you sleeping? and are you waking up

and sleeping at the same time every single day? And if they're not doing that, it's impossible. Let me repeat this. It's impossible to be consistent because you have a disregulated circadian rhythm. So very important here is same sleep time and wake up at the

wake up at the same time, sleep at the same time. So, for example, 10:00 p.m.

you go out and go to sleep and 6 a.m. you want to wake up. And you do that Monday to Sunday. So, even on the weekends, you have to do it. Then your life will start to feel like there's

something consistent going on. And you can start to add in the gym. You can start to take a walk, go to yoga. So, consistency is very important. It has to start with your sleep schedule. So to explain this, if you do not do this, you

have a disregulated circadian rhythm. If you have a disregulated circadian rhythm, your energy levels throughout the day fluctuates. It's like, oh, sometimes maybe you're a night owl.

That's because you have a disregulated circadian rhythm. So how can you do anything consistent when your energy levels goes up and down? So let me tell you this, right? So once you regulate your consistency your your sleep schedule your dopamine levels should go

like this in the morning is the most amount of dopamine so high right and then in the afternoon is less high and then at night is the lowest right that is a normal energy level and now you can

be consistently okay let's go for exercise every single day in the morning and you can keep doing that because you have the right amount of energy. So imagine you're have a disregulated circadian rhythm and it goes like this, right? How

do you know when like you want to exercise here? You're going to find it hard. It just makes it very difficult for you to keep anything consistent when you have a disregulated circadian rhythm. So please, number four is

consistency in anything starts with a consistent sleep schedule. All right, that brings me to number five. move your body to calm your mind. So, if you didn't know, cortisol, which is the stress hormone, if I spelled it wrong, I

apologize. So, cortisol is a stress hormone. And if you keep it in the brain, you're constantly going to stress. So, you think about like, oh, this this this oh stress stress stress, right? But the interesting thing is that this is me drawing an R like a

okay this is the interesting thing is if let's say you're stressed in the brain this is your brain if the cortisol is stored here you're stressed but there's a way to get that cortisol out the way to get

the cortisol out is into your muscles and the way to get the cortisol out in the muscles is if you Move your body.

If you move your body, the cortisol in your mind, the stress, the overwhelm, the whatever cortisol that is in your mind that is stimulating your brain, when you move your body, it goes into your muscle, right? And then your brain

starts to stress less and you feel calm, right? So when anyone asks me like, Eugene, I'm I'm constantly stressed. I'm constantly I I'm I'm I'm overwhelmed. Well, the easy solution here if you want an immediate effect is start to move your

body. If you notice the cortisol is building in your brain, use it. Use it to your muscle. Go to the gym, go do yoga, go walk, run, however you want to move your body. Just just even at home, you can do jumping jacks. that

will help you de-stress immediately. And if you're finding this video valuable, please consider liking and subscribing and that will help me continue to make these videos every single week. All right, number six is you act like the person you believe

you are. This is so important. What are you playing in your brain? What are you telling yourself is so so important. So this is the loop that I want you all to understand. All right. A if you sit in a

thought, this is by I think Dr. Joe Despensza. All right. If you sit in a thought for 90 seconds, right? It becomes a feeling. All right.

To give you an example is if you sit in a thought, let's say I'm not doing enough, right? If you're sitting in I I'm not doing enough as a thought for over 90 seconds, it becomes a feeling.

And that feeling is going to be negative. It's going to be like overwhelm, right? And if you sit in that overwhelm feeling, a feeling sit there for hours now. It becomes a mood, right? So if you sit in the overwhelm for a couple hours,

your mood starts to be like constant stress, right? And now if you sit in that mood for like days, right? If you sit in that mood for days, it becomes a temperament. It becomes a temperament. So if you're sitting in

that stress mood for days, you start identifying with it. You're like, "Okay, it's temperament. So I'm like always behind." Now, if you sit in that temperament for weeks, it starts to become a personality or your identity. So, if you're always

sitting in always behind, then you start to identify with someone that is not enough, constantly behind, and that is dangerous. All right? So a thought in 90 seconds like not doing enough, you start to feel overwhelmed. And if you sit in

that feeling overwhelmed for hours, then you'll start to stress and you that becomes a mood. And if your mood if you sit in that stress for days, it becomes a temperament. So you're always like, I'm always behind. I'm always behind.

And if you sit in that temperament for weeks, it starts to become a personality. Now you identify yourself as someone that is always behind. So let me tell you this. This can be broken.

How do we break this? So imagine you sit in a thought like for example you're like hey I actually showed up for myself. I did something that is productive. Right? So you sit in wow I achieved. And you really sit in that

feeling you start to feel what? You start to feel like accomplished right? And if you sit in the accomplishment feeling for hours, it starts to be like, oh, ex energized.

Like your mood is like, wow, amazing, right? It feels great. It feels amazing. And you sit in that amazing mood for days. Imagine that amazing mood. Your temperament is like always excited, energized, energized, right? So you're just like, "Wow, I feel

great because I've been accomplishing." And you start to identify with a person who is actually achieving, right? And then as you sit for that that temperament for weeks, your personality becomes high energy, always achieving, right? So the formula for this is change

or thought, you will change your personality. You act like the person you believe you are. So all it is is really pay attention to your thought. What are you telling yourself over and over again? We got to break that pattern. Once you

break that pattern, you can start to identify with the new thought and you'll slowly rewire your brain. All right.

Advice number seven is negativity is doomcrolling internally. So, if you think that you're constantly overthinking or like the anxiety, the stress, the the all the thing, the all that, oh, I'm not enough, like what we just talked about, if

you're negatively talking to yourself, you're basically doom scrolling internally, right? It's like you're just like, oh, next. Okay. Oh, next. Uh, negative, negative, negative. And this is a vicious cycle. The vicious cycle is because it gives you a cortisol

spike, right? gives you a cortisol spike. It's just like oof oo feel something feel something. That's because we always want stimulation. So imagine this, right?

Always like to use this example is I put you in this empty room. This empty room for 24 hours. Nothing but this red button. And this red button here, it gives you an electric shock. Right?

Would you let's say let's make this into a neurotypical, right? Neurotypical. A neurotypical would sit in that room for 24 hours and they'll push that button once and it gives you it gives them an electric shock. They're like, "Oh, ow. I

I I I don't I don't want to do it. I don't want to do it again." But someone with ADHD, now an ADHD person would do it. And he is push push that button one time and it gives them a mild

electric shock. You're like, "Oh, oh wow." Okay. Yeah, pushing this is better is actually quite stimulating cuz it gives me a cortisol spike that gives them a stimulation. So they're just they're just going to keep pushing it because they rather push that button

than sit in a room by themselves because it gives them a cortisol spike. So we are actually pushing that button internally. We're like negativity negativity cuz we want to feel something. All right. So now that you know this, if negativity is doomcrolling

internally, what we really need to do is to break that cycle. Right? To break that cycle, the first step is awareness.

Now that I've told you this, you know that negativity is doom scrolling in the brain. You have to stop doom scrolling.

So all it is is to notice that you're in this loop. And what you want to do is when you're in this loop, you can break it by what we talked about moving your body or focusing on the present. Take a a few

deep breaths. For example, right? If you do that, you stop doom scrolling in the mind. The more you doom scroll, remember, think about it like this. The more you doom scroll, the more it's harder to quit. the more it's harder to

quit because remember like when people are doom scrolling you get lost in a spiral right so that's what we don't want you to do once you are aware that you're in this loop break it by going moving or focusing on your breath all

right number eight is if you can't quit something add friction if you can't quit something add friction so people with ADHD we love stimul stimulation. We always seek novelty and stimulation. So what we want to do is for example, let's

say your mobile phone or let's say a TV series, right? If your mobile phone is right next to you, it's right next to you. It's hard for our brains, our ADHD brains to be like, "Oh, no. I don't want

this." We just keep going. We just want that stimulation, so we're going to grab it. If your TV is right next to you and Netflix is subscribed, then it's easy to click. So if you want to quit, TV,

cancel your subscription. That makes it a lot harder for you to reactivate it. True, our current society makes everything so simple, but we have to consciously add friction if you want to quit something. Mobile phones, don't place it by your desk. Place it under

your pillow, for example. Add more friction. sugar. If you want a quick sugar, add more friction. Throw all your sugar away so you stop getting it. ADHD, out of sight, out of mind. All right?

So, adding friction makes it so much easier for us to quit. My apartment here has no TV. I do not have a TV because I know if there's a TV, I'm going to lie on the couch and switch it on. And

that's really bad for the brain. We don't want to stimulate our brain too much. Remember what we said here right here. Pleasure generates pain and pain generates pleasure. If we make pleasure too excessible, then it becomes inevitable for us to

actually indulge in pleasure. But if you want to add friction, it makes it way more difficult for us because we're like, "Oh my god, I have to walk to a a a grocery shop to get a chocolate bar."

Nah. And then our brain heals. That's what we need to do. Okay? So add if you can't quit, add friction.

Next, the last but the most important one. This the most most important. I'm going to even highlight it in red. Okay.

Make progress your addiction. This one is the most important one that I want to talk about.

People with ADHD, we are addicted to dopamine, right? We're addicted to anything that gives us a kick because we're low on dopamine and we want to feel normal. We want to feel okay. We want to feel like we have good mood. And

that is dopamine. And there's actually a way for you to get dopamine. How do you feel when you do this task one, task two, task three, and you're like, "Oh my god, wow, I finished task one. I finish

everything on my to-do list." You get an elevate in dopamine. You feel good, right? That is the best source of dopamine. not scrolling on your phones, not binge watching something, not online shopping. This right here is the best

source of progress. So, every day if you can do a checklist and accomplish them as much as you can, celebrate it. That is the best form of dopamine. And you see a lot of people like Bill Gates, like uh Michael Phelps, like Richard

Branson who all have ADHD, they thrive because they made their addiction progress because our brains are already addicted to dopamine. So why not make it addicted to something that is positive?

So progress is what I call clean dopamine, not cheap dopamine, clean. And it's also effort based. You have to accomplish something. You have to accomplish something and after you accomplish it, you get it. It's not instant. It's not instant like, oh, I

can just check off these boxes. No, you you got to do something to check them off. And that is the most natural source of dopamine. And that are the nine things I wish someone told me sooner.

And I hope that you've been receiving so much value. And if you haven't subscribed yet, I might not even see you again. But if you have, I hope my videos have been providing so much value to you every single week. I will keep uploading

free free value to you all. And thank you so much for this opportunity for me to change your life because that is my purpose. I'll see you in the next