Speaker A
All right, listen up, going to be a pretty good video, how to properly message women and set dates using dating apps in 2025.
Learn how to message women on dating apps in 2025 by using high-status photos, strategic messaging, and timing to attract genuinely interested matches.
Key Takeaways
- High-quality, status-conveying photos are essential to get matches on dating apps.
- Women messaging first with enthusiasm is a key indicator of genuine interest.
- Limit messaging frequency to avoid appearing desperate and create an illusion of high status.
- Women respond to perceived status and emotional fantasy rather than actual real-world value.
- Setting a clear masculine-to-feminine dynamic early in conversation increases attraction.
Summary
- The video teaches a comprehensive strategy for messaging women on dating apps in 2025 to secure dates with women who show high interest.
- Emphasizes the critical importance of having high-status photos that appeal to the female lens of attraction as a prerequisite for getting matches.
- Explains that women optimize for attention and filter matches based on genuine interest, requiring men to filter for women with high enthusiasm.
- Recommends waiting for women to message first to satisfy hypergamy and to avoid appearing desperate by limiting texts to one per day.
- Suggests letting conversations expire and using rematch features on apps like Bumble to signal high status and non-thirstiness.
- Highlights that women are attracted to illusions of value and perception of status rather than real-world value.
- Describes setting a polarizing masculine-to-feminine dynamic early in messaging to attract feminine women with genuine desire.
- Identifies signs of high interest in messages such as women elongating greetings with repeated letters (e.g., 'Heyyyy').
- Shares personal testing and community feedback to validate the effectiveness of these strategies.
- Encourages viewers to join the creator’s community for deeper training on dating app success and female attraction.
Full Transcript — Download SRT & Markdown
Speaker A
Okay, I have put a lot of hours into this to learn this skill, I'm here to transfer this skill to you, and I'm here to make sure that you know how to select and filter your dates to apply to only women with high interest in you.
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Okay, this is the most important thing with dating apps is obviously since women are going to optimize for added attention, and that includes attention from anybody and everybody, you have to actually be able to filter who genuinely wants to see you in real life and who doesn't.
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So, because of that, I have an entire strategy, I have an entire process, this works very well, so stick with me, you're going to love the video.
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Now, first and foremost, okay, your pictures need to convey high status and appeal to the female lens of attraction.
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Because I'm here to let you in on a little secret.
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Without this prerequisite step, you will get zero matches.
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Okay, so you're not going to be messaging anybody if you don't dial in your photos.
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Without this prerequisite step of having pictures that convey high status and pictures that actually appeal to the female lens of attraction, you will not be matching with anybody.
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So, inside of our community, let me give you an example.
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We crossed over 1800 members and guys are saying things like this.
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He goes, "Language of women is gold, I just want to say thank you for creating this brotherhood, Casey, and helping us in regaining our masculinity.
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I'm glad to be here, so much value."
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Okay, inside of our community, I have two things to show you.
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The first is our dating app secrets, and I also give you a full comprehensive training.
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How to appeal to the female lens of attraction inside of my community.
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So, check that out once this video is over, but this is what you have to understand.
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Without this prerequisite step of dialing in your photos, you get no matches.
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So, why is this so important?
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Okay, why is the picture so important, why is the pictures actually conveying some kind of high status important?
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Because here's the thing that you have to remember.
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In 2025, right now, framing and leverage is everything.
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Okay, there's a lot of men right now attempting to get dates, because of that, it's getting harder and harder.
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So, women need to message you first, and it needs to be with high interest and enthusiasm.
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Not only is it just message you first, they have to message you first with high interest and with enthusiasm.
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So, this is what it looks like.
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If she doesn't message you with high interest and enthusiasm, there is literally no point in trying to entertain that.
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If she just types the word, "Hi," okay, you can clearly see that that is not very high of interest.
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However, if she puts, "Hey, handsome, how's your day?" or if she types to you, "You're so fine," which is the type of messages that you're going to get if you have strategic appeal to your photo.
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These are the types of messages to entertain.
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Okay, so first and foremost, before I even dive into how to actually message women properly.
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You have to dial this in, you have to dial in your photos.
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They have to convey high status and it has to appeal to the female lens of attraction.
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That's first.
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Okay, moving on.
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Now we're going to go to this column.
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So, once they match you, you need to wait until they message you first to satisfy hypergamy.
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This is the biggest thing that I've noticed that has changed from like, let's say, 2018, 2019, 2020.
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To 2025, there has been a shift.
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Back in the day, you could actually get dates by texting them first, you could actually arrange, um, you know, a date or something like that.
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Today, it's not like that.
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Attention is more and more common, so because of that, they are filtering for who they want.
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And a lot of times it's purely based on how you look through that photo.
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So, they need to message you first to satisfy hypergamy.
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Here's what I can tell you, once they match you.
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Go as close to a full day as possible without messaging them.
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For example.
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There's even, uh, different apps, like one of them, if you use like Bumble, for example.
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I would even recommend, um.
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Letting the whole conversation expire past that 24 hours and then clicking the rematch button.
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Okay, where it actually has to let you rematch them.
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So, you waited that whole day and the match even expired.
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You want to signal that you're not thirsty.
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Okay, the rule that I use is only send about one text per day.
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Okay, one text per, let's say, 12 to 24 hours in that range.
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That's going to make you come off as not desperate.
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It's going to make it seem like you're not thirsty.
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So, the reason why we're doing this, and what I call this is this is just a basic time delay.
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Women do these same things, okay, they stretch out their options for days or weeks.
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Until they finally agree to see the guy.
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The reason why you're stretching it out is because you're giving the illusion of pre-selection and the illusion of high status.
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So, if you're able to see her or text her back right away that night, it's going to obviously appear like you're single.
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Nowadays, women really don't want men who are 100% single, she will typically optimize for a guy who has a couple options already.
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And that means if you don't, you need to make it look like you're already potentially seeing someone.
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So, you're basically tied up through the week.
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So, you don't have a lot of time to text her.
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If you start texting her a lot right away, even if she likes your photos and even if she messages you first with high interest.
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If you start texting her a lot right away, she'll probably just unmatch you.
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How do I know this?
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Because I've tested all of this.
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A lot of times I will even test things not to do in order to purposefully fail to prove that this is what women do when you do the wrong things.
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I do this all the time.
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So, to women's attraction, okay, or to women, okay, their attraction mechanisms.
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Everything is based off an illusion of status.
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So, this is what you have to remember.
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Women don't fall in love with your real world value, women fall in love with illusions of value and your perception that you're able to give off.
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So, say that with me one more time.
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They don't fall in love with your real world value.
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In fact, I would even say that they don't care.
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They only care about illusions of value and the perception of status that you're able to put in front of them.
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Since they follow their emotions.
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It's purely based on their fantasy or their mindset or the illusion that she has of you.
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It's her perception.
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And perception can change really quick.
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Sadly, in today's world, real world value a lot of times doesn't hold a lot of weight.
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Okay, it doesn't give you a lot of pull when it comes to if you will get responses back or not.
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So, this is what I do.
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Okay, what I do, what I have found works best.
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In order to attract the women with genuine desire in me who are also feminine.
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Is I try to set a polarizing masculine to feminine dynamic right out of the gate.
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As soon as the messages begin.
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I'll say something like this.
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So, you can see in this picture, she goes, "Good morning, Casey."
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And she put a bunch of O's, um, for the word good.
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And women will typically do this when they have high interest, she will send you the word, "Hey," with like four or five Y's.
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Or, "Hi," with like five letter I's right beside it.
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This is how women show high interest, I don't know why they do it that way.
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But that's what they do is they just.
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In order for them to show high interest, they think that the best way of doing it is putting a bunch of the same letter.
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So, that means high interest.
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Okay, so, um, she put, "Good morning, Casey."
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And then right out of the gate, I just set a typical like masculine to feminine dynamic.
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So, she says, "Good morning," and I say, "Hi, cutie.
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Make me lots of food and keep me full.
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I get hungry."
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And her reply was, "Guess I'll get an extra ribeye just for you then."
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Okay, so what I send is like a few messages in a row.
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So, that way it's like notification, notification, notification, but it's still one message.
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Because all of these were sent within 10 seconds.
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This is how I prefer my text messages to be structured.
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It's short and sporadic.
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I have never been a fan of long paragraphs or multiple sentences.
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I think that it makes you look like you're reaching for long form communication.
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I try to keep everything short and I will send multiple back to back.
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And no, I do not consider that double texting because it's only one message.
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Because it all ties in together and it was all sent within that same minute.
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So, that's how I do it.
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Now, what I do from there is I only entertain women who enjoy a masculine to feminine dynamic.
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So, what that means is the next message I'll send the next day.
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Is something that will probably qualify them.
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So, I'll say something like, "Are you sweet in real life?"
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Are you sweet IRL?
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What I'm doing is I'm already loosely setting expectations.
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Okay, there's not a lot of women who are going to say no to this.
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Because most people want to align themselves with good traits.
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Okay, let me give you an example.
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Pretty much everybody does this.
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It doesn't matter who you are.
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If a person, let's say, is a bad person, but you ask them, "Are you a good person?"
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Typically, they will always say yes.
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Because nobody really wants to align themselves with negative qualities.
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So, if you say, "Are you sweet in real life?"
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You will probably get a yes.
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You're loosely setting expectations.
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And then you can message the next day.
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Or what I do is I will just message the next day my number.
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I don't say anything else.
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I don't say, "Text me."
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I don't say, "Here's my number, message me."
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I just will text my phone number.
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Digit, digit, digit, digit, digit, digit.
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There's my number.
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And then you're going to just wait for her to text you.
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If she has genuine interest, if she has high interest, she will text you.
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This is why I'm teaching you how to only filter for high interest.
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I would say that out of all of the matches you're going to match with, I would say that probably only about 20% of them are going to have that real interest.
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Compared to all the other matches.
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That's actually going to go somewhere.
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So, what you want to do is you want to optimize your time and filter for high interest quickly.
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You wait for her to text you.
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And then once she texts you, you hold down on the message and you press the heart button.
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You want to actually heart the message.
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You validate it.
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So, once she says, "Hi, this is my name," or whatever.
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Heart the message.
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Okay, moving on.
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Here's what you do next or here's what I do next.
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Once you heart the message, I'll say something like, "Hi, cutie."
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And then these are like three messages back to back.
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But they're all in one, you know, 15 second block.
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I'll say something like, "Hi, cutie, send me a pick of you for your contact profile."
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Why do I want a profile picture of her?
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Because once again, I want to give the illusion that I'm talking to a lot of different women to potentially set up dates.
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So, I've actually had women who go out on dates with me, and what they'll say is they'll say.
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Yeah, I thought it was really bold of you to ask me for a contact profile right away.
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Because it just made me think that you have a lot of options.
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So, you want to see who's texting you.
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Okay, and that makes sense.
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Because from her point of view, she's basically saying.
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You have so many matches, you're talking to so many different women.
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That when they text message you, you actually want a picture of their face to pop up.
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So, you know who you're talking to.
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That's what they think when you do that.
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So, what you're doing is you're looking for her to agree to your request of a profile picture.
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And you're looking for her to agree to sending one.
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Basically, what you're doing is you don't want any friction.
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Okay, any friction and I'm out.
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If I get any friction on a dating app.
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If I get any friction, I'm out.
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I'm just going to stop replying.
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Because in 2025 and so on and so forth.
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It's going to get more competitive than it ever has been.
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Especially as online apps are the main way that most people today are dating and meeting.
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Any friction, and I'm talking any.
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I just will quit.
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Because I only want to optimize and filter for the women who have genuine interest in me.
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And if I spot any friction.
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What that tells me is if I was a different guy that she had more interest in.
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She wouldn't have even risked the friction in the first place.
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So, what would friction look like?
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Okay, friction basically looks like if she says something along the lines of, "Well, you can just go and use one of the pictures from my profile for my contact."
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Meaning she doesn't send you one.
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Any friction and I'm out.
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I optimize for zero friction and I only want genuine desire and high interest.
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So, next what I do.
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Okay, once I get the photo.
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Is I'll ask her how her day is and what she's doing.
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Something along those lines.
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How's your day or what are you up to?
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Okay, something like that.
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And she will give a reply, and then once she gives a reply, what I'll do probably the next day is I'll invite her to FaceTime.
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Why do I want to do this?
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Because I use FaceTime to see if I can bypass the feeling of an awkward formal first date.
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Awkward formal first date vibes are never good.
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I want to see if we can FaceTime, so it automatically feels like we already had a date.
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And on top of it, here's what you got to remember.
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As you guys increase your value, you're not going to want to just hang out with anybody.
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So, like me, for example, I don't really have the time to just go and meet up with a stranger.
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That I don't really know if I even necessarily like their personality.
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So, the FaceTime, yeah, you can think of it where it's for her, so she builds comfort with you.
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But honestly, at this point of my life, I'm doing it for me, so that way I know if this is a an option for me that I would want to invest in.
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That's why I do it.
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Now, next.
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Okay.
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If the FaceTime is going good or something like that, I invite her to do something that's active and in motion for the date.
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Or for us meeting up.
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When I say active and in motion, I do not want to be sitting there passive.
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This is why I'm not a big fan of like, um.
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Sitting passively at a restaurant eating food for the first date.
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I've done stuff like that.
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I don't like sitting in a flat stagnant spot.
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Like I don't want to just be sitting there passive.
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I want to be in motion, active, masculine.
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And then she's basically following me on that journey.
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So, I optimize for movement.
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You need movement.
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At least I believe you need movement for me and for my personality.
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This works best.
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Okay, so, hiking.
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Going on a walk.
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Taking them to the gym.
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Running them through a workout.
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Right?
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Even let's say you have, um.
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You know, a place or a, let's say you live in like a a condo or an apartment complex with like, um.
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Let's say shared grounds where maybe you have a pool or a hot tub.
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Maybe you invite to swim.
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Right?
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Something like that.
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Or another thing that I do is I'll say, "Hey, let's take a cruise in my truck and we will go get ice cream."
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You have a very high probability of her wanting to do something like that if the FaceTime went well and she likes your personality and she finds you attractive.
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So, we're checking off a lot of boxes when it comes to her attraction mechanisms.
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We have the photos that prove competency.
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That we know how to take a good high status photo.
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Our communication's on point because we've created a masculine to feminine polarizing dynamic.
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We FaceTimed her and she sees that our personality is not awkward.
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Now she has really high interest.
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Okay, so she's going to probably agree to these things and she's probably going to have a good attitude when she comes.
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Because she's excited to meet you.
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You're only filtering for high interest on that date.
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So, on that date, what I'm doing is I'm looking for eye contact.
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Is she holding eye contact, is she smiling a lot at me?
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I'm looking at things like, uh, you know, is she looking at me?
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For an extended amount of seconds or is she purposely trying to look away where it seems like she's not interested?
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Is she complimenting me?
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Okay, another thing is like, for example, you have to read body language.
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If you're sitting there on the couch, if she sits close to you.
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Or if she just wants to snuggle up to you.
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She has high interest.
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If you notice that the body language is distant.
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And then you know in real life, you guys don't have that type of chemistry.
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And she probably doesn't feel attracted to you in real life.
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And that's okay.
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That's just how it goes sometimes.
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So, here's what I can tell you, you cannot create real chemistry.
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It's either there or it isn't.
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Okay, this is the biggest problem with most guys.
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Is most guys are sitting there trying to create attraction.
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You cannot create attraction.
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Attraction either is there or it's not.
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Like your delivery, your mannerisms, your personality, how you look, how you walk, how you talk, and how you operate.
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There's going to be some women who really like you.
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And there's going to be some women who don't.
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And you're not going to be everybody's type.
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Okay?
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Like, for example.
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I could try to say or do anything on that date, but like this is me.
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Right, this is me, this is how I look.
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This is who I am.
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I'm 28 years old, I'm from North Dakota.
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Right?
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I can't be something that I'm not.
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So, you can't create attraction.
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It's either there or it isn't.
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You'll know if she finds you attractive.
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Okay, and here's what I can tell you, the reason why you guys have to really master this stuff that I'm teaching.
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It's getting harder than it ever has been.
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Okay?
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The competition is going up.
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It is getting more difficult because more and more men are attempting to fix their dating life.
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And I can even tell you this, more and more men today are appealing to the female lens of attraction through their photos.
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Okay?
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So, because this is getting harder and harder, not only have I created numerous things inside of my community for you, but I have created different products specifically inside of that community.
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Different processes to actually help you appeal to the female lens of attraction.
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To help optimize your photos to set up your frameworks properly.
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So, that way you can actually have the success on these apps and through your photos and through your messaging that you're actually wanting.
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Be sure to join us inside of that, hit the like button, comment and subscribe and we'll see you in the next one.
Topics:dating appsmessaging womendating 2025high interest womenattraction strategydating profile photoshypergamymasculine feminine dynamiconline dating tipsCasey Zander
